I always thought that Jesus just walked on water and told people not to have abortions, but it's so much cooler than that. He was like E.T., Edward Scissorhands, and Marty McFly combined. I would love to make a Jesus movie.
I don't even believe in God but I love me some Abed.
Now, everyone open your textbooks, because Abed has broken the internet.
[Leonard and the others abandon Pierce and Richard after a dementia-ridden Richard crashes the Dean's car]
Let's bail.
Wait a minute; what about Richard?
Screw Richard! It's every man for himself!
Richard, are you alright?
RRichard
Who's Richard? Is that me?
Yes.
RRichard
Then I'm fine. Who are those people running away? Are those my friends?
Now, that's a very good question.
Dear God. My movie is the worst piece of crap I have ever seen in my entire life. How could I have been so blind? It's a self-indulgent, adolescent mess. I can barely sit through it. And now, with all this hype, I've got a real Snakes on a Plane brewing. Critics are gonna crucify me, my career will be over before it begins. God, I know I don't deserve it, but I need your help. Please take this project away from me. Make it rain. Send a meteor. Anything. Please? Now? [pause] Okay, I get it. This is what I deserve. I'll finish it up.
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