Welcome planetary conversion team! Welcome to Blorch, the latest addition to the Irken Empire, and most importantly, the first planet to fall victim to our latest effort at universal conquest, Operation Impending Doom II!
Truly I am amazing. How could they not cheer the very sight of my progress? Still, I am becoming impatient with my incredibly subtle infiltration of this planet, and am growing ever hungrier to be the destruction of the humans. Destruction is nice!
I have a good feeling about this lead, I can almost taste the humans being destroyed, IT'S DELICIOUS! This Mars holds the key, I just know it! New words of praise will have to be invented just so they can p- GET OFF MY HEAD!
Oh! Yes. That! You heard wrong! This time I was trying to get rid of Mars. You know, just a little warm up before I destroy the humans! Yeah, see, I'll do Earth next! I'm an unstoppable death machine, you know.