Adam Ross quotes from CSI: NY

Adam

Mac. Look, I know I've called you a genius before, but this time, I really mean it.

Adam

You, uh, ever been fraudulently accosted, Jo? (Chuckles) I had this friend Pete who was fraudulently accosted, yeah. This girl picked him up at the, uh, Drunken Dog Tavern. Yeah, turned out she was a dude. What up?

Adam

My home life might've sucked, but... it's the evil you know, you know?

Adam

Tracked the seller of the antique revolver, and it wasn't easy because it was made back when the dinosaurs were roaming the earth.

Adam

After some masterful Internet sleuthing by moi, I was able to track down the gun to the seller.

Adam

(Reading texts on a cell phone) 'Fred goes to the video store on Broadway'. Fred, you are a moron. Online video, dude. 'He buys three videos for $25'. God, you're killing me. 'This was $15 more than twice what he paid for a box of Goobers'. I would go with Raisinets, but whatever. 'How much were the Goobers?' First of all, five bucks for chocolate covered peanuts? Second, isn't this kid in, like AP Calculus?

Adam

(Going through a teenager's cell phone) Everything is fairly innocuous. No sexting, nothing. It's pretty disappointing.

Adam

I only stood up to my dad once. I was 15. And he, he just got home from work. My mom was cooking dinner in the kitchen. He started hassling her... verbally. Then he pushed her hard against the wall and shattered this picture frame. My mom starts to cry. And I could, I could hear from the living room. Then he started to hit her. And I, I just... I couldn't listen to her cry anymore. So I got up and I grabbed a piece of broken glass off the floor and... I yelled at him to get off her. And I said: If you ever hurt me or her again I will kill you.

Adam

(To Mac) Boss, I don't want to tell you how to conduct your business, but you got to answer your phone. Okay? Your voicemail's all jacked up, Jo doesn't pick up her phone... I was literally left unsupervised for a really long time.

Adam

Perfect timing, fellas. We are looking down from 22,300 miles from space.

Danny

We found our spores here on earth, Adam.

Adam

I am a scientist without a badge, Danny. Trust me.

Adam

Hmmm. Aspergillus Sydowii.

Danny

I was just thinking about that.

Adam

It's the, uh...fungal spores found on Jennifer Fazotti's body.

Danny

Fungal spores. Says they're indigenous to the Sahara desert.

Adam

How does an African fungus end up on a murder victim in New York City?

Mac

This tooth came right from the shark's mouth. So, the person who owned it caught the fish or knew the person who did.

Lindsay

That could be in Australia for all we know.

Adam

Hmm. My friend Grateloupia turuturu would beg to differ.

Mac

Brown algae?

Adam Ross

Strange case, you know. Bar nuts, shark tooth, tropical fish.

Detective Mac Taylor

Beta Splendon. Or Siamese Fighting Fish, to be exact. The brilliant colors are exclusive to males. Males in the same tank will kill each other.

Adam Ross

Ironic.

Detective Mac Taylor

No. Wild Wild Wet.

Adam Ross

[laughs] Whoa. That's a very hip, very salacious Manhattan club. It just kind of popped in your head like that?

Detective Mac Taylor

And your point?

Adam Ross

[flustered] Well... well I just - just didn't think that you would just...

Detective Mac Taylor

The bar's over on Broadway near Chelsea University, Fighting Fish on every table. It's a short train ride from where Randy Williams was found.

Adam Ross

[impressed] Ah you're the man, you can hang anywhere you want, huh?

Detective Mac Taylor

I was at the scene of a crime, Adam. The bouncers went a little overboard, ended up killing some kid from Staten Island. Shrimp cocktail is fantastic. Get me something more on that tooth.

Adam

What would make a man want to put on a superhero suit and risk it all?

Sheldon Hawkes

The naïve belief that one man could make a difference

Adam Ross

That glass that Dr. Hawkes pulled from our John Doe... it tested positive for Krypton.

Det. Mac Taylor

Krypton?

Adam Ross

Kryptonite was Superman's only weakness.

Det. Stella Bonasera

Well, that explains everything.