Ow!
Luke, are you okay?
Stupid box! Stupid lamp!
Hey Luke, are you being attacked by your possessions again?
“Lost and Found” · Season 2, Episode 15
In this episode: Lorelai Gilmore (4), Jess Mariano (3), Luke Danes (2), Rory Gilmore (1)
[Jess and Luke are searching for an apartment.]
Forget it!
Why? What was wrong with it?
It was pink!
We can paint it.
You mean I can paint it.
We can paint it together.
Great! Then we can hold hands and skip afterwards.
Fine. Which one did you like?
The one before.
The one with the two fridges?
No.
Well, the one before was the one with two fridges.
No, the one we saw before was the one with the cat!
I hate cats!
Well, I don't think the cat came with the place.
Yeah, but it had carpeting which means it's always gonna smell like a cat.
(shrugs) Clean the carpet.
Paint the pink.
Fine. The one next to the bank.
Nah, too many windows.
What?
Six windows, all on one side, three o'clock in the afternoon, we're sittin' in an oven.
So we get curtains.
Well, you'd have to help me put them up.
Great! Then we can hold hands and skip afterwards.
Stop saying that!
[Jess enters Lorelai's kitchen for a break from cleaning the gutters on her house, and she offers him Chinese takeout leftovers.]
So, umm... basically, uh, everything here is chicken. You got... garlic chicken, Kung Pao chicken, Szechuan chicken, chicken in brown sauce, which looks and tastes remarkably like the Szechuan chicken, except it's got these red peppers in it, and if you eat them, you die. Plate?
Uh, I'd thought I, uh... (motioning to his filthy hands)
Oh, soap's on the counter.
So when was the last time you had those gutters cleaned?
It's been a while.
Yeah, I found an "I Like Ike" bumper sticker up there.
(giggles) Is it really bad?
Well, it won't be by tomorrow.
(hands him a spoon for his plate) I like hearing that!
So, you guys aren't too hot on vegetables, huh?
What are you talking about? There's green pepper in the Kung Pao.
My mistake.
So, are you a healthy eater like Luke?
No... no one's a healthy eater like Luke; Euell Gibbons wasn't a healthy eater like Luke!
Wow... it's been AGES since I've a good "Euell Gibbons" reference!
Many parts of the pine tree ARE edible.
I think I have gangrene.
You do not.
And vertigo.
Oh boy.
And one leg suddenly feels shorter than the other.
This is gonna be the Vanity Fair paper cut incident all over again, isn’t it?
[After Jess has finished cleaning the gutters on the roof, Lorelai walks out assuming he took Rory's bracelet.]
You leaving?
Yeah, all done.
You weren’t gonna come get your money?
Ah, I figured I’d get it eventually. It’s not like I don’t know where you guys live.
(chuckles) That’s true. You certainly do know where we live. Well here. (hands him the money he made for cleaning the gutters.) After all, you earned it.
Thanks.
You took it, didn’t you?
Excuse me?
Rory’s bracelet; you had it the whole time.
No idea what you’re talking about.
How’d you get it?
I didn’t get anything.
What, did you break into our house, you got all dressed in black and pulled a Mission: Impossible?
Actually, I came down the chimney and pulled a Santa Claus.
Very funny.
Thought a ridiculous accusation deserved a ridiculous response.
So it’s just a great big ol’ coincidence that I catch you coming out of Rory’s room a half an hour before she mysteriously finds the bracelet under her bed?
Guess so.
Why would you do this?
I gotta go.
I mean, I know you hate the world, but I thought you liked Rory.
I didn't do anything.
Bull.
(scoffs) Whatever.
Oh, don’t "whatever" me, you little jerk! You let Rory run around completely panicked, thinking she lost her boyfriend’s bracelet. She was miserable, do you understand that?!
I didn't take it!
I’m sure you’re jealous of Dean because he’s great and Rory’s madly in love with him, but you taking the bracelet didn’t hurt Dean, it hurt Rory. That bracelet is the most precious thing she owns. She never takes it off. It means everything to her, and you stealing it was unbelievably cruel!
The "most precious thing she owns"?
Yes!
If it’s the "most precious thing she owns", why did it take her TWO WEEKS to figure out it was gone, huh?! (Lorelai is dumbfounded) You might wanna re-evaluate how madly in love she is. I wouldn’t start calling him "son" yet.
Get outta here!
You read my mind. (walks off)
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