Fillmore! quotes

I was just on my may to class when the hallway started to reek so very badly...

Fillmore

Some room! I practically spent my first two months of school here... 'Til that is, my former partner Wayne drafted me out of delinquency and into the safety patrol. You're lying, Ingrid. You didn't do it, and I can prove it.

Ingrid

So what? Listen. They're gonna expell me, and I want out. Why would I wanna stay here?

Fillmore

I have an ATM tape that proves you weren't anywhere near the school when the stink bomb went off!

Ingrid

And I have an eggplant that looks like Fred Durst! Did you hear me? I don't care. I just wanna forget you people!

Fillmore

Don't say "you people"! Because THIS person's been out there, busting his tail trying to clear YOUR name. And what do I get in return? a messed up eggplant. (Ingrid smiles) Well, what's that?! Joan of Arc cracked a smile! Ingrid, you didn't do it. Don't take the fall because of a hundred fools who want easy answers! You got a friend at X, me.

Ingrid

...You know. I was thinking, if one person other than the Welcome Wagon Girl is the least bit nice to me by two o' clock? I wouldn't confess to doing something I didn't do.

Fillmore

I would've been here earlier, but... I was busy trying to clear a friend's name. Cornelius Fillmore.

Ingrid

Ingrid Third.

Fillmore

Are you reading those files?

Ingrid

Yeah, photographic memory... This school, you got kids with slingshots, baseball card sharks, test paper peddlers... But you don't have any rebels.

Fillmore

That's why you've gotta stick around.

By Don King's hair, that's her!

Ingrid

How dare you bring a "Dancey Lads" pin into my house!

Fillmore

Locked!... Where did you learn how to pick-

Ingrid

You know how my records list that I spent a year in Nepal? They didn't say that I was at a reform school. What? I didn't think it was pertinent to your investigation.

Fillmore

What were you in for?

Ingrid

A number of things... Including an incident with a stink bomb and a piñata.

Fillmore

You're right. It wasn't pertinent.

Book her, Cornelius!

Fillmore

A tripod couldn't represent like you just did, O'Farrell. Remember that.

The corn! It all looks the same!

I SAY! That LASS is STEALING my SCOOT-AH!

Vallejo

Uh...Fillmore...please tell me that's not my bike.

Fillmore

It doesn't work that way, Minna. There aren't enough brief yet effective hunger strikes in the world to justify what you've done. You're a criminal.

Yeah? So are you. (Jumps from the branch to the rooftop and has his escape routes cut off by Ingrid, then O'Farrell and Tehama)

Fillmore

(Lands on the roof) No. I'm a safety patroller, and I'm bringing you down.

If loving Checkmatey is a crime, then I plead guilty in the first degree!

Yeah! Checkmatey's in the house!

I am the one who will leave you defeated, silent, listening to the lamentations of your kin!