STOP THE CAR!
No time for donkey potty!
Not that. [points to the white sewer gator up ahead] THAT!
All S1
S1 E15Unfinished Business
[after the Rivera-mobile is destroyed when they reach the finish line and win the race] Goodnight, sweet prince, and flights of-- Hey, a quarter!
Battle stations, Suárez. It's time for… Fudgement Day!
T-minus 3, 2, 1, FUDGE!
Raul, the world's greatest mustache! I haven't seen you since our big adventure. [smiles dreamily as he remembers the events from "The Mustache Kid" when Raul was first created] What? The police are after you? But… Hide, Raul!
Hi, Dad. What do you think of Manny's new look?
[Manny turns around with Raul, disguised as a pair of eyebrows before Emiliano rips him off from his face]
Hey, you can't… [painfully] YOW!!!!
You're coming with us, hairball!
[demanding] Let him go!
This mustache committed a major felony. Last night, some fiend stole the jewel-encrusted mace belonging to Municipal President Rodriguez. We found this. [holds up some mustache wax] Mustache wax, Raul's brand, and he was fleeing the scene. This mustache is going to jail for a long time!
He'd never do something like that!
We would, but not Raul.
[determined] I'll prove Raul is innocent! He and I will go undercover in the Mustache Mafia and find the mace.
You're doing what now?
I can handle those mop pinheads. What's the worse that could happen?
[as Frida removes her mime mask] Frida? [gasps in a state of shock] YOU'RE A CLOSET MIME!
ETEl Tigre/Manny
[holding an injured Raul; tearfully] Oh, what have I done? This is all my… [Raul reveals he was faking his injury and is okay; gasps in surprise, then smiles] You truly are the world's greatest mustache.
ETEl Tigre/Manny
Hey, before you go, I think I figured a less painful way for you to get off my face. [Raul springs from Manny's face and flies away] For once, would you… [painfully] YOOOOOOOOOWW!!!!! [falls on his back and passes out]
[laughs] That never stops being funny.
Why do we have to get all gussied up for dinner?
Grandpapi has something important to tell us.
[excitedly] Perhaps he's finally getting me that pony he promised me for my 10th birthday!
[Flashback to his 10th birthday]
1Y10-year-old Rodolfo
A pony? [opens his birthday present, which is revealed to be a cactus pot, gets poked by its thorns while hopping on it, and screams in pain]
[Flashback ends with everyone looking at him, all unamused]
I did say perhaps.
[Sartana arrives at the Rivera house, blasting the door down with her mystic guitar]
[alarmed in horror] Sartana of the Dead!
[fiercely] You dare intrude upon my father's special day?! [he and Manny change into White Pantera and El Tigre, preparing to take her down]
You're making a mistake!
ETEl Tigre/Manny
Don't worry, we'll get rid of this filthy garbage before your fiancée gets here. [he and his father start charging at Sartana together]
[gets in the way, defending her] NO! [Manny and Rodolfo crash into him] You no understand. This filthy garbage, she is my fiancée! [Sartana waves sweetly and they both hold hands]
[dreamily] Pumey, the love of my afterlife.
ETEl Tigre/Manny
[not believing it; shocked] It's like a horrible dream.
Or a really romantic nightmare.
[as Rodolfo peeks out the door, seeing if there's a pony] There's no pony!
[Rodolfo sulks and walks back to the dining table]
[sitting at another table with Manny and two of Sartana's skeleton bandits] Man, I hate sitting at the kids-and-skeletons table.
ETEl Tigre/Manny
ARE YOU ALL NUTS?! This is Sartana of the Dead, our most dangerous enemy! We have to stop this!
It is Grandpapi's decision. We must respect it, no matter how unsafe, demented, and revolting it is.
Thank you.
Manny, I hope that one day you will call me, Grandmami.
ETEl Tigre/Manny
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO…!!! [continues screaming as time goes by and stops] Whoa, how long have I been screaming?
Eh, a couple hours. We tried to stop you for while, but everyone got tired and went to bed.
ETEl Tigre/Manny
Sartana's up to something. This is all a plan to destroy Grandpapi. We will drive a wedge between them and stop the wedding. This I swear!
Oh, why won't anyone listen to me? We have to stop this wedding! I tried everything.
MMonsterzuma
[bursting into the church, and crashing the wedding] WHERE IS JEWEL?!
[to Manny; sternly] Manny, did you do something?
I stole Monsterzuma's jewel so he'd wake up and track it down and destroy the wedding. Hey, it seemed like a good idea at the time.
I here to play the darts!
ETEl Tigre/Manny
Yeah? What kind of loot you got?
[takes her glass eye off her face and sets it down on the table] This! I bet my glass eye against… your El Tigre belt.
ETEl Tigre/Manny
My belt? Psh. For that? [starts to walk away] Forget it.
You Riveras are chicken!
[takes off his El Tigre belt and sets it down on the table in fury, having to have heard that] My belt against your eye! One dart!
But, Manny, you stink without your Tigre powers.
Family honor will guide my aim. [throws the dart at a photo of Dr. Psyclopsis, missing the target; shaking his fist] CURSE YOU, FAMILY HONOR!
These quotes come from Wikiquote's El Tigre: The Adventures of Manny Rivera pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.