Sonny quotes from Law & Order: Special Victims Unit

Keane signed the vacate order.

Sonny

He did? That's great! How'd you get him to do that?

He may have thought that he was graciously signing a letter of recommendation for my law school application.

Sonny

OK, I didn't hear that, and you didn't say that, but thank you.

Welcome to Queens. Let's go do this before the ink dries or any his deputies find out.

Fin

You can walk like a man now, Carlos.

Sonny

A free man.

Fin

Come on Carisi, you can trust us.

Sonny

I do, Fin, but every time I go out on a limb for you guys, somebody saws it off. Look, it's an academic institute. I need some patina of probable cause. [walks away]

Fin

Patina?

That guy was really a cop?

Benson

Hey, guys, he's just he's just doing his job.

Maybe I shouldn't ask this, but... Rollins knows this guy. Is there any chance that she's in on it, or maybe lost perspective?

Benson

No!

Sonny

And yeah, you're right, you shouldn't have asked.

Sonny

Miss Miglani. I've heard a lot about you.

Is that code for "I can be a pain in the ass"?

Sonny

Pretty much.

Sonny

I'm writing my resignation letter. I'm gonna lose this case. Ms. Hadid already knows. She has her spies in the courtroom. I'm done.

Benson

Carisi, you're not a quitter. No, no. It was your first day in court. You got knocked down, so you get back up again.

Sonny

What if I'm not cut out for this? [pause] You know what the worst part is? That I didn't protect Monica.

Benson

No, listen to me...

Sonny

I should have objected more. But if you object too much, the jury thinks the witness is hiding something, so I-I didn't know what to do. I just left her alone up there. A target.

Benson

Monica is a lot tougher than you think.

Sonny

Every aspect, every moment of her life, open to dissection. While Markeevious Ryan, he's just sitting there, smiling. He's sitting on the sidelines. She said it herself, Liv, it's not fair.

Benson

So use that. Figure out a way to get him into the game.

You're arraigning me in bed? Why don't you just pull the plug, already?

Sonny

Don't tempt me, Mr. Solis.

His nickname's Two-Bits. His M.O. is drop a quarter, bend for it, and rub his face in the woman's privates.

Sonny

Colorful.

Mr. Varick, you made a deal with the prosecution...

Sonny

Your Honor, the jury already heard about this...

...You were charged with forcible touching and unlawful surveillance. That's upskirting, isn't it? Good thing I wore pants today.

I was serving my country. I've been on the front lines of a foreign invasion for 20 years.

Sonny

Serving your country? By dipping your wick?

It was a test. It's the only way to know if they really love their husbands.

Sonny

Okay, okay. You told me before that if they really loved their husbands, they wouldn't sleep with you.

That's right.

Sonny

But when they refused you, you threw them in jail, and when they did sleep with you, you gave them their green card. Now, you can lie to yourself all you want, but you raped these women.

No, absolutely not! I was just doing what I had to do to protect our borders.

[nervous] Rory, he understands...

No, he doesn't understand it. I'm holding the line against more mouths to feed, more people on Medicaid, our public schools and our hospitals, taking our jobs! These people bleed the system dry, and I stop that from happening!

Sonny

Not one more word from you! What you did to these women... How many of them have had to live with your violation in secret, in fear? You took advantage of them when they were at their most helpless, their most vulnerable, and you used the power of your government position to force them to demean themselves. They came here hoping for the American Dream, and you made their lives a nightmare!

Sonny

[after witnessing Luna's meltdown] Is she trying for a psych defense?

Benson

I think she's trying to figure out what the hell's going on here. She's spent her entire career empowering women, and now she just... falls apart? Either she's got a split personality...

Sonny

Not likely.

Benson

Or her employees are framing her, and she's having a breakdown because she's being gaslighted.

When I was an ADA, this would be the moment where I would offer the defense a deal.

Sonny

Man-2 is still on the table. I can recommend the minimum.

That's exactly the offer I told Mickey you'd make.

Sonny

And what did he say?

Basically "no thank you," but more anatomical.

[raises his drink] Cheers.

Sonny

To what? Jury deliberates for 6 hours to find Mickey guilty of Man-2, and we are right back where we started.

To irony, then.

Zoey is worried the jury will see her as a crazy slut who tricked him.

Sonny

We always knew this was a risk.

She's a good person, just trying to pay her bills. He's the crazy one.

Sonny

I know that. My job is to make sure the jury knows it.

Aren't you supposed to protect the victim?

Sonny

Actually, my job is to uphold the law. Is there a reason that you don't like me?

I just can't believe that you were ever a cop.