Kat Hernandez quotes from Euphoria

Kat

[V.O.] What I realized is that, like, my whole life, all I’ve tried to do is take up less space. Tried to hide from guys who might whisper to their friend under their breath as I walked by. I spent my whole life afraid people were gonna find out that I was fat. But honestly, who gives a shit? There's nothing more powerful than a fat girl who doesn't give a fuck.

Maddy

Do you think people are, like, one hundred percent straight? Or one hundred percent gay?

Kat

No, 'cause obviously there's, like, bi people, asexual, pan. Sexuality is like a spectrum, you know?

Maddy

Yeah. Totally.

Kat

Why?

Maddy

I don't know. Do you think straight guys ever, like, watch gay porn?

Kat

Not if they're a hundred percent straight.

Maddy

You just said it's a spectrum.

Kat

Yeah, on either side of the spectrum is gay and straight.

Maddy

I fucking hate this.

Kat

Is this about Nate?

Maddy

No. He's, like, super straight.

Kat

Is it about your dad?

Maddy

No.

Kat

It would explain why they're fighting.

Maddy

It's not about any guy that I know.

Kat

All I know is that most guys are, like, weird, gross, and fucking pathetic.

Kat

I think I'm gonna get really fucked up tonight.

Jules

Same.

Kat

[chuckling] Cool.

Rue

[V.O.] The only other time I'd ever seen Jules drink was the night of McKay's party. It's not like I'm a drag and want everyone to be sober around me. It's just, something felt off.

Kat

Tequila makes me aggressive.

Jules

[groans] Tequila makes me wanna dance.

Rue

I–I once took, like, ten Vicodin, and drank an entire thing of tequila, and then I, like, blacked out for three days. But while I was blacked out, I still went to school and did homework and shit. It was really weird.

Kat

Well, let's not do that tonight.

Rue

I won't. I'm... I'm clean, so we're good. [chuckles]

Jules

Wait a minute. I was supposed to be your chaperone... but now I'm drunk.

Rue

I don't, like, actually need a chaperone.

Jules

Oops.

Ethan

Can I ask you a question?

Kat

Sure.

Ethan

Like, um... What happened the night of the carnival? 'Cause I feel like it felt like we were, like, having a lot of fun when we were, like, hanging out. And then you just kinda, like, disappeared.

Kat

What is, like, your weird fascination with me? I don't get it.

Ethan

What? I don't have a weird fascination with you.

Kat

Okay. Say we hung out that night. And then what?

Ethan

Um, I... I don't know. And then we would, like, hang out again.

Kat

Ethan, why would we hang out again?

Ethan

'Cause we, like, enjoyed hanging out?

Kat

Ethan, if you want me to suck your dick or fuck you, just say it, but... stop acting like we'll be boyfriend and girlfriend, because the chances of that happening are, like, literally zero.

Kat

[to Cassie] I don't know what you're gonna say, but this feels like... really dramatic.

Yeah, this is spooky.

Cassie

It is not spooky, BB. I just–I need your advice on, like, two things. And I need you guys to promise me not to say a single fucking word. So, the night of Daniel's Halloween party, something happened.

Maddy

Wait, am I hearing this correctly? You wanna tell McKay that you made out with Daniel at the carnival and on Halloween?

Cassie

Yeah, but, I don't... I don't have to say it's Daniel.

Maddy

Bitch, that's the craziest idea I've ever heard. [looks over at Kat and BB] Right?

For sure.

Cassie

Yeah, but I wanna be honest with him.

Maddy

You cannot tell McKay.

Cassie

But it's not like I cheated-cheated.

Maddy

Kissing is worse. It's so much more intimate. And if anybody brings it up, you deny, deny, deny.

Cassie

Okay, but, I just don't want there to be something this bad between us forever.

Kat

I wouldn't worry about it. It's not like you guys are gonna be together forever.

Maddy

Kat, what the fuck is your problem? You're being a bad friend now. You were a bad friend to me, and this whole new personality is seriously unlikable.

World Star!

Kat

Why, because I won't sit and listen to you bitch and moan about your psychotic, abusive boyfriend who you've literally broken up with a thousand times?

Maddy

It was literally the lowest point in my life, so yeah. That and the fact that you're just fucking mean.

Kat

Maddy, ever since I've met you, all you talk about is yourself. Your clothes, your boyfriends, whatever superficial shit you think is so fucking important. Sorry I'm no longer interested.

Maddy

I don't know about everyone else, but I miss the old Kat. You know, the one who had a sense of humor and wasn't a fucking cunt?

[beat] Damn.

Lexi

[to Cassie] What was the other thing?

Cassie

What other thing?

Lexi

You said you needed advice on two things.

Cassie

I don't remember. What would you do?

Lexi

Um, I don't know. I've never really been in a situation where two guys have been interested in me.

Cassie

That's 'cause you're shy.

Lexi

I guess so, but I've also never been in a situation where I've been interested in two guys.

Cassie

That's also 'cause you're shy.

Lexi

Maybe.

Cassie

But if you were in my situation, what would you do?

Lexi

Honestly, I don't think I would say anything.

Cassie

What if not saying something makes you feel really bad?

Lexi

Worse than saying it?

Cassie

Yeah.

Lexi

Well, then, I don't think you have any other option.

Cassie

What if these are, like, the big moments in life? Like, my mom always talks about how high school was like this big, monumental part of her life. But I cannot imagine being 40 and looking back at this, like, "Wow."

Maddy

Yeah, but that's because most people peak in high school.

Kat

I definitely haven't peaked, so...

Lexi

I feel like I'm not even a person yet.

Cassie

Yeah, I'm definitely at, like, 25 percent peakness.

Jules

I feel like I'm at a hundred. But I can definitely get to 150.

Rue

Honestly, I never thought I'd make it this far.

Cassie

What do you mean?

Rue

I don't know. I just always had, like, this overwhelming anxiety that something bad would happen.

Maddy

In all fairness, last summer, there were, like, three weeks where I thought you were dead.

Jules

Okay, but she's been sober for, like, three months.

Maddy

[to Rue] Weren't you in rehab, like, six months ago?

Rue

Uh, yeah. [chuckles]

Maddy

I feel like I would look so sexy pregnant.

Kat

Maddy, please do not get pregnant.

Maddy

I wouldn't wear any of those nasty maternity clothes. I would just be me, plus pregnant.

Remember when I got pregnant?

Maddy

Yes, and it would be nothing like that.

[to Kat] Well, speaking of baby daddies, I seen the photo that Ethan posted to you. It's cute as fuck.

Maddy

Yeah, Kat, stop flaunting your healthy, non-abusive, wonderful relationship. It's actually triggering.

Kat

Yeah, he's um, really sweet.

Rue

[V.O.] Ethan made plans with Kat to go bowling that night. Kat was depressed because she couldn’t figure out why she didn’t love Ethan. So she decided to make a list of pros and cons. But she couldn’t think of anything, which made her realize Ethan might not be the problem.

Kat

Mmm... [mimics shooting herself in the head and falls aside]

Rue

[V.O.] Kat hated herself. But the problem with hating yourself is you can’t really talk about it. Because at some point recently, the whole world joined a self-help cult and won’t shut the fuck up about it.

[in an online tutorial video] It’s not gonna solve all your life problems, but it is gonna solve... [Kat closes laptop]

[standing in bathroom doorway] Kat. You’re one of the bravest, most beautiful human beings I have ever seen.

Kat

[with her mouth full] That’s not true.

Yes, it is. I wish I had your confidence.

Kat

But I don’t, like... feel healthy.

Yes, you are.

Kat

No, like... seriously. I’m not.

Kat, you just have to love yourself.

Kat

But that’s what I’m trying to tell you! I fucking hate myself!

Every day you get out of bed... it’s an act of courage.

Kat

That’s easy for you to say. You don’t have, like, fucking mental problems.

Yes, I do. Why do you think I look like this?

Kat

Are you kidding? I wish my mental problems made me look like you.

Trust me, you don’t

Kat

Trust me, I do! You’re like the most beautiful person I’ve ever fucking seen.

Maybe by a white, cis-male, heteronormative standard.

Kat

[lies in bed and covers face with pillow] Oh, my God! Are you fucking joking?!

[rips pillow off and yells] Kat! Are you fucking serious?! That’s not you fucking talking! It’s the patriarchy!

Kat

It is me talking! You are not listening!

No! Society puts things into your mind!

Kat

I don’t care about society! I feel like shit!

Kat, you need to smash all beauty standards!

Kat

But I can’t even get out of bed!

You have to love yourself.

You need to find your inner fuckin’ warrior!

Become a bad bitch!

Just like you did last year!

Kat

But that wasn’t even real.

It looked real.

Kat

That was the point!

I found it inspiring.

Kat

[gets up out of bed] Shut the fuck up!

[chanting, repeatedly swarming and following Kat] Love yourself!

Kat

[goes into the bathroom, shouts with influencers following her, shouting and pointing] Leave me alone! Get the fuck out!

Kat

Fuck.

[loitering in hallway with Rue] That’s a good-ass plan.

Rue

Thank you. Fuckin’ Fez didn’t even wanna hear it.

Why not?

Rue

Ego shit, man. [to Lexi in hallway putting up flyers over the official "Oklahoma" play production calling for auditions of her original play also entitled Oklahoma] Yo, Lex, what're you doin'?

Lexi

Oh, just putting up fliers for this play I'm doing.

Rue

What play? [V.O.] The only thing is... Lexi hadn't told anyone about the play... including Cassie.

Lexi

I'd actually love for you to read it. [aloud] Yeah, for sure. Just, uh, send it to me. [enters washroom]

Cassie

[enters washroom] Hey, Rue-Rue.

Rue

Hi, Cass. Wait, are you in the play?

Cassie

What play?

Rue

Lexi's play.

Cassie

What do you mean, Lexi's play?

Rue

Uh, the play that Lexi wrote.

Lexi

"Oklahoma".

Cassie

What?

Rue

The play's called "Oklahoma"?

Lexi

No, the drama club's doing "Oklahoma."

Cassie

Oh my god. Do I look like I'm in "Oklahoma"?

Rue

Why would your play be set in Oklahoma?

Cassie

[facing Rue with Lexi making a slash throat (meaning; stop talking) gesture behind her] You thought I was auditioning for "Oklahoma"?

Rue

I haven't read it, so...

Cassie

[Lexi frantically makes waving gestures (meaning; PLEASE stop talking) behind her] Are you making fun of me, or did you actually think I was auditioning for "Oklahoma"?

Maddy

[walks up with Kat] Why the fuck would you audition for "Oklahoma"?

Cassie

I'm not!

Maddy

Then why the fuck do you look like you're auditioning for "Oklahoma"?

Cassie

Do I?

Kat

Yes.

Cassie

Has everyone read "Oklahoma" but me?

Kat

"Oklahoma"'s not like a play you read.

Cassie

Rue, are you on drugs?

Rue

Yes.

Kat

You relapsed?

Cassie

Wait, what?!

Rue

Oh, I've just... nah, I've just been smokin' a little bit of weed.

Kat

Wait, I don't understand. If you're not auditioning for "Oklahoma," then why do you look like that?

Cassie

Like what?!

Maddy

Like a country music star.

Cassie

In a good way or a bad way?

Maddy

Bitch, you better be joking. Are you okay, Cass?

Cassie

No! Yes, fuck it! I am in love with Nate Jacobs and he is in love with me! And don't you fucking give me that look, Maddy, because I didn't fuck your boyfriend! You two were broken up for three weeks and three days before we even had sеx, so I didn't betray you! Plus, you guys are terrible for each other and you know I'm right and you guys can all judge me [turns head over left shoulder to Rue then back at Maddy and Kat] if you want, but I do not care! I have never, ever been happier!

Rue

[V.O.] But she didn't say that. In fact, it was much weirder. She just stared straight ahead like she's doing now and didn't say a word.

Rue

[V.O.] Now, Nate didn’t know what happened with Cassie and Maddy because when he exercises, he puts his phone on silent.

Rue

[V.O.] It wasn’t the 38 missed calls from Cassie that concerned him. It was the fact that there were zero calls from Maddy. Part of the reason Nate loved Maddy as much as he did is because she was loyal. But it’s also what scared the living shit out of him. If anyone crossed her, she’d bury them... and he had now really fucking crossed her. And there was no doubt in Nate’s mind what Maddy was about to do.

Maddy

[to Kat on the phone] You know when a kid shoots up a school and they go to interview the parents, and the parents are like, "We had no idea. He seemed, like, totally normal." And everyone watching is like, "You’re a fucking idiot." That’s how I feel, but with Cassie.

Kat

Look, I never trusted her.

Maddy

What? Why?

Kat

Because she seems like the kind of person who would fuck your boyfriend.

Maddy

[sighs] I think I actually wanna murder her.

Kat

I get it.

Maddy

No, like, actually plan a murder and carry it out.

Kat

I get it.

Maddy

Like a grisly murder. One that shocks the nation.

Kat

[casually] I think that's more than understandable.

Maddy

Open the fucking door, Cassie! Open the door and tell me it was worth it! You owe me that! [tries opening the closet door] Open the fucking door, Cassie! What kind of fucking friend are you? What the fuck?! [pause] This isn't about Nate. This is about you and me and our friendship. And if you wanna throw it away, then fine. 'Cause I don't wanna be fucking friends with you.

Kat

Come here, babe. Let it go.

Maddy

I'm just sick of it. I'm sick of it. He put me through hell and now he's with my fucking best friend? Like, what the fuck?!

Kat

It's fuckеd up.

Maddy

When is it gonna end?

Kat

It's fuckеd up.

Maddy

[to Cassie] Open the fucking door, Cassie! Open the fucking door!

Kat

She's not gonna open it. Let's just go.

Maddy

Open the door! [bangs on the door]

Kat

Maddy, come on.

Maddy

[to Cassie] You're a fucking coward. You're a fucking coward, and I would've never done this to you! I would've never done this to you!