Joey quotes from Liv and Maddie

Joey

[confessional] Space Werewolves is the greatest sci-fi graphic novel ever. It is the epic tale of Tristan Lycanth; Half-wolf, half-human, and his battle to save his planet. It is like Star Wars and Lord of the Rings had a baby, and then The Avengers adopted it.

Mom, snack update. Where's Liv's favorite dip?

Joey

You mean this dip? [Joey and Parker are eating the dip]

You two are eating the dip?! This is Wisconsin, you can't welcome people home without dip! You two are officially banned from the welcome home zone!

Joey

Let's put this TV in our room.

Parker

But Mom and Dad said that we can't have a TV in our room.

Joey

Mom and Dad who?

Joey

The Z-Phone 620Q. It's ruined.

Counter life's not for you. Back to the Muck bucket.

Joey

Can I still wear the cape?

That's a no-no, Jo-Jo.

I'm sorry, I couldn't hear you over the deafening sound of my own epicness, BOOM!

Joey

Hey! That's my line!

But, I make it work.

Joey

The only reason I did this Santa Stand was so that I could pay off your Christmas present. [Joey takes out helicopter] I talked Mom out of getting you that helicopter because I already got it for you.

Parker

I'm sorry, Munch, I had no idea you cared.

Joey

Me either, I guess it's just the Christmas spirit.

Joey

Parker, Dad, come quick before it stops!

Pete

What is it, son?

Parker

Is it snowing on Christmas?

Joey

Better!

Pete

...I got her those for Christmas.

Well, it's nice to have fans on the set. So what do you think of the scene, boys?

Parker

I think you're ruining the greatest story ever told!

Joey

This is the most action-packed moment in the graphic novel, and you're going to have her skip over a puddle and pose for pictures? This is an abomination!

Parker

I have no idea what that word means, but if it means... (blows a raspberry and gives a thumbs down gesture) then I concur!

Joey

(to Emily, while in the prank-proof box) Please. You didn't really want to go to the dance with me, and this was all an elaborate ruse to prank me. Well, the ruse is on yous. (looks puzzled, but then shrugs and nods)

Who's trying to prank you?

Joey

You, and the rest of the snooty, yet beautiful people who think you own the school. Well, let me tell you something, Emily. You may be cute, popular and on the honor roll, but I have seen your cartwheels, and they are inconsistent at best! (Emily gasps)