Codename: Kids Next Door Season 1 quotes

[after Numbuh 1 turned into a monkey] Well... the first thing we have to do is to appoint a new leader for your sector.

Who cares who's leader? We need to get Numbuh 1 back to his old self!

We have rules, Numbuh 3. All sector must have a leader! Even if it's temporary.

[eager] Ooh! Ooh! Ooh Ooh! Ooh!

Don't look at me. Been there, done that, not doing it again. Especially that you-know-what happened.

[sincerely] Of course Numbuh 5. [angrily] Then who's it going to be?!

Me! Me! Me! Me! Me

[thinks] I know, what about... you, Numbuh 2?

I don't know... leaders don't get to pilot their own ships. I'll pass.

[kneels in front of Numbuh 86] Oh pleease! Oh please, please! Oh pleease! Pleeaase...

Hmm... are you sure, Numbuh 2?

Absotively posulutely!

Well, I guess I'll have to figure out who it should be. [Numbuh 4 displays fireworks in the background saying "Choose Me!"] Now, let's see... [Numbuh 4 appears in front and gave a dance number] Okay, that decides it! The new temporary leader is... Numbuh... 3!

[happily] Me? Okay! First mission is... [angrily] Get Numbuh 1 back so he can tell me that code!

Numbuh 1

I guess we can all have fun in our own way.

Hooray!

Look out, true believer. With bones of solid peppermintium, the ferocious leader of Santa's elite strike force, ELFA Strike, is Wintergreen!

Numbuh 1

[after the KND break in the Naughty or Nice System and confronts the Delightful Children, they aim at them] Okay, for the last time, out of the— [they notice]

[the REINDEER System turn them into Grinch-like monsters] Help us, please! You must help us!

Thank you fellow students for electing US as your new president. We think you'll find the rest of the school year to be quite... delightful.

Mr. Dickson! I'd prefer if you and Mr. Cavallaro [distressed, worriedly] discussed invading elementary schools [continuing angry] after my class!

[disappointed, sadly] Yes, Mrs. Van der Baan.

Hey look! You can see Tommy’s tushie! [he and the crew laugh at him]

[singing and chanting] I see your heinie, all bright and shiny…”

Knock it off, you imbeciles! Keep rowing or we’re all doomed!

Looks like a full moon. Tonight! [the crew laugh even harder]

[notices Tommy naked] Oh! You there! You put some pants on this instant, young man! Do you understand me?! [she gets sucked into the whirlpool, the bathrobe rips apart, Captain Dirt is sucked in]

Noooo! So warm and soapyyyyyyy! [he is sucked into the vortex]

Now we’re caught in the whirlpool!

Alright, where'd that baby go?

AAH! I'm hit! everything's going stinky!

[on the recorded message] Hello, this is an anonymous message...from Ernest. Perhaps you think that your [insert breakable object here] is missing. But the truth is, [insert name of kid here] has taken it to a Vaseball to be smashed into eleventy billion pieces! Thank you.

Numbuh 1

[regarding the teens' prom] Now, I'm going to flow the meeting to Numbuh 2, who has prepared an elaborate computer stimulation of our plan to solve!

Oh yeah! This is gonna rock!

Well... I kinda didn't have time to make computer stimulation, so... I made a diorama instead! But it should still explain our basic attack the same way. First, we'll be like OOOOOGHH Wah WHOOSH! BAM! BAM! BAM! BAM! The teenagers go WAH! It's the Kids Next Door! Then we'll be like WOOOO SWWWAAAMM! And then they're like AAH NO HELP US! HELP US! Then we'll be like RRRAARRGHH! RARARARAGGRGHH! Then they'll go OH NO, PLEASE! We surrender! [ends up destroying his diorama and smiles]

That's the same diarrhea thing you made for history class!

Toilet-paper tube to chew on, sir? Chew tube? Would you like a chew tube? Chew tube for you? [ Squeaking ] okay, I'll bring you your sunflower seeds in a second! Chew tu- r-r-r-r-r-r! Dmitri, what did I say about squirting soda on a national flight?!

That kid doesn't get out much does he?

He's from the 19th century.

The 19th century? Get out of here.

It's true. He's like, never seen cars and stuff. Go on. Ask him something.

[Calling to Numbuh 19th Century] Hey, 19th century kid?! You want to watch a cartoon, on the television?

What are cartoons? And what is this thing called...tel-e-vision?

Hey, what do you think you're doing?! Nobody except for my delightful children is allowed to eat this cake!

I'll take one of those!

One of what?

What are you doing?

Eh, sorry.

Hello. Try this. [Numbuh 5 uses a S.P.L.A.N.K.E.R.]

Hey, aren't you a little short to be an ice cream man?

Aw, come on. I'm taller than that guy.

Where? [looks away; Numbuh 3 tries to squeeze his shoulder but it did not work again] Thanks! I had the worst crick in the shoulder-

[holding an ice cream gun] Try this next time.