Hyacinth quotes from Keeping Up Appearances

Hyacinth

They are my family and I love them dearly, especially at this time of year, when it gets dark early.

Hyacinth

If there's one thing that distinguishes us from other people, it's the absence of vulgar noises.

Hyacinth

What a silly little voice!

Hyacinth

It could be a Neanderthal barrow, dear. It says in the guidebook they had barrows. I expect they wheeled rocks about and things!

Hyacinth

If my Sheridan were here, he'd be appalled.

Hyacinth

If there's one thing I can't stand, it's snobbery and one-upmanship. People trying to pretend they're superior. Makes it so much harder for those of us who really are.

Hyacinth

(on the phone) I've always thought you looked like Mummy's brave little soldier. Well, perhaps not soldier, dear. More like Mummy's brave little poet or interior designer.

Hyacinth

It's a terrible thing to lose one's Daddy just before a cheese and wine.

Hyacinth

(to the postman) I hope that's a first-class stamp. I object to having second-class stamps thrust through my letterbox. I should have thought postmen would be trained to recognise first-class stamp houses.

Hyacinth

Now listen, horse: I'm not a person to be trifled with.

Hyacinth

You'll pay for this, Richard Bucket! (realises her mistake) ...Bouquet!

Hyacinth

The Bucket residence, the lady of the house speaking! No, you cannot have a number 41 with noodles instead of rice. Do I sound like the Green Lotus? What do you mean "sounds more like the Green Dragon"? Look, I must warn you, you're speaking to a white slimline telephone within the precincts of a clergyman. And a very merry Chinese New Year to you, too!

Hyacinth

(on the phone to Sheridan) Your car needs a respray? Oh, but I thought your friends liked that lilac colour.

Hyacinth

Oh no dear! I couldn't let you loose as a Roman again!

Hyacinth

Home, Richard! I will not share my throne with those impostors!