Sketchy quotes from Dark Angel

Your parents must have been terrorists, 'cause you guys are the bomb!

Well, if you're smart, no one. But if you're desperate and male prostitution is out of the question talk to that fool. [pointing to Normal]

...And we're jumped by a pack of local hard bodies. I throw a few punishers to defend our girl's honor, but these dudes are large and numerous. I go down... eventually.

Uh, that'd be a negative. Here. [hands his wallet over and the man knocks him down]

You got that right. I'm 90% certain that zombies walk among us.

Hey, guys. [Snaps a picture of them on his way out]

[Herbal] was smoking a marijuana cigarette in the men's room.

Herbal Thought happens to be a Rastafarian. Ganja happens to be a sacrament in his religion.

It says right there in Genesis: "Thou shalt eat the herb of the fields."

Listen, if Herbal was nibbling leafy vegetables in the men's room I would give up my life defending his right to do so. But no, that's not the case. He was breaking the law of the land.

Herbal

Normal said if I made two more runs before lunch, he going to make me employee of the week.

Oh, that's awful. Normal's really starting to terrify me.

For real.

If he's allowed to go unchecked, we are a heartbeat away from compulsory urine testing at Jam Pony.

Herbal

What would he be testing for?

Knowing Normal, probably flavor.

Max

Why is it that guys are so task oriented? It's just work, work, work, work, work.

Because otherwise all we'd think about is sex, sex, sex, sex, sex.

In defense of my gender women come into the world with a mission which is to make offspring. Men have to find a mission, create things. Um, space travel. Space travel, the carbureted bong. I personally know this guy who figured out a way to breathe through his anus by threading ordinary aquarium tubing inside his colon.

Max

You know what? I am beginning to think that Normal's right- you are an idiot.

One thing you can say about Normal is at least he knows who he is.

A constipated, crusty, angry, rhythm-free, Republican white man?

It's gonna run out before they get to us.

Max

Will you stop?

I really need new shoes, man.

Max

Uh, Sketchy, this line's for gas.

I know. Sky said if I score him a couple gallons of premium, he'd give me a pair of bike tires. Hey, no cutting!

Max

I thought you wanted shoes.

Sky doesn't have shoes. Herbal has shoes.

Max

So you're gonna trade him the tires for the shoes.

Herbal doesn't need tires. He needs a waffle iron for his lady. Original Cindy needs tires.

Max

And Original Cindy has a waffle iron.

No, Normal has a waffle iron. He's gonna swap Original Cindy for some lingerie so she can give it to Herbal for the tires Sky's giving me for the gas, which is how I'm getting my shoes.

Max

Nice. What does Normal want with lingerie?

I'm a businessman. I don't ask questions.

I pretty much get the drift here. You don't feature dudes.

Let's just say Diamond's never met a man worthy of her kiss, but I know how you boys like a challenge.

You're tripping, boo. You got an itch, go scratch. It ain't got to be all complicated either. The male mind understands the difference between love and sex. Sketchy, come here.

Hello, ladies.

I want to get busy with you.

Outstanding.

But I want you to forget about it as soon as it's over.

Yeah, no problem.

Don't be following me around all moo-eyed and "Baby, I love you."

Yeah, whatever you say.

See? No complications.

So when we going to do this?

Get away from me, fool, 'fore I put you in a world of hurt!

If I was making creatures in a lab, I'd make 'em look just like you.

Really? That's--that's really sweet.