Danny Messer quotes from CSI: NY

Danny

[bringing in some of the exotic cuisine] Who's going first?

Stella

You gotta be kidding.

Pass!

Hawkes

Uh-uh.

Lindsay

It's just protein. [takes a bite of fried tarantula and everyone looks on]

Mac

[smiling and holding out hand to Danny] Told you she'd do it.

Danny

[handing five dollars to Mac] All right, all right, here you go.

Mac

Okay! Pizza in my office. [Everyone but Lindsay and Danny leaves]

Lindsay

You bet Mac I wouldn't do it?

Danny

Yeah, what was I thinking? Never bet against a country girl.

Lindsay

[eating more] You know, actually it's not that bad.

Danny

Exotic cuisine. I'm talking about this thing that's going on at the Grand View Region this week. Black-tie affair and with the super-rich get together and they eat crazy stuff. I saw an ad for it yesterday.

Hawkes

Well that would explain the bow-tie, fancy-dress by the bed.

Danny

What do you think? You hungry?

Hawkes

Let's go.

[holds up a bowl of live centipedes, a delicacy] Want one?

Dr. Sheldon Hawkes

[really grossed out] Uh, no, I ate already.

[nods sympathetically] They're not for everyone

Danny Messer

I'm from the upper east side.

Danny Messer

.

Tastes like chicken, right?

Danny Messer

No.

Hawkes

I can't believe you just ate that. (about the millipede)

Danny

Like swallowing a worm in a bottle of tequila.

Danny Messer

(holding her in his arms for an experiment) Look you promised me drinks for this, but I think I'm going to need some dinner too.

Lindsay Monroe

I'm not going to give you anything if you don't get going. Make tracks, cowboy.

Lindsay Monroe

As soon as Hammerback's finished with you, I get to take the beetles back to the lab with me.

Danny Messer

Don't eat 'em. (he walks away)

Lindsay

You're a little late on that one.

Danny

(turns to look at Lindsay) Doesn't mean it's not funny.

Detective Danny Messer

So this guy walks over to a place he's never been and dies of no apparent cause?

At this point, yeah.

Sid Hammerback

Care to take a guess at cause of death?

Danny

Perhaps he stopped breathing.

Bad news, half the construction crew is backing George Clark, they all swear that when they left for the day Jim Morris was still alive.

Danny

Not surprised, I don't think this is anything to do with the construction. Seems to be about golf.

You thinking maybe we should get out for a round, talk the case out?

Lindsay Monroe

Have you ever had an anonymous phone call from a woman?

Danny Messer

Sure, it's happened.

Lindsay

Does it turn you on?

Danny

Whoa, slow down there, Montana. What did you have in mind?

Detective Danny Messer

[Danny and Mac need to retrieve a piece of evidence from a sewer grate, and Tony, the Midtown Fisherman, has made a device he uses to "fish" things out of grates on the street] Mr. Fisherman, we're in a hurry. Do me a favor, let us borrow your gadget.

Tony the Midtown Fisherman

[glaring] No. Get your own.

Danny Messer

Don't tell me you know a little something about football, please.

Lindsay Monroe

Is that so hard to believe?

Danny

No, it's just dangerous. I might ask you to marry me.

Danny

Alright, we have Tyrell's trainer with possible motive.

Lindsay

And we have mystery woman number 1, Charlene, with no apparent motive, but a lot of attitude which automatically makes her a suspect in my book.

Stella Bonasera

La Perla underwear. These babies sell for 350 dollars.

Danny Messer

I get my BVDs in a three-pack for 10 bucks. Boom.