[Meredith's intern for the day Shane Ross knocks on the door of the on-call room while she and Derek are having a quickie]
DerekRoss?
Sorry to bother you, sir, but I was hoping to scrub in with you today, and I'm supposed to be on Dr. Grey's service. So I was wondering - if maybe you could talk to your wife for me.
[seethes] I'm gonna kill him. [flings open the door] No, Ross, he cannot talk to his wife for you, because you are with me, and we have a consult with a pregnant lady with abdominal pain. So go do the workup, and I will see you there. [slams the door]
[Meredith kisses Derek a few times and rushes off]
Derek
[grins to himself] Ahhh...I am liking the stupid hormones.
Jackson Avery really has a bigger say than any of us in running this hospital?
That can't be true. Can it?
Derek
Well, he's a voting member of the management team and he also represents the Harper Avery Foundation.
And their $175 million bucks.
As opposed to our $15 million apiece.
Derek
According to Stan, not only does he have the deciding vote, he can veto ours.
That is ridiculous. He's a fellow.
But he's a plastics fellow. And I'm me.
Well, you should be staring at my wife. [points to Arizona]
No. It's her leg. She's wearing high heels. Because she has a sexy high-heel leg that makes her ass go pow. [Arizona shakes her butt]
Derek
Wow.
[to Jackson, Derek and Richard, who are looking embarrassed] Come on, guys. You can comment, too. You have permission. It's the one time in your life you can say it and not be gross.
Well, I think it's a fine gluteal––
[points at Richard] Oh, no.
[Shane is freaking out in the OR]
Derek
I went out to the Hoh River to fish winter steelhead. For hours, I tried to cast like I'd practiced. But if you over try, it'll never happen. And then just once, the rod loaded perfectly. The line formed a tight loop and the fly just danced out over the river about seventy feet. It had a life of its own. See, the key was to relax, feel the rhythm and let the rod do the work. Just one perfect cast.
Derek
Did it calm you down?
Derek
Right now I am about to remove a hematoma from Broca's area and if I am not careful, she'll never speak again. There is a lot to be afraid of. Patients will be afraid. Parents will be afraid. And the only way to get through it is for you to stay calm.
Derek
[to the rambunctious younger brother of a patient] Hey, listen to me. Your sister needs rest today. You want to know why? 'Cause we opened up her head and we put magic inside. So I'd be nice to her if I were you, 'cause she has special powers. You understand? [the boy nods] That's what I'm talking about.
He put a vampire in her head. I'd watch out, kid.
Derek
Oh, damn it. The CSF is leaking. This is worse than I thought. The crack has torn the dura.
Derek
"Grody" is not a thing we say. List the possible complications.
Um, death, that's pretty solid. Strokes, re-clots, being a potato, goofiness, loopiness, simpletonism.
Derek
[annoyed] Brooks.
Difficulty with speech, memory, and vision. Why are you making me talk so much today?
Derek
Because you're weird, and it bugs me. But you also have a natural talent for this. And the weirdness is there because you're covering up a real lack of confidence in your natural talent. So now it is my job to make you feel confident and less weird. Ok?
Whatever twists your knickers.
[Meredith walks into Derek's office to find him reciting his speech to baby Bailey, who is in his car seat]
I went up to daycare to find my son missing.
Derek
Yeah, I needed an audience. Look, sit down. Let me go over this again with you, okay?
Oh, no, no, no. I've heard that speech so many times I could do it myself. Stop boring our son.
Derek
Is it boring? I have 50 scientists from around the world coming here today. It's got to be charming. It's a big deal.
I know it's a big deal, which is why I will get out of your way.
Derek
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm. [takes car seat] And I'm taking my son with me because I don't want his first word to be hypothalamus. [kisses Derek]
Derek
There are worse first words.
[looks at a scan Derek is analyzing] Is that a spinal schwannoma?
Derek
It is.
Extended into the retropleural space?
Derek
Mm-hmm.
[excitedly] Is that for me?
Derek
[smirks] We're overdue for a date. OR 3, you in fresh scrubs, me in a ferry-boat scrub cap. You in?
Well, this could take hours. What about the kids?
Derek
Amy's with them.
We have a babysitter named Amy?
Derek
Amy, my sister.
Derek
She's a recovering addict, and she loves kids.
I've only been gone a day.
Derek
The tumor involves the great vessels.
[smiles] I know what you're doing.
Derek
[smiles] Mm-hmm.
Derek
Mm-hmm.
Derek
I took the job.
And you were supposed to be stepping back! You said "Take this year and make it count. And I'll make sure you can do it." And you lied!
Derek
I'm sorry. I lied. It's a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.
So you got this thing and I gave up that piece, and I found a way to make it work, with my job, my kids, and my research with less help from you and I did it!
Derek
You're not a victim. I'm killing myself as much as you are!
And then you wanted more and more pieces! And now this is just too much. You can't just drag us away so I can live in your shadow!
Derek
You have a job, you could be working in James Madison.
Right, and that's how my father got his first job here. They wanted my mom, so she had to call the University and pulled some strings and find something for Thatcher to do! It's all how the trailing starts.
Derek
This isn't like that.
This is exactly that! And it's not what I signed up for.
Derek
You know, you're being selfish!
Well, I have to be, Derek, because you believe that your career is more important than mine.
Derek
Well, at this moment in time it is!
No, not in this moment, always! You will always be that hot-shot doctor and I will always be that young intern that fell in love with you.
Derek
That's how you see yourself. That's your problem, I can't do anything to fix that.
That's not how I see myself; that is the issue here!
Derek
D.C., you can do your surgeries, you can do your research, you can do the portal veins, there is nothing here that you can't do there.
But I don't want to! We're not just talking about my job Derek, We're talking about my life. I grew up here, I made my family here, I helped rebuild the hospital here that has my sister's name on it, my mother's name, my name! I live here, my life is here, I'm staying here. I don't want to leave.
Derek
You're asking me to choose between this job and my family?
I am simply saying I am not going anywhere. I am staying here.
Derek
He's family, and this is one of the reasons why you didn't want to leave Seattle in the first place, remember? You have family here, roots.
Derek
What?
I have to have dinner with the sister I don't know and the bio-dad she hates because you gave up your chance to work for Obama?! You're gonna play that card? Of course you are because you'll be playing that card until the end of freaking time!
Derek
Time-out.
No, I am so sick of your passive-aggressive...
Derek
Time-out. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that. I am just trying to help out here. I'm trying to help you, and I am trying to help them. I come from a big family. It's crazy, it's messy, but it's good, and I want that for you. I want you to have that. She's your sister, and he's practically your father. And Zola needs more black people in the family because I'm running out of ways to braid her hair and Bailey won't show me any more.
Derek
I don't know who I am anymore. Not anybody I ever thought I'd be. I try and make the right choices for Meredith, the kids, you. And, um... I'm angry all the time. I'm miserable, and I don't know what to do with it. All I do is hurt people. The last people I want to hurt, and I just... I just can't get control of it. I don't know what to do anymore.
I know how you feel. We call it rock bottom.
Grey's Anatomy · 1,393 quotes
