Sid Hammerback quotes from CSI: NY

Sid Hammerback

The human skull is composed of one of the most durable substances found in nature. It takes approximately one ton to reduce the diameter of the skull by one centimeter. Unfortunately for Walter Travers, when you get whacked in the head multiple times with a blunt-force object, that doesn't mean a whole lot.

Sid Hammerback

This poor boy was beaten, cut and shot. Does it seem at all extreme for a simple street mugging?

Sid

I've pretty much seen it all, but no, I have not come across anyone who has successfully punched herself to death.

Sid

I once caught my own daughter faking a bloody nose with food coloring to get out of a spelling test. I know chicanery when I see it.

Sid

A dancer, more than any other human being, dies two deaths. Martha Graham said that.

Sid

(About the people he's given the money to) These ten cases, they really stuck with me, Jo, I mean, because their losses only got worse. They... they got pink-slipped or hit with back taxes or had to drop out of school. I just wanted to try and repair some of the damage, you know? 'Cause, I mean, let's face it. That's something people in our business rarely get to do. So I decided to hand-deliver those checks because I wanted to personally hand someone hope. Some kind of joy. Of course, we all deserve that, but trust me, Jo, these folks deserved it so much more.

Sid

I've been diagnosed with cancer. Yeah, non-Hodgkin's lymphoma, to be exact.

Sid Hammerback

Samples of both have gone to the lab, same with his personal effects.

Sheldon Hawkes

Watch?

Sid Hammerback

No, I kept that. [Hawkes looks at him] What? It was a nice watch.

Sid

You are as smart as you are beautiful.

Stella

Don't flirt with me, Hammerback.

Sid

Yes, Detective.

Stella

[walking away] Stay focused.

Sid

Uh, sorry for the delay. QT and I were busy necking.

Stella

Come again?

Sid

Necking.

Sid

Looking at his neck.

Stella

Oh.

Sid

You don't think I'd kiss a corpse, do you?

Stella

Oh, no, no.

Sid

That's disgusting.

Stella

I agree.

Sid

As long as we've got that straight.

Stella

So, Sid,...cause of death?

Sid Hammerback

Care to take a guess at cause of death?

Danny

Perhaps he stopped breathing.

Mac Taylor

Tattoo's been removed. Can you lift it?

Sid

I can lift the Titanic if you give me proper tools.

Lindsay

Do you think Danny calls me Montana because I'm a 49ers fan?

Sid Hammerback

He calls you that because he's got a crush on you.

Dr. Sid Hammerback

[to Hawkes] You ever have a threesome? It's not as glorious as you might imagine. It's complicated in dealing with different personalities and hey, sometimes you're just not in the mood, if you know what I mean. It's hard enough explaining that to one woman, let alone two.

Dr. Sheldon Hawkes

[interrupting] Sid.

Dr. Sid Hammerback

[continuing] And then there's...

Dr. Sheldon Hawkes

Sid.

Dr. Sheldon Hawkes

Anything else?

Dr. Sid Hammerback

Oh. Just some trace on Don Juan's right fingers. I'll send a sample to the lab.

Dr. Sheldon Hawkes

Okay.