Fenton Crackshell quotes from DuckTales

Fenton

Of course you know, this means a skirmish.

Fenton

It must be something you said; a secret word. Here goes - uh, "Ducks of Hazard." Uh, "now look what you've done!" ...Oh, blatherin' blatherskite! What could it be!?

Fenton

[watching Scrooge freak out and begin to make squirrel noises] Interesting...

Fenton

But I'm too young to die! And too nice! And much, much too nervous!

Fenton

Friends, Romans, and banana lovers! I regret that I have but one life to give to your ridiculous country!

Fenton

[on climbing under a moving train] Kids, don't try this at home!

Fenton

If I have to, I'll save Mr. McDuck's money armed only with my wits! And no cracks about going into battle unarmed!

Fenton

Yipes! What do I do next? I'm no Launchpad! I can't fly!"

Fenton

Together we can turn the financial world upside down!

Scrooge

Do you mind if we start with my clothes?

Fenton

[being dragged out of Scrooge's office] Give me a shot!

Scrooge

You got it!

Fenton

465!

Scrooge

465 what?

Fenton

Uh, shotgun pellets.

Scrooge

[dumbstruck] You counted them?

Fenton

I... sort of have a knack for that.

Scrooge

Oh, yeah? Count this.

Fenton

$1.78.

Scrooge

[looks] Amazing! To the penny! You're hired.

Fenton

The Money Bin's full! Your frozen assets are now lukewarm.

Scrooge

Good, Fenton! Every last dime's been accounted for?

Fenton

Yup! Except for the dime I used to make this call.

Scrooge

Dime? What dime?!

Fenton

Oh, just an old shiny one.

Scrooge

In a glass case?!

Fenton

Yeah, but I'll pay you back.

Scrooge

That was the first dime I ever earned, you idiot! Why else would it be in a case?!

Fenton

Blatherin' blatherskite! I thought it was for emergency phone calls!

Scrooge

Get it back, now! Or you're FIRED! [phone explodes in Fenton's face]

Fenton

I think he's mad.

Fenton

Uh, hi! I'm your new neighbor! Could I borrow the proverbial cup of sugar?

Ma Beagle

Uh, well, uh, I don't have a proverbial cup. Will a tin one do?

Fenton

[in disguise] Hi, Ma! It's me, Bermuda Beagle, back from being lost for 20 years in the Bermuda Triangle!

Ma Beagle

Bermuda Beagle? I don't remember a son named Bermuda. 'Course, I got more boys than a toad has warts!

Fenton

Ah, the old place looks just like I remember it!

Ahhh, but we didn't live here 20 years ago.

Fenton

B-but what does it matter? The point is, we were together, a family. And by golly, any low-down worm that disagrees, he'll just have to take it up or we'll forklift it out of his hide. Speaking of hide, let's Beagle-bond a bit with a rousing game of hide-and-seek!

Ooh, ooh, goody! Who's gonna be it?

Fenton

Let's flip for it! Heads I win, tails you lose. Anybody got a bag full of dimes we could use?

Ma Beagle

Hold it, you canine counterfiet! Look at this family photo. No Bermuda!

Fenton

Uh, would you believe I was adopted?

Fenton

Wakey-wakey. Hello, little boy. I'm the Tooth Fairy, and have I got a deal for you.

Uh, really?

Fenton

Yes. If you give me that bag of dimes, I'll give you this bag of teeth.

Better hang onto those - I think you're gonna need 'em!

Fenton

Hey, Ma! Look what I'm wearing!

Fenton, did you join a heavy metal band?