Witness: Can I have your number?
Det. Jessica Angell: Why, are you in trouble?
Witness: No, but I'd like to be.
(scene shift to Danny and Stella listening to Angell)
Danny: So did you give him your number?

woman 1: (walks to the crime scene and sees the victim)That's my husband! That's my husband!
woman 2: (walks to the crime scene few minutes later)That's my husband! That's my husband!

Yuri Sokov: I'm an American citizen.
Detective Danny Messer: With a rap sheet as long as the Constitution.

(About a perp who starts off as soon as he notices them)
Flack: Why do they always run?
Danny: I don't know. Must be brain damage.

(about a skateboard being used as a weapon)
Danny Messer: My mother always told me those things were dangerous.

(About cage fighting)
Mac: I've seen a few matches. That's a brutal sport.
Flack: It's an excuse for two grown men to legally beat the bloody pulp out of each other.
Mac: So you're not a fan?
Flack: I didn't say that.

(about Stella receiving a parachute as a gift)
Mac: There are safer ways to beat the traffic.
Stella: Oh, traffic I can handle. Men are another story.
Mac: What is it?
Stella: (opening an envelope) Hmm. Gift certificate for a skydiving lesson. Met this guy in an antique store and then bumped into him again... at a coffee stand. And suddenly he wants... to hold hands at 10,000 feet. So he sent me a parachute.
Mac: Original and daring.
Stella: And a bit too aggressive for me. What?
Mac: You were smiling when you opened the box.
Stella: (chuckles a little) Mac, my last boyfriend tried to kill me and I shot him.
Mac: Well, maybe this guy's a little different. Why don't you just run him through NYSPIN?
Stella: Actually, I already did. There are three Drew Bedfords in the city. One is 96 and lives in a rest home. The other is in juvie for painting boobs on a billboard. And my original endearing friend is, uh, squeaky clean.
Mac: You and I are alike in a lot of ways. We both do everything we can to avoid this sort of thing. Sometimes you just gotta take the plunge.
Stella: So you're telling me to fall for all this?
Mac: Stella, Peyton pursued me. I never thought I'd enjoy another relationship either. Forget about all the risks of romance and enjoy the rewards.
[about a girl who was killed by fatal orgasm while eating a pickle]

(About the 'Rocky Horror Picture Show')
Mac: They're still showing that thing?
Jo: Apparently so.
Mac: I never saw that.
Jo: You didn't? Aw, Mac, you should. I think you'd love it. It ranks right up there with that eight-hour Reagan documentary you're always watching.

(about the fallen-angel victim)
Flack: No ID on the vic. Could be a Michael or Gabriel. They say it's tough to make it in Manhattan. Heaven must be brutal.
Mac: Yeah.
Flack: Still checking Missing Persons and Nostradamus.

(about their cut up victim)
Stella: She was alive when he cut her in half.
Mac: Something tells me this girl wasn't a volunteer from the audience.

(about their victim in the tub)
Danny: So she comes in, drinks some champagne and takes a bath.
Peyton: Just like the fairy tale.
Mac: Only this Goldilocks isn't sleeping. She's dead.

(Adam is trying to get the tie knot right)
Lindsay Monroe: Do you need a hand?
Adam Ross: No, I got it. Got it. Just got to...
Lindsay Monroe: By the time you're finished, it's gonna be the 20th anniversary.

(After creating an internet profile page for Mac)
Lindsay: There we go, hours of social networking at your fingertips!
Mac: Great. I don't want a profile page.
Jo: Oh, it doesn't matter, that's the point. Someone else can build it for you.

(After Danny performs a cards trick)
Lindsay: That's very impressive.
Danny: Thank you.
Lindsay: I think you should stick to your day job, though.

(After Danshov's car was hit by a biker on the run)
Flack: Did you get a good look at his face?
Pavel Danshov: I got a good look at my fender.
Flack: And you had nothing to do with those shots that were fired?
Pavel Danshov: A dead judge is bad for business. A crooked judge is much better.