A character in Loonatics Unleashed
You had to bring the fuzz.
[Lexi grins sheepishly before hearing both Zozo and Wonderfluff chirping inside Duck's jetpack.]
Uh, there's a party going on in your backpack, Duck.
Oh, I never go out into the field with some chocolate ab-inducer bars. They must be pretty hungry.
Hello? Professor Zhane? We’ve come about your bio-pets; we have reason to believe that they're very, very- [Lexi gets cut off by the appearance of three mutated Fuz-Zs]
Well, looks like they've already had their chocolate today.
I hope that's all they crave.
[They suddenly hear Zane's voice from behind, the latter of whom proves Lexi wrong and dashes her hopes on chocolate being the only thing the Fuz-Zs crave.]
Sounds like someone's mommy didn't give them enough chockies when they were wittle!
[entertained but also disgruntled] Oh, you're just as naive as the Acmetropolis Science Council. Imagine, firing me because they deemed my experiments too "dangerous". They never appreciated me, all my genius, my...
[interrupts] Insanity, craziness? Am I getting close?
[unfazed] Hardly. I decided Acmetropolis needed to see first hand what I am capable of. [His flashback to the meteor hitting Acmetropolis is shown as he begins to tell his story.] When the meteor hit Earth, the impact opened all kinds of fissures.
[off-screen] Including the ones in your brain, Mr. Zane?
[continues his story as the Fuz-Z's appear in the flashback.] I discovered these delightful creatures. [His flashback self picks up a Fuz-Z.] Their biology was perfect for the experiments I had in mind: experiments that led to the Fuz-Z. [He feeds a Fuz-Z some chocolate in his lab in the flashback, which mutates it. He activates a pulse from his electric leash to put the Mutated Fuz-Z under his control. The flashback ends as he finishes his story.] So cute and cuddly, until they have a bit of chocolate. Then, the only way to stop them is with this.
[He points to his electric leash. The mutant Fuz-Z's prepare to consume Lexi and Duck.]
Care to demonstrate?
No. They need their protein.
[Suddenly, an explosion occurs as Ace and the other three Loonatics break into the Lab with the Exo Vac.]
See? Too much chocolate will make ya sick.
I'll check on your order, sir. Please hold.
[Duck jumps off his seat on the couch and lands in front of Slam.]
Just trying to jazz things up a bit. Give the costume a little flare, stand up more in front of the boss lady.
Uh-huh.
[He eats the last watermelon and grins at Duck.]
Like you care.
[We cut to Ace and Lexi walking up to Tech, who is practicing meditation, having been taught by the former on how to do it.]
He's so into the meditating thing.
Ever since I showed him how to do it, nothin' disturbs 'im.
Hello? Hello? [types phone numbers on his phone trying to get a cell signal] This is ridiculous! It's the 28th century. We've got jetpacks, hovercrafts, computer-synchronized Latte makers, but I still can't get a good cell signal on the 134th floor!
[Suddenly, Duck's phone rings. The annoying ringtone disturbs Tech's concentration as his eyes pop open in surprise. Ace and Lexi look on with smug smirks on their faces.]
[annoyed] Duck, shut that ringer off.
At least the ringer works. The rest of it's junk.
Have some respect. I'm clearing my mind, here.
[scoffs] Hmph, please. You need a hazmat team to clear the junk out of your head, Tech. [His phone rings again.] Hello? Hello? [grunts in frustration] I've had it! No more technology for me! From now on, I do everything the old-fashioned way.
Yeah, right. No phone? No EMP-3 Music Blaster 5000?
And no high-tech weapons?
Who needs 'em? My bare hands are lethal weapons.
You couldn't go one low-tech week without high-tech stuff.
Oh-ho-ho, really? Well, I'm not you, Mr. Techno Geek!
[Tech stands up, towering over Duck.]
Make you a bet. If you can get through one week, I'll buy you that new cape myself. And if not, you buy it for me.
I want the matching knee-high boots.
No problem.
You're on, Mister!
[They shake hands and the bet is made.]
By the way; I'm a thirteen. Wide.
[Duck glares at him. After his orange triangle appears, the scene changes to the Loonatics gathered around for a briefing with Zadavia about Black Velvet.]
Gather 'round, Loonatics. We have a major crisis, besides Duck's new costume request. [to Tech] Begin the holographic imaging feed.
[Tech does so, and the screens show Black Velvet and her Shadowborgs' crimes.]
Moments ago, someone calling herself, "Black Velvet", stole the Acme Doppler Series Five Radar System.
That system directs all air and space traffic in and out of Acmetroplis.
So much for my weekend getaway to Acme Pulco.
I'm afraid it gets worse. They've also taken the Acme Super Computer.
That's the most advanced system on the planet. I should know, I built it for them.
See what happens when you rely on technology? Utter chaos! I am so going to win this bet!
Duck, pay attention!
Yes'm.
I'm uploading security footage now.
Get us a closer shot of those raiders, Tech.
[Tech does so.]
Done. [sees Black Velvet] Hmm, most fascinating.
[They see how quite attractive and hot Black Velvet is, and the guys are seen admiring her attractiveness, which made Lexi jealous and resentful.]
Wait! I can wake him!
[grunts] Aarrgh! That annoying phone!
I need a little help here, Tech!
Activating Night Vision.
Ha! Too little, too late! [She steps in front of the Shroud Caster's controls.] Darkness was my curse. Now, it will be yours, Loonatics.
A bet’s a bet.
[Zadavia's hologram appears.]
Good work, Loonatics.
You know, you're all despicable!
[Weathervane tries to zap the Loonatics with lightning, but Tech gets out a lighting rod, gets zapped by lightning, yelps in pain, and then turns to dust]
Nice lighting rod Tech. That's defenetly going to earn you some vacation time.
[Tech revives himself using his healing powers]
Can I take it right now?
Let me think about it. Yes, no, yes, no, yes, NO!
All the elements are in my command. I don't need to report the story. I am the story. [cackles, to cameraman] Make sure you get this. It'll make everyone forget about Misty Breeze!
Forget about Misty Breeze? Well, I'd sort of forget, uh, well, What's-Her-Name, here. [referring to Lexi, who gasps, offended by this remark.]
Time for you to be gone with the wind!
[She forms a tornado which sucks up the Loonatics. Ace grabs onto a pole to break himself free. Slam gets thrown out of the tornado and crashes into a wall. Duck screams as he Quacks out of the tornado and ends up on a TV screen.]
Look, mommy, I'm on TV.
You're on, Slam!
[Slam starts to spin and battle against the tornado.]
Ace! Help!
[Ace launches a grappling hook to rescue Lexi and pulls her out of the tornado.]
[rescues Lexi] Gotcha!
[grunts as she lands] Thanks!
Not gonna miss! NOOOOOOOO-HO-HO-HO!!!
[Tech grabs him and launches a grappling hook onto a fountain stone support and pulls himself and Rev out of the tornado.]
I was gonna get you next.
[winks at Rev] I got impatient.
[They see Slam sucking up the tornado with his own tornado. He completely absorbs the tornado and defeats it. The people cheer for Slam and he puts his fists into the air in celebration. This only angers Weathervane even further.]
They defeated my clouds, my lightning, my tornado! But can they defeat all of them at once?! I release all the forces of the elements upon you, Acmetropolis! [fires lightning bolts at a tall buliding and a train track, stopping a train with a passenger coach dangling dangerously over the edge.] Bring me Misty Breeze or start building an ark!
Move it, Loonatics!
Yo! What's up, rock? Drop the Devil and back away!
[Slam's eyes glow bright purple again, and uses his lightning tornado spin to break himself free once more. The rock robot throws rocks at Ace, who blasts one with his Laser Vision, then kicks another. The robot then throws more rocks at Slam, who catches one and tries to block some more rocks thrown at him, but he slides backwards trying to do so, and eventually loses grip on the first rock, dropping it and it presumably breaks. The robot throws more rocks at him, sending him backwards towards a cliff. Slam tries to stand his ground, but sliding backwards causes him to nearly lose his balance on the edge. The robot throws one more rock at him, sending him falling off of the cliff!]
[Horrified and enraged] SLAM!!!
[Deeply enraged, Ace uses his Laser Vision to attack the robot, forcing it backwards. He then strikes it with a kick before using his Laser Vision again to force it towards the cliff, all the while yelling, shouting and roaring in rage. With a shout, he blasts his Laser Vision one more time at the rock robot, finishing it off by sending it falling off the cliff, destroying it while it lands right on top of Slam, who survived. Ace looks down and sees Slam squeezing his way out of the destroyed robot.]
Oh, man! [calls out to Slam] Hey, Slam? You okay? [relieved] Oh, I'm sorry about that whole "droppin' a rock monster on ya" thing there, buddy.
[Meanwhile, with Lexi and Duck, they're still battling the other two rock monsters.]
Duck! Any sign of Dr. Dare? [dodges an attack and Brain Blasts the rock monster golem robot, destroying it.]
No! [gets grabbed by the golem] Hey! [grunts as he struggles to break free from the golem's grip, then Quacks himself away, leaving a Flame Egg Orb in it's hand, which explodes, destroying the robot. He reappears.] Wow! I even impressed myself! Ha-ha! I gotta remember how to do that. [gasps as another golem appears towards him]
[through his communicator to Tech] Yo, Tech! What do you got?
My scanners are picking up a strange energy field around them. There's a high probability they're being controlled by the powers of the Jade Serpent Crystal.
The hot issue isn't how they're working, it's how we're gonna beat 'em! We've gotta level the playing field! Tech, can you jump start that thing?
[runs off to try to start the Mobile Magma Mover again, and sees the word "DANGER" above. He presses a button to elevate himself to the power plug. He presses another switch to reveal the power supply.] This might work. If I can just reroute the power reserve to the front thrusters. [rushes to the plug itself to plug it up, but it's not wide enough. He shakes the plug desperately.] Come on! [grunts as he tries to plug it in, but to no avail. He groans] Ugh, fine. [looks at his ears and gets an idea. He places his hand on the plug, and plugs his ears in and screams in pain as he gets electrocuted by the energy, frying him and turning him into dust, then heals himself back to normal with his regeneration powers, although steam bellows out of him because of his electrocution. He mutters angrily] Gotta be an easier way to be a hero. [starts the Mobile Magma Mover again and pilots it to crush the rock golem monster robots as Duck and Lexi move out of the way.] Alright! Rock on! [uses his Mobile Magma Mover to finish off the last of Dr. Dare's rock robot minions. Once that's done, he stops the Mover.] Yeah!
[His green triangle appears, then the scene changes to the Loonatics talking about the rock golems they've just defeated.]
So, what were those things?
Reminds me of some of the guys who keep calling you - except the rocks have more personality! Haha! [gets Brain-Blasted by an annoyed Lexi] Yike! Watch the feathers!
Those rock guys are the security guards, which means we must be close to Dare's lair.
[Suddenly, they hear Dare's voice as the underground cave shakes all around them as more buildings come in upside down by sinking underground.]
[off-screen] You're not close. You're here. Just in time to see the power of the Jade Serpent turn Acmetropolis upside down!
[through his communicator to Tech] Tech, what's goin' on?
I told you he was a crack-bot! Let's get goin'!
[Green rays of light shine below them as the ground begins to crack and give away as Dare appears sitting on a rock throne.]
I hope you've enjoyed your little visit down here, because it's now your permanent residence! In fact, soon all of Acmetropolis will reside underground, and I will live in peace on the surface!
Are you kidding me, Doc?! That's the most ridiculous idea I've ever heard!
You won't be laughing when you're buried in stone, Bunny!
[With a grunt, he fires a green ray from his scepter at Ace and the Loonatics, causing the cave to collapse.]
Take cover!
[He and his teammates rush back into the Mobile Magma Mover as rocks come raining down.]
Sayonara, Loonatics!
[He laughs maniacally as he escapes while the Mobile Magma Mover is buried along with the Loonatics inside a big pile of rocks. After a few moments, Slam bursts out of the rockpile using his tornado powers and clears away the rest of the rocks, freeing his teammates and the Magma Mover.]
Nice work there, Slam.
Thank you!
We gotta get up to Acmetropolis before-
[hologram appears on the radar screen] Before there is no Acmetropolis. [takes off her hood] Dr. Dare's continuing to turn the world inside out. You must hurry. If you do not do something quickly, this madman will bury us all!
[The screen shows more buildings being sunk underground and replaced with mountains as people run for their lives. The screen then statics back.]
Let's get this Mover movin' before we lose power, too!
[Tech powers up the Magma Mover again to pursue Dare back up to Acmetropolis. They then reach the surface.]
Nice drivin', Tech! Looks like we're... [To his and everyone else's shock and horror, they see nothing but mountains and depressed people.] a little late.
It's Acmetropolis!
Talk about an extreme makeover.
[sees the green glow from Dare's fortress] Dare's using the Jade Serpent to turn our world inside out. So, we've gotta use that gem to reverse it!
[The Loonatics drive their dirt buggies up to Dare's tower. Rev overtakes them with his super-speed and reaches the summit first.]
I couldn't've said it better myself!
Excuse me. Coming through.
The Loonapests! I thought I buried all of you down below.
Haven't you heard? Down is the new up!
Yeah, we would've called first, but you were unlisted.
And now, we're gonna stop your insidious plan, stone cold!
[chuckles] Stones are my domain, Duck. [waves his hand over some gem stones, which turn green.] But, there's no reason you all can't join my little rock group.
[The Jade Serpent powers up around the Loonatics as the power of the crystal made it's way around their bodies to slowly turn them into stone.]
Hey! What's with the rock candy?
You'll become my own personal statues. A commemorative of what once was! Not that I'm paying tribute to you.
Ace, if we don't shut down that machine now, the entire planet is gonna-!
[Before he could finish, the glowing energy clams his mouth shut. Ace, seeing the angle surfaces on the rock from above, use his Laser Vision to bounce off of them and into the Jade Serpent to free him and his teammates, much to Dare's horror.]
My lovely Jade Crystal! No!! [The heroes are freed, forcing the mad scientist to retreat.] You'll never catch me!
Hit it, Ace! Maneuver 29! [Ace launches her at Dare.] Okay, Dare! Let me help you crawl back under the rock where you came from!
[She kicks him backwards off his throne platform and lands in front of Ace, who's eyes glow yellow and takes out his sword. The two then engage in a swordfight. Dare kicks Ace backwards, then the rabbit charges back at him over some green anime-style speed lines and strikes him back, knocking him flat on his back. He then gets up again.]
Power of the Crystal, be mine!
[while he tries to start the digging machine again] Come on! Ugh, fine. [he then gets fried, turns to dust and then revives himself with his healing powers] There has got to be an easier way to be a hero.
Mayor, your life has been saved by Danger Duck!
[the branch beneath The Mayor breaks and she falls.] Gee, tha-a-a-anks! [she hits the ground with a thud.]
Well, kind of.
I think it's time we take a trip to the big top. Let's jet.
[His yellow triangle appears, then the scene changes to the Loonatics heading to the Galactic Oddities Space Circus ship.]
Maybe we'll get free passes to the Interstellar Orbiting Space Circus for doing a good deed for returning an Intergalactic Oddity to its home. Oh, yes! It'll be so cool! I love the circus. There's so much good stuff to eat! Candy and popcorn and delicious taffy. It'll be totally sweet, sweet, sweet!
[The monkey chirps excitedly in her cage, to Duck's annoyance.]
[annoyed] Hey! Zip it, Lizard Lips! This is all your fault!
[Lexi giggles at him. Tech's eyes glow green as he uses his magnetic powers to take the cage away from Duck, then gently sets it down and opens the gate to let the monkey out.]
You're free to go, little one.
Well look on the bright side; it can't get any worse than this.
[regenerates himself using Tech's powers while having heard everything Duck said, angrily] So, you're the one! I always suspected it might be you, but, how could I just come out and accuse you without any proof? [angrily points at Duck] Man, it's been bugging me for months! I don't know why I'm surprised, really. Duck, if I had to pick one teammate who would stoop so low-!
[glaring at Rev, annoyed] I liked you better when you were a smoldering husk.
Who's got Slam's power?
Oh, hey! That'd be me!
Oh, I did forget one thing. Duck, we need to talk. Alone. Now.
[laughs] Busted.
[glares at Slam then looks back fearfully at Zadavia, groans meekly] Help.
[The final scene of the episode is a shot of the Loonatics' headquarters while zooming out to show the rest of Acmetropolis below the tower as the episode ends and the staff credits and the Warner Bros. Animation logo roll.]
Team, we have a problem.
[groans] Can't it wait 'til halftime?
Now, Duck.
[The rest of the Loonatics appear.]
What's up, boss?
There's a thief at large committing robberies all over Acmetropolis.
Ace BunnyCharlie Schlatter · 51 quotes
LLexi36 quotes
RRev23 quotes
ZadaviaCandi Milo · 12 quotes
MassiveMichael Clarke Duncan · 8 quotes
SlamKevin Michael Richardson · 8 quotes
MMastermind7 quotes
MCMallory Casey6 quotes
OptimatusCharlie Adler · 5 quotes
RipMikey Kelley · 5 quotes
DeuceKhary Payton · 4 quotes
Dr. DareSimon Templeman · 3 quotes
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Loonatics Unleashed pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
Loonatics Unleashed · 119 quotes