Fargo Season 1 quotes

Peggy Blumquist

It's just a flyin' saucer, Ed. We gotta go.

Mike Milligan

Sovereignty is absolute power and authority.

Like a king?

Mike Milligan

Exactly. Which is who I am - your king.

Uh, it's America, brother. We don't do kings.

Mike Milligan

Oh, we do. We do. We just call them something else. See, today is my coronation day. And on coronation day, I've always believed a new king should start his reign with an act of kindness.

Right on.

Mike Milligan

And an act of cruelty. That way, your subjects know that you're capable of both - God and monster.

Camus says knowin' we're gonna die makes life absurd.

Well, I don't know who that is. But I'm guessing he doesn't have a 6-year-old girl.

He's French.

Ugh, I don't care if he's from Mars. Nobody with any sense would say something that foolish. We're put on this earth to do a job. And each of us gets the time we get to do it. And when this life is over and you stand in front of the Lord... Well, you try tellin' Him it was all some Frenchman's joke.

Lou Solverson

I was there at the end, you know? After the war, when Saigon fell, on the USS Kirk patrolling the coast. And when the country went, it went fast. And we had, like, you know, 24 hours to get everybody out. And not just Americans, but our allies, the South Vietnamese, all packed onto boats and helicopters. We stood on the deck and waved them in. And one by one, they'd land, unload, and then we'd push the whirlybirds into the sea. The damndest thing. But then, this Chinook comes. And those things - you can't just land one on a ship this size. So we wave them off. But the pilot's got his whole family inside, and he's running out of fuel, so it's now or never. So he hovers over the deck. People start jumping - scared or not - onto the ship. There's a baby - literally a-a tiny baby and the mother just - just drops him. And one of my boys like catching a ball, just sticks out his hands. So, now everybody's out, and I'm thinking, "How the heck is this pilot"- right? - "How's he gonna get out?" But he maneuvers off the port bow, and he hovers there for the longest time doing, you know, what we learned later - uh, takin' off his flight suit. And somehow he rolls the bird on its side, and just before it hits the water, he jumps. 6,000 pounds of angry helicopter parts flyin' all around him. And somehow he makes it. How'd he do that?

Peggy Blumquist

What are you sayin'?

Lou Solverson

Your husband, he said he was gonna protect his family no matter what. And I acted like I didn't understand, but I do. It's the rock we all push - men. We call it our burden, but it's really our privilege.

Peggy Blumquist

I never meant for any of this to happen. You know? Not to Ed. Not to anybody. I just wanted to be someone.

Lou Solverson

Well, you're somebody now.

What'll you do then, I wonder? Join a-a new empire?

Hanzee Dent

Maybe start one of my own.

So that it, too, may one day collapse and fall into the sea. Do I take it you'll try to get revenge on Kansas City, apprehend those responsible? 'Cause you can bet Kansas City will be heavily guarded.

Hanzee Dent

Not apprehend. Dead. Don't care "heavily guarded". Don't care "into the sea". Kill and be killed. Head in a bag.

We are not here to tell stories, we are here to tell the truth.

No tip?

Ya. Get a real job.

Nikki Swango

You're the hand and I'm the glove.

You're the bottle and I'm the beer.

Nikki Swango

Or the beer and the glass in my case.

Oh yeah, but I mean it comes in--

Nikki Swango

No, I know. Yeah. Simpatico.

Sy Feltz

It's, see your firm, Narwhal, like I said last year, we borrowed a hefty sum. And I know you're not bona fide FDIC, but I mean, unless you boys do business differently in... Where you from?

America.

Nikki Swango

Ray, there's a man in my bathroom.

Let's not jump to any conclusions.

Nikki Swango

Are you saying he's not a man or he's not in my bathroom?

You borrowed $1,000,000 from a man without knowing his first name.

I know how it -

It's not a question. I'm just assessing the level of stupidity.

Are they with you?

Surmise.

What?

Because we arrived together, we are together. Surmise.

Well, are ya?

Yes.

Gloria Burgle

The old way works just fine. Type out a report, send it via telex.

Moe Dammick

You do know what year it is, right? The future. We don't use - Who uses telexes anymore?

Gloria Burgle

So that's why no one ever writes me back.

Nikki Swango

So, even if they wanted to solve it, the police, what possible solve is there, besides unfathomable pinheadery?

There. There you go. Now you're seeing it. The inescapable reality. You're trapped. Don't look so sad. By the time we're done, you'll be billionaires. On paper, at least.