Britney with the umbrella!...Posh Spice in America!
“Bad News Blair” · Season 1, Episode 4
In this episode: Chuck Bass (4), Gossip Girl (4), Blair Waldorf (3), Serena van der Woodsen (2), Nate Archibald (2), Dan Humphrey (1), Rufus Humphrey (1)
Hey, Upper East Siders, there's nothing Gossip Girl likes more than a surprise. And we hear Blair Waldorf got a two-for-one special: her mom, Eleanor, who has just returned from Paris, and Serena van der Woodsen... brunch buddies.
Doesn't Chuck know that a party isn't a party until someone crashes?
Is that a smile we see on B's lips? The spotlight is on her, for once, and S actually helped her get it. I guess miracles can happen.
What are you doing here? [Referring to Dan] Do I smell pork... and cheese? [To Serena] Okay, well, when you're done with your charity work, why don't you come find me?
[To Serena's voice mail] Maybe we should crash the shoot, anyway. See who they replaced me with. Make fun of that skinny bitch.
I dated a girl like Serena, once. Actually, a lot like Serena. And girls like that might be challenging. That's true. And they're complicated, and enigmatic. And usually worth it. And the only way you know for sure is to jump it with both feet.
What happened with you?
I swam for a while. Till I drowned.
Oh. Well, thanks, dad. That's a great story.
I'm sorry. You were right.
I know.
When I got that call, I should have known you had nothing to do with it. I know I should have never pushed you to do this whole thing in the first place.
Actually, I'm glad you pushed me. It ended up being a very important day for me. I just thought it was going to be more fun.
I know, me too.
Spotted -- Lonely Boy's rude awakening. Upper East Side Queens aren't born at the top. They climb their way up in heels, no matter who they have to tread on to do it.
This just then, S and B committing a crime of fashion. Who doesn't love a five fingers discount, especially if one of those fingers is the middle one... Everyone knows you can't choose your family but you can choose you friends. And in a world ruled by bloodlines and bank accounts, it pays to have a pal. As much as a BFF can make you go WTF, there's no denying we'd all be a little less rich without them. And Serena and Blair? They do best friends better than anyone. No, that's not a tear in my eye, it's just allergies. Without you, I'm nothing. Gossip Girl
[On Carter Baizen] Anyone who trades their trust fund for a fanny pack flies in the face of all that is holy to Chuck Bass.
[Hosting a lost weekend] You've lived through Ivy League! And hopefully gained entry to the college of your choice. Now, let's ruin those chances. Let me remind you of the rules. As of this moment, there is no outside world that I do not show you. You eat what I provide, practice what I preach, and till I say so, the only girls you talk to are the ones I've paid for. Let the lost weekend commence.
CCarter
Once you turn away from money you see that it doesn't buy you freedom, it pays for your prison. They say I disappeared, but all I did was break out.
So where'd you go?
CCarter
Where didn't I? I did cleanup post Katrina, spent a year rebuilding Manchu Pichu, which let me tell you, changed my life. I bought at HD cam and started filming if for a documentary-
You're the guy who gave us our first joint, snuck us into our first club and you're gonna tell me the life of a YouTube filmaker is better than this. You invented the Lost Weekend.
Who cares about a party when you can travel the world? [Chuck scoffs]
CCarter
Exactly, in the real world, all that matters is who you are. Not what you own.
As much as I love the speech about not needing material things from a guy who has that much product in his hair, this party is about excess, not exposition. Stop talking, start partying.
It's exactly what he [Carter] said. The money, the drugs, the privileges, they're just keeping us numb, so we don't notice it's better out there in the real world.
The real world? Everyone out there wants to be us. We are what you aspire to, not run away from.
[Scoffs] You really don't get me do you?
That dream of yours, what is it really? Cause I hear you talk about how you don't wanna go to Dartmouth and how you don't wanna follow in your father's footsteps, but what exactly do you want?
All I know is it's not this.
Well you better discover what it is before you throw everything away trying to find it.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Gossip Girl pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.