Ross and Phoebe in “The One with the Sharks”

And I ended up telling him that...

What?

You had a six-year-long relationship with a guy named Vikram.

What? Why?

Well, he seemed to... bum hard when I told him that you'd never been in a serious relationship.

If you hadn't just had a baby with my best friend, I swear to Lucifer, a rabid dog would be feasting on your danglers right now!