EREddie Ryan
Flora was asking for you. She wants to know how come she hasn't seen you anymore in the deli.
Oh yeah? Well next time you see her tell her I'm on bivouac with a gorilla.
S1 E18Dead on His Feet
In the alley you couldn't see anything. And the alley was so dark you couldn't find your mouth with a $5 pizza.
S1 E19Down a Long and Lonely River
Hey look, kid, I'm gonna talk to you like a father. [laughs] And I never even put my arms around your mother.
AAAlan Ankrum
Well, he knows something about a gun with a filed-down firing pin, the gun that, eh, Elena threatened to kill herself with. Did you give her that gun, Dancik?
ADAlbert Dancik
A gun that doesn't shoot? That's a toy. I gave her a lot of toys, Alan.
You tell these G-men that they're obstructing justice and I want DeLuca down here! Otherwise, I'll bust these Feds for their funny haircuts!
S1 E20Mojo
You know why you're here, Marty?
MMarty
Yeah. Sometimes I black out.
You OD'd, baby!
Yeah, mojo, morphine, Mephistopheles, pins and needles, eeh... cubes, Aunt Emma. There are a dozen street names for it.
Look, a stick-up man is a stick-up man. A robber is a robber, and a hijacker is a hijacker. That's what they do: the rob, they steal and they hijack. They don't peddle morphine on the streets!
Maybe they sold the whole load, split. Maybe the idea of sending in a chemist spooked them.
And maybe they give away door prizes at the tombs.
I see you got a new plant.
Yeah. Shirley's lonely.
Oh really? Eh, tell me, how could you tell?
Well, her leaves are drooping down. And, eh, she's not her same gay, vibrant, effervescent, ebullient self.
Ebullient self, huh? Well, she might have, eh, heartburn. Did you ever think of that?
That's why I got Sam.
FFloyd
[on phone] Well you gotta be fresh out of marbles. 'Cause already I got a beanbag sitting in the narco ward that's gonna crumble like a bacon powder biscuit the moment the fuzz jumps on 'em. And now you're asking me to sit still for a visit from the heat?
MMarty
[to Kojak] You do what you gotta do. But you ain't gonna bust me up like some kinda cheap watch. You can bust my jaws if you want, that's your thing, but all you're going to get's a whole lot of ouches.
S1 E21Therapy in Dynamite
[about her brand new Minnie Mouse watch] Look at that: her two little hands are sticking straight down.
Like a watch.
Just like a watch. Or else she's standing on her fingertips.
Well don't give me that fishy look, Doctor. You just got a nicer job than we do!
I'm not going to, eh, lose you, am I?
[smiles] I'm not an account, honey, I'm a woman.
Candlelight, incense and after-diner drinks. I feel like a female Hugh Hefner.
All right, Miss Hefner, why don't you just, eh, put this in your pipe and eh... [hands her an envelope]
Smoke it?
Right on.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Kojak pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.