Leverage · Season 1
Mr. Ford, in the service of good, sometimes we have to deal with bad people and do bad things.
Really? 'Cause I work with a bunch of bad guys who are more honorable than you'll ever be. If we're gonna have this arrangement, never play me again.
Nate... Hypnosis is something you do to a mark. Not your own crew.
No, no, no. It's exactly what you do to your own crew. Yeah, you push whatever button you need to, to get them to do what needs to be done. You wanted to know what other quality you needed to run your own crew. Well, that's it. And you don't have it.
[After Hardison and Parker leave]
[To Nate] Alone again. If I didn't know you better, I think you like it like that.
FBI, sir. That young lady's in our custody.
Aw, see, you made two mistakes, bro. First, you flashed that fake-ass FBI badge at me. Second, [points at Eliot] you spilled his coffee.
[later, at the pub]
Where's Eliot?
Oh, he had to change his shirt. He got coffee on it...and some blood, some teeth.
Since when do you question me?
Since you went off the rails and we had to pull you out of jail and ended up getting blackmailed, thank you very much.
Fair enough.
You realize the last guy that pushed Hoffman ended up dead.
Yeah, well, let him take his best shot. We'll see who walks away this time.
[to Eliot] Prison's changed him.
Better or worse?
I'm not sure.
You do realize that that stunt you pulled defines 'out of control.'
I just wanted you to see that I would never put any of you at risk if I wasn't willing to take the same chances myself.
I love how you think that's comforting.
I'm glad she finally got closure.
Who?
Ashley.
[Parker crushes the beer bottle in her hands]
You need to talk to him.
Who?
Hardison.
[Parker crushes the bottle further]
You don't like it when he talks to other women.
I don't care who he talks to.
[Sophie picks up a glass shard]
What you're feeling is called jealousy, Parker.
[Laughs] I'm not jealous. No. I'm not jealous. No. It's just that when I see them together, I...Don't Like It.
So, I have to tell you something.
Okay. [pause] Did--did you want to talk now?
Yeah, okay. So, the thing is, I think that maybe I might be having feelings. Like weird, weird feelings... f-for...[pauses, looks around] pretzels.
Pretzels. Okay. Well, they're right here. When you want them.
Now, I rigged my laptop to record your com. Now this means that I can alter your pitch from anywhere to make you sound like Darth Eliot...
[voice like Darth Vader] I don't speak on command, Hardison.
...to Spencer Smurf.
[voice like Smurf] I don't speak on command, Hardison.
Hardison.
Don't ever do the Smurf thing again?
Riiiight.
You ever been in love?
Once.
How'd it end?
I made her a promise that if she ever need me, I would be there for her.
What's wrong with that?
'Cause I made the same promise to the United States Government, and I found out you can't make that promise to more than one person.
I don't think I am being strange enough.
I doubt that.
There's a price on my head in three different countries and I'm fairly certain a fatwa was issued!
You are so vain, man. Boom, there, fan site nuked, but when you get back, we gonna have us a serious conversation about the difference between caution and paranoia.
When you've done the things I've done, there's no such thing as paranoia.
Sometimes you--you--you don't get a second chance to get it right.
Why not?
Rules of life.
But that's exactly what we do. We change the rules.
You can come with me, you know. You're a natural-born country star if I've ever seen one. Maybe the next Johnny and June?
Some roads, you start going down, well, you can't turn back, and... I'm about a hundred miles down one of those right now.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Leverage pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
