Come on, guys. We're at the prime of our lives here. (stands up) I mean, it's our job to have fun while our parents are gone. What's wrong with us?
You know what they say? All work and no play makes... something something something.
Yeah, sure. Guys, let's get this party started with a round of smoothies before dinner.
That's both risky and exciting. (stands up) I'm in.
(stands up) I'd like mine with extra whipped cream.
Whoa Nick Nick Nick. Let's not get crazy here.
You're right, lost my head there for a minute. I'm sorry. (he, Joe and Kevin are going downstairs to the kitchen)
One boysenberry, butternut, bacon, blueberry with a... twist. (Kevin enters) (Joe pours one smoothie into a cup and puts a bacon with it and gives it to Kevin)
(drinks the smoothie) That is one smooth smoothie. Hmm. And cold. Ow. Ow. (touches his head) Brain freeze! (grunts) (dull thud) (he drops to the floor and Joe ignores him)
(looks at the refridgerator) Joe, the light's off. Did you unplug the refridgerator? (turns around and shows the unplugged fridge then asks Joe)
Had to so I could plug in my third blender.
Dude, mom crammed the week's worth of food in here for us. (closes the fridge then takes the cord and plugs it back on the power outlet)
runs to the fridge and opens it) Save the ice cream and icy treats first!
What about the vegetables?
Let 'em die. It'll be the perfect crime. (a montage of him, Joe and Nick taking out everything from the fridge and set them on the counter)
So you've all seen Kevin's sandwich crust? Mm-hmm. Oh! How about Nick's toenail clippings? (rattles) No, because I showed you those last week. (puts the clipboard on the table) (chuckles) (sighs) Okay, so this next item might not even it's there. But, trust me it's there. All right? I give you... Joe's eyelash. (shows her fan club) Not too close! It is fragile.
(enters the classroom) Oh, pardon me for a moment.
Please enjoy some bran muffins shaped like Kevin's head. (points to the muffins then the fan club walks to the table) Where have you been? And where are my smelly socks? I am dying here.
Sorry, no socks. Instead, I bring you... genuine JONAS worn by Kevin, Nick and Joe on their most recent concert tour. (squealing, giggling) (the fan club runs to the front of the classroom)Yep, that's right. Come up here and smell 'em cause apparently, you guys are-- you're into that. Okay.
Thank you so much, Stella.
Mm, no problem. (hugs Macy) Now carry on in your weird, yet apparently harmless world. (walks to the fan club)
Oh, wait! Everybody, this is Stella Malone! She's best friends with JONAS! (fans gasping, chattering) (fan club surrounds Stella) Uh, JONAS heads! Eyes over here...
And I designed that outfit. I know.
... On me. (the fan club ignores her but she picks up a bran muffin to take a bite then puts it the napkin)
You guys are gonna love this one. Okay.
Yeah yeah yeah, hold on. I was just getting ready to tell everyone why Kevin's shirt pocket is right in the middle of his chest.
Because he likes to keep his lucky guitar pick in there. Everybody knows that.
Well, that's what they print in the magazines, but the real reason is... I messed up.
GGirl
Oh my gosh! (all chattering, giggling)
These JONAS heads are adorable. What's up?
(gasps) What is up... is that show and tell ran an extra seven minutes. (she and Stella are looking at the clipboard) We missed snack time and I almost choke on a Kevin head and nobody even noticed. You're stealing my fan club.
Macy, don't be ridicious. This is your fan club, you're the president.
Fred (Macy and Stella turn around) All in favor of voting Stella Malone as our new fan club president, say "aye"! (all squealing, cheering) (Macy gasps) (a girl takes off Macy's picture of the bulletin board and replaces it with Stella's picture then the girl throws Macy's picture away)
I would yell at you, but a fan club rule says no yelling at the president. Ironically, a rule written by me!
We've gotta get these kids out of here.
I've tried, but they're like rabbits-- wild rabbits who love to party.
Isn't that a little renduant? All rabbits love to party.
I just hope dad doesn't call again.
CVComputer voice
Chat request. (Nick looks at Kevin and Joe)
(opens the computer again and turns it on) Answer it. (he, Joe and Kevin see their mom video chatting them)
Hi, mom. (he, Joe and Kevin wave to her) We thought you were dad.
If you think I'm dad, I'm definitely not wearing that bikini I packed.
Dad's been calling like every five minutes.
Well, you know, your father. He gets worried if he's got nothing to worry about.
Well, tell him, to go get worried because there's nothing to be worried about here.
Yeah, mom, no party, no broken vase. (two girls are on the couch (laughing) No jumping on the couch! No jumping on the couch.
Oh, I'm not worried. Ever since you were little, you guys have been trustworthy and responsible, not to mention adorable.
KJKevin, Joe and Nick
Thanks, mom.
I mean, soon you'll be moving out on your own. And I won't get to spend as much time with you, what with all the touring and-- you know what? I don't want to spend another minute away from you. I don't. (picks up the phone and calls the pilot) Captain Boulder, we're turning this jet around. We're going home... now. (hangs up the phone)
I think I liked it better when dad called.
And eventually, Joe got his ice cream. (Macy walks by to take her two clipboards and puts them in her bag then Stella stands up) But you know tells the story better? Macy. Macy, tell them-- tell them the story.
You just told them the story.
Okay. Oh. We'll tell about the crazy night in Toledo when Kevin got that huge hole in his pants. This one's so funny.
(flatly) One night in Toledo, Kevin ripped a hole in his pants. Stella fixed them. Wow. She's a genious. (walks away from Stella and the fan club)
Macy! What did you say, Macy? Did you just say you can take the fan club on an exclusive tour of the JONAS firehouse? (all gasping)
Okay, you can control my fan club, but you cannot control my mouth, Stella Malone. (Stella stops her from leaving the classroom)
Oh! Did you hear that? Macy's taking us to meet JONAS. (all squealing)
All right, mom are about two hours away.
There’s not enough time. There’s not enough time! There's not enough time!
I'm sorry, Nick. But there’s not enough time.
(beeps) There, problem solved.
And see? The plane's not moving anymore. I think I bought us some valuable time.
Let me explain something to you. The plane still moves in the air even if it doesn't move on the screen, you ding-dong.
Ding-dong?! (scoffs) Well, you're a knucklehead.
Knucklehead? Really, Kevin? Knucklehead?
Guys, stop before somebody else calls somebody a goofball and we all regret it. Nick closes the computer) (the fan club, Stella and Macy enter the house) (fan club screaming) (Kevin, Joe and Nick are pointing the other way then the fan club looks that way but they find that Kevin, Joe and Nick aren't at the living room) (Kevin, Joe and Nick are hiding at the kitchen)
What do you think mom's gonna do first, cry, scream or faint?
Probably all three of them, but we won't be there to see because we'll be dead.
Hey, guys, awesome party. Thanks for the invite. (she and Macy are crawling to the kitchen to hide with Kevin, Joe and Nick)
We're not throwing a party. We're trying to get everyone out of the house.
We've got to get this place cleaned up before mom and dad get home.
Which is in less than two hours.
And before you go there, pausing the little plane on the computer doesn't help. (Nick shakes his head in agreement)
Wait, all you guys need is this place cleaned up? No problem. (stops hiding) Hey, girls! And Fred... (he waves) (points to the floor) See those potato chips on the floor? They're left over from JONAS. (the fan club are looking at the floor) (fan club screaming) (the fan club runs to the
Macy, you are queen of the JONAS heads. Please please please take back the presidency. No offense. I'm just not cut out for this kind of... weird.
Always. (she and Stella rekindle their friendship then they hug) Unless you try to take over my fan club again. (Kevin, Nick and Joe are walking to the other side of the kitchen counter) Then you should probably watch your back.
(holds a plate) Hey, anybody want to scrape off real cheese crust from an actual JONAS plate? (three members of the fan club clean the plate)
Who wants to vacuum the JONAS living room? You get to keep anything you find in the bag. (whirring) (Fred vacuums)
Okay, uh, who wants to help me scrub the bathroom? All right. (rock music playing) (the fan club members are cleaning the kitchen at a fast pace)
(rings loudly) Mom and dad alert! Places! (Kevin, Joe and Nick are putting back everything in their right place) (Tom opens the door for him and Sandy then they enter the house)
Hey, guys, we're back! (Kevin is playing chess with Frankie, Nick is on his guitar and writing a song while Joe is painting a picture)
The place looks spotless, Joe's not a blond. And it looks like Frankie's about to beat Kevin in speed chess. (walks to Kevin and Frankie)
Game. Well, everything, looks normal to me.
Just taking care of business, dad. (puts the guitar on the couch)
(squeals happily) I missed you guys so much. (Kevin, Nick, Joe and Frankie are walking to Sandy) (Sandy happily hugs Kevin, Joe, Nick and
We would’ve been home sooner, but the plane made an unexpected stop.
She doesn’t mean, “In mid-air”.
(tells Tom) See, I told you there was nothing to worry about. (stops hugging then notices the vase) Hey, who moved grandma's vase? (walks to the table) You guys know how fragile this is. (Tom walk to her) (she picks up part of the vase) Grandma's vase. (she hands the top of the vase to Tom) (the bouncer walks by while holding the disco ball) (Frankie pays the bouncer money then leaves)
Did anything happen that we should know about? (Sandy is mad) (he asks Kevin, Joe, Nick and Frankie)
Why do you ask? (four members of the fan club walks by carrying cleaning supplies and leave)
Are you sure there's nothing you'd like to explain to us?
We missed you. (he, Joe and Nick walk to Tom and Sandy to give them a hug)
We missed you too. (zapping) (Kevin, Joe, Nick, Frankie, Sandy and Tom are noticing the electrocuted fridge) (buzzes)
KNKevin and Nick
Joe was in charge! (Joe looks at Kevin and Nick)
We definitely needed this.
And you know what? For the first time, I'm not worried about the boys at all. (Frankie holds a leaf and lets it give Sandy a breeze)
(chuckles) (Joe walks to Sandy and Tom to give beverages to them) Oh, thank you. (takes a beverage from the tray)
(also takes a beverage from the tray) Thank you. Mm. (drinks)
This is delicious. (drinks)
(offers) Braid your hair, ma'am?
Oh, but you know what? A foot massage would be nice. What do you think, hon?
Ooh... Yeah. (agrees) (Kevin, Joe, Nick and Frankie stop what they're doing and four of them kneel down then Joe and Frankie massage sunscreen on Sandy's feet while Kevin and Nick massage sunscreen on Tom's feet)
Why couldn't you just ground us like normal parents? (Kevin shakes his head) (Tom and Sandy toast each other then they drink)
Dad, we’ve got school. How many more letters are there gonna be?
I was going to spell "Coler." As in Robert Lincoln Coler.
The most respected music critic in the business.
(sits) I hate that guy. He's so pedantic, pompous, pretentious.
It looks like someone's been reading their word-of-the-day calendar.
Yeah, well, he loved your last album.
(stands up and walks to Kevin) That Coler? He's so cool. Some would say sagacious.
Kevin Watch you mouth.
It means "shrewd." May 23rd.
Kevin I thought it was impossible to get an interview with that guy.
Yeah, it is. It is, which is why it's so unbelievably awesome I got us an interview!
Kevin No way.
(laughs) Let's celebrate. Five-second dance party. Go. (dance music playing) And we're dancing. Let's dance it.
Mom, dad's dancing again! (tells Sandy)
Come on, you guys. (Kevin, Nick and Joe are going downstairs) All right, we'll do more dancing later. Robert Coler.
Okay okay, you wore me down. You can have your present now. Happy birthday.
Thank you. (takes the present) What is it? Is it chocolate. I bet it's music. Is it a scarf? Two scarves? I totally love scarves. Oh, this is my 10th birthday. (sees the picture) Joe, Nick, Kevin and me, we sat around in our pajamas playing that board game dopey doctor and we drank hot chocolate with those little mini marshmallows in it.
Macy, is this--is this you?
I kind of added myself in. I know I didn't know you guys back then, but if I did, I'd be right there, right?
Oh, thank you so much. I love it.
You're welcome. (Stella puts her present back into the gift bag and stands up with Macy) So... what are the guys doing for your birthday this year.
(picks up her school bag) Oh, well, you know they haven't said anything about it yet.
I'm sure they're throwing an awesome party. So find something great to wear.
Oh, I can't wait. I'm so excited, I can't even sit. (tries to sit but can't) See? (tries to sit again) Nope, not gonna happen.
(enters the atrium) (drumroll) I have a huge surprise for you.
We are gonna remember this day forever.
At 6:00, JONAS has an interview with Robert Lincoln Coler.
He's who? (drumroll stops) I mean, that's great. He's huge.
Yeah, so we need you to come over early and help out with all the wardobe. Kevin thinks we should wear leather vests.
I'm gonna get there early.
Perfect. I've gotta go-- science. You get there late, you have to sit in the front and Mr. Engel’s a spitter. Bye. (runs out of the atrium)
Joe forgot your birthday.
No. No, he didn't. They do this to me every year. They try to psyche me out. Obviously he's throwing me a surprise party.
It's just a birthday. (tries to sit but can't) Okay, maybe a little excited. (both squeal) (Macy and Stella jump then leave the atrium)
(enters then asks Joe) What's this? (points to Joe's award)
Oh, nothing. Just my "Hottie of the Year" award. I've been meaning to hang this thing up for weeks. (continues to wipe his award) (he winks)
And you just decided to put it up right now before the interview?
What are these? (asks Nick about his trophies)
(walks to the awards) Oh, these old things? Just a couple of my songwriting awards. No biggie. (Joe turns) Well, this one a biggie. (bends down and picks up his big award) (grunts) (holds the big award) I got it in first grade-- "Best Melody in an Original Alphabet Song." (doorbell rings)
That must be Stella and Macy. (Nick kisses his big award) I'll get it. (Joe slides down his pole to go downstairs then he walks to open the door)
(sighs) Nick, I cannot believe how self-centered you guys are being.How about we show a little modesty? (unbuttons his vest and shows Nick the award as a necklace) What? I've been getting into hip-hop fashion.
And you just decided to turn your golden shredder award into a necklace?
Word to your mother... who also happens to be my mother. (walks away from Nick) (Nick shakes his head)
Well, thank you, gentlemen. (turns around and talks to Kevin, Joe and Nick) I found you guys quite perspicacious. (shakes Kevin's hand)
(tells Nick and Kevin) That means "insightful." Or was it "to sweat like a cow?" (Robert chuckles and leaves then Joe closes the door) (Stella and Macy are downstairs)
So, I thought that went really great. What are we doing now?
Excellent question, Stella. What are we doing on this very special evening?
I don't know about you guys. But showing my better side all day has got me exhausted. I'm going to bed. Good night, guys. (walks upstairs)
Yeah, I'm wiped. Have a good night, guys. See you soon. (walks upstairs)
Yeah, after even three hours, I'm tired of talking about myself. Oh, wait, I almost forgot. Don't forget your purse. (walks upstairs)
They- they forgot my birthday.
I can’t believe they did that. I’m gonna go yell at them.
No, I don't want you to go yell at them.
Good, 'cause, I could never yell at them. I guess I'll see you tomorrow?
Happy birthday, dear Stella. Happy birthday to you.
Bye. (leaves) (door opens, closes)
Bye. (walks to the table to take her purse) (electricity crackles) (notices the black out) What? (Tom is walking the stairs with a candle) I knew it.
Oh! Hey, Stella. I didn't know you were still here. So, I blew a fuse plugging in my hot comb. (gives Stella the candle) (flashlight clicks) I'll get this fix in a jiff. (walks away and Stella turns around then Tom leaves) (door closes)
Happy... birthday to me. (blows the candle) (door opens) (thudding) Ow! Ouch! (door closes) (the power is on) (Stella opens the door and she has a jacket on her head then she removes it from her head) (leaves)
(turns around) Something on your mind, Macy?
(angry) You know, if I didn’t like you guys so much I wouldn’t like you guys so much. You forgot Stella's birthday.
That's impossible. Her birthday's after Joe's, which is before mine.
The 7th? Which was yesterday! (gasps) Okay, we need to find Stella and apologize immediately.
Oh, she's gonna be really mad.
(puts his arm around Macy) Oh, you know, I think I got it covered. (he and Macy walk away)
(puts her bag on her shoulder) What's-- what's going on? (Joe and Kevin aren't hiding)
(stops hiding) We can't believe we forgot your birthday.
BMBig Man
Hold up. Is that what this is about? You forgot Stella's birthday? You're on your own. (walks away annoyed) (thuds) (Nick picks up his bag)
Guys, it's fine. It's okay. Look, I admit I was a little mad at you last night, but then I started thinking about it and your lives are so busy. I can understand forgetting little things.
You're not a little thing. You're Stella.
How about we throw you a surprise party at the zoo!? Oops, uh, you know what? We’re gonna do that next year. (Nick shakes his head) I’m just gonna stop talking now.
Or we can celebrate the way we did when we were little kids-- drink hot cocoa and play board games in our pajamas.
How do you always know exactly what I want? Okay, I'm giving you guys one more chance. I know how busy you are. Sometimes you have to stop being rockstars.
Okay, pajama party it is.
Oh, and I'll take a rain check on the zoo...Unless it's the London zoo. I mean, you are rockstars. (Stella walks towards Kevin, Joe and Nick then they walk away from the atrium while Kevin and Stella put their arms on each other)
