C.C. Galleta quotes from Cheap Seats

Randy

"Marge Schott."

Jason

"Alright the point is we felt that Cheap Seats as a sports franchise deserved its own mascot too."

Randy

"So we combed the country. Scouting Renaissance fairs, Illegal rodeos, Wal-Mart grand openings looking for every conceivable novelty creature."

Jason

"And we narrowed it down to the three finalist. Here are their auditions."

(Wearing a chicken suit) "First off I will not wear this head. I don't believe in it. I will not act like a goofy mascot."

(Wearing a chocolate chip cookie suit) "You might have seen me in a few roles. I played a chocolate chip cookie in the How About Some Milk campaign."

(A homeless person) "To be honest man I haven't been inside of a building In about five years. I'm freaked out man."

"I will not shine a bald man's head at a baseball game."

"I'm a gogetrahidra I can do anything. You ask me to do anything and I can do it."

" I can make a dollar last me month. A month!!"

"I will not run and dive on a rain soaked tarp."

"I can play many different types of cookies."

"You can lose those chocolate chips if we need you to?"

"Absolutly I can take them out I can play Pecan Sandy if that's what you want uh these are birthmarks so."

(Crying) "Ah man have you ever since a cat without it's eyeballs in it's head" (digging through a trash bag)

"No no no no!"

"You have? What's the answer?"

"Well I think the question is what talents don't I bring."

"Alas, poor Yorick! I knew him, Horatio: a fellow of infinite jest, of most excellent fancy."

"Uh I can find vitamins in cigarette butts. Alot of vitamins in that stuff yall guys don't know."

"You know I can..Cookie Dance I don't know If you could use that on your show."

"Did you know If you're feeling emotional pain if you hurt yourself in the (beep) it stops it?"

"Stage talking. Hello! How are you!? Please dunk me in milk."

"Where be now your jives, your gambles, your songs?"

"I can..I made these shoes..made those shoes. I made those shoes!"

Randy

"When would you do something like that?"

"Well clearly not here apparently."

"HAAAA!"

"You guys are wrong. You guys made a big mistake."

"Hey Hey Hey Hey. It's over."

"Don't eat me. No no!

"You guys cool out we gotta find shelter!"

Jason

"Ladies and gentlemen..."

"The Giant Cookie!!"

"How bout it!" How bout it!"

"Drink! Drink! Drink!"

"Drink? You want me to? Ok!"

"Owww!"

"I'm sorry. I forgot. I'm lactose intolerant."

Randy

"That's ok!"

"Seriously guys, my throat's closing up! Can't breathe! Choking on vomit!"

Randy

"He's really hurt."

"The Cookie!!!"