Now is not the time to have a one night stand with your conscience.
S1 E7Wrongful Death
You so much as belch out of line and I'll have your scrotum on a barbed wire plate.
I set the rules here.
[just caught by DCI Hunt]
BKBilly Kemble
Oh, bollocks.
My thoughts exactly. [knees Kemble in aforementioned spot]
[to Sam]
You're never happy unless you're making my life complicated, are ya.
AKAndrea Kemble
He your boss? What would I get for smacking him one?
A round of applause from half our station.
If we can't police ourselves, how are the public supposed to trust us?
The public don't give a damn what we do, as long as we get results.
You're wrong.
[yelling] GET ME OUT OF HERE!
I don't know... [pause] ... who the biggest dickhead is round here. [to Ray Carling] You, for what happened... [to Sam] You, for your holier than thou act... or me, for having any of you on my team.
Detective Sergeant Ray Carling, you are hereby stripped of your rank and demoted to Detective Constable. From now on, your main responsibilities will be maintenance of CID stationery cupboard. You will account for every pen, pencil and paper clip in this office.
Oh, come on, guv...
You will only participate in other investigations at my discretion. Half your wages for the next twelve months, including any overtime, will be deducted by me and given directly to the Police Benevolent Fund. You are also barred from the Railway Arms until I decide otherwise. You so much as belch out of line and I'll have your scrotum on a barbed-wire plate.
S1 E8The Good Father
[Reading a title of a pornographic film]
Once Upon A Time In Her Vest? [disgusted] You dare to pollute the glorious genre of the American Western?
[To Annie, touching her cheek]
Just so that you know. I don't hate everything about this place.
I think you've forgotten who you're talking to.
An overweight, over-the-hill, nicotine-stained, borderline-alcoholic homophobe with a superiority complex and an unhealthy obsession with male bonding?
You make that sound like a bad thing.
VTVic Tyler
I've got a young lad named Sam.
I've got a pain in the arse called Sam!
[disgusted] Looks like they've been thinking up [porn movie] titles.. Listen to this: "On Her Majesty's Secret Cervix".
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Life on Mars pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.