Elliot Stabler quotes from Law & Order: Special Victims Unit

Stabler

Christina brought him breakfast. He rapes her for lunch.

Stabler

[reads hate-mail] "Roses are red, Violets are blue. When Jessie is dead, her corpse I will..." You get the idea. There's hundreds like this.

Stabler

How many teenage girls do you know who are too busy to have boyfriends?

Stabler

Romeo and Juliet killed themselves, not their parents.

Stabler

A man's DNA doesn't just pop up inside a woman without his participation.

Stabler

[after arresting Nick and Doug for Jason's murder] You like sea bass? You'll just love what we pulled out of the river.

Stabler

Eternal damnation is not a police matter.

Stabler

[To Huang] All you shrinks talk about is closure.

Stabler

What do you tell victims? Get help. The problem is you're not following your own advice right now.

Stabler

It means sometimes the only way to beat someone at a dirty fight, is to get right down into the gutter with them.

Stabler

[to Kathy] It's been a rough couple of days. And I've had a couple of days to think about what's important. I love my job and I love my family. And I nearly lost both of them. I wanna come home.

Stabler

[to a priest] So I confess to murder, what do you do? "Say five Hail Marys, hallelujah"?

Stabler

Security cameras across the globe. Munch'll never leave his house again.

Stabler

You know, I'm gonna have a child in a month. That's scary enough. But the thought that I was never gonna be able to see that child, that terrified me. Saul Picard? Bring him on.

Stabler

So you steal from the rich pharmaceutical companies and give to the poor transsexuals? You're kinda like Robin Hood and Maid Marion all rolled into one, huh?