Cassidy quotes from Law & Order: Special Victims Unit

Cassidy

I've been on this beat for eight months.

Stabler

Right.

Cassidy

And at first I was fine with it, but sometimes, I just, um, I just can't...

Stabler

Instead of seeing a woman, you see a uterus, cervix...

Cassidy

Yeah.

Stabler

It's a clinical phase. It lasts a while.

Cassidy

So what's the next phase?

Stabler

You don't want to know.

Cassidy

Yeah, go ahead. Rain on my parade.

Munch

I don't just want to rain on your parade. I want to blow up all the floats.

Cassidy

I don't get S&M. I mean, "Hurt me, that turns me on?" Come on, what's up with that?

Munch

It starts with the tattoos. Once you get the ink, it's just a matter of time before you're begging to be tied up and spanked.

Cassidy

Yeah, tattoos are just the gateway to the sexual dark side, my friend.

Stabler

You guys have finally figured me out, huh?

Jeffries

Seriously. Did you get off on the tiny little pinpricks of pain?

Stabler

No, I get that from working with you.

Munch

The powers that be always protect themselves and the FBI are their hired guns-

Cassidy

[finishes for him] -fronting for the Trilateral Council, the World Bank, and the Mansons.

Masons.

Cassidy

When you get married-

Benson

If I get married.

Cassidy

As long as you have this job, your marriage will be an affair.

Police union found us better health insurance.

Cassidy

This form is longer than the last book I read.

Munch

Don't you see what they're doing?

Jeffries

Yeah, they're looking out for you, Munch. Psychiatric coverage increased to 80%.

Uh, there's 2 "R"s in "hemorrhoids."

Cassidy

I'm a desk jockey. What do you want from me?

Cassidy

For a 50 year old, this guy had a lot of energy.

What's that supposed to imply?

Cassidy

Oh, nothing. I'm sure you and John have just as much.

Munch

Nice view.

Cassidy

Yeah, at night, too.

Munch

You've been here at night, too?

Cassidy

Yeah, you know. On a...a case.

Munch

Case of what?

Cassidy

Well, you know, like a...like a date. With a friend.

Munch

What friend is that?

Cassidy

Guy. Buddy of mine. Pal.

Munch

Uh huh.

Cassidy

What?

Munch

Afternoons he often spent at the library. He told his secretary he needed time alone.

Cassidy

To think deep, legal thoughts behind the wheel of his Caddy, fly open to the breeze.

Jeffries

Wow. 4.7 million in one year.

Cassidy

That's pretty good for a fledgling charity.

Benson

Fledgling? I'm impressed.

Cassidy

Yeah, that's right, I'm a real dope, aren't I? You know what I did last night? I looked it up and memorized it just so I could impress you.

Cassidy

Whatever.

Munch

My generation pioneered that succinct abstraction, but to me it still means diddly.

Benson

Brian, you didn't do anything.

Cassidy

Once accused, always under suspicion. Even from you.

Benson

From me? Brian, I believed you.

Cassidy

I'd like to believe that. [starts to leave]

Benson

Whoa, Brian, Brian... So what, we're over now?

Cassidy

I don't know. [pause, smiles] Wanna get a drink somewhere and not talk about it?

Cassidy

Liv, you do believe me about the escorts?

Benson

Stop talking.

Cassidy

I swear, I didn't...

Benson

[seductively] Has anyone ever told you to just stop talking?

Cassidy

[smiles] Yeah, everyone, all the time.

When you went to arrest my client, did he have a swollen face and a black eye?

Cassidy

He resisted.

So you smashed his face into a desk and you called him a monkey?

Cassidy

That's a lie!

But you do admit you violently subdued him?

Cassidy

Yeah. He was trying to get away!

Because you are a loose cannon that cannot control his animal instincts.

Cassidy

Actually, the only animal in this courtroom, Counselor, is your client, Dr. West.

So all black men are animals to you?

Cassidy

Oh, c'mon! This is such garbage!

So you felt justified to take out your rage on him.

Cassidy

[screaming] So what if I did?!

Detective, that's enough...

Cassidy

After what he did to that boy, and all the other ones?

Detective, sit down!

Cassidy

He's lucky I didn't put him in a goddamn body bag!