Lupin quotes from Lupin III

[previewing the next episode] Next time I fall in love with Jackie O. Or maybe not. I don't know. My head hurts. It kind of looks like her and sure looks like love. Walking in the rain, putting on a little show for perverts with binoculars. Oh, he's not? He's trying to kill me? Actually, you know, that kind of adds a touch of kink. Anyway, catch you later in Snake Charmer.

I don't know which is worse, that she's alive and doesn't remember me, or that she's here.

It says, "I've decided that Japan is too old-fashioned for me. Thanks for your help, aloha." [He realizes that Hanshichi pulled a sleight-of-hand trick and switched the boxes] Damn, he snookered us, the old fart!

[previewing the next episode] This next one's just too weird for words. It's sort of 'Twilight Zone' meets 'House of Wax' meets an exhausted writing staff under deadline pressure.

[rubbing his eye] Man, I'm beat.

Hey, uh, Goemon? You know, technically, boneheaded stunts don't count as harakiri.

So that's it, Gemarschaft. Looks just like any other peaceful, boring village. [He drives further into the seemingly empty village, gets out and looks around] Hmm, did I say peaceful? More like comatose.

I gotta admit, I did have an unusually peaceful sleep last night. [He pulls out a pair of earplugs] Modern technology's really a wonderful thing.

Sorry, sister. Didn't mean to lose my head. Toodles!

And that is that. [To his astonishment, the bubble reforms] Aw, man. That may not be that.

Okay, pal. Catch me if you can. [The bubble emerges underwater] Damn! I didn't mean it!

Listen to you guys! Bitch, bitch, bitch! Look at me! What the hell's going on? I'm fine, so what's with the funeral? Well?!

Hey, guys. Shouldn't we be out stealing something, or running for our lives, or, uh... I dunno, something? I feel like I'm in a rest home here.

It's alright, it's just a party favor. Happy New Year.

[drowsily answering the phone] The number you've dialed is no longer in service. Check your telephone directory or the information operator for the correct number and go to hell. [He hangs up, but the phone rings again and falls off the dresser. Lupin slithers out of bed and lies half out of it with his mouth near the reciever] You've reached Lupin's mouth. His brain is still asleep. Oh, then you prefer to speak to somebody else? Okay. JIGEN!! PHONE!! IT'S FOR YOU!!!