Natella quotes from Bromwell High

[to Keisha] Well, I hate Valentine's Day. It always ends in depression, violence, or pregnancy. Depending if you're me, you, or Latrina.

So, this week's project is tolerance. I want each of you to do a presentation in assembly on Friday.

And the best one wins a prize!?

No, no prize.

I'm going to win that prize, Miss Dickson.

How do you always think you're gonna win?

Because I always do.

Oh yeah.

Really, there's no prize. I don't believe in prizes.

What, you don't believe prizes exists?

Well I believe they exist but...

Well then I'm going to win that prize, Miss Dickson.

I don't think so.

Oh don't you, Natella? And why won't I win?

Because, I always do.

Oh yeah.

Well today's the day.

Yep, D-day.

Yep, Thursday

Yep, Friday.

Yep, Wednesday

No, Keisha, it's Friday

Or maybe it's D-day

Yes, but...

You think you know so much about the days of the week!

Well, what did you think? Give me your honest opinion.

You were shit, shittier than shit. You were so shit it made me wanna block up my ears with shit, and eat some shit, and then do a shit.

Right...Latrina?

Shit.

Well, obviously I can't expect you to appreciate the subtleties of Indian classical music. For my talents to be truly appreciated, I require a more sophisticated audience.

I agree, if sophisticated means deaf.

You'll get detention if you set the school on fire!

And if my auntie had nuts she'd be my uncle!

Keisha, you have a detention.

[on mobile phone] Auntie May! You is a lying bitch!

You've set fire to 3 things this week!

No way. Prove it.

One thing on Monday, one thing on Tuesday, and one thing today. One and one and one is three.

I have to tell that Aisha broke the swing. That is the right thing to do.

That is the right thing to do, and after she murders you, you'll go straight to heaven!

I'm a Hindu.

Disneyland?

Latrina, your mum needs to stop having babies!

Oh Natella! Not having babies is for gays!

It's always some day or another at this school! Today's sex education day, yesterday was Monday. Let's take a day off, man!

You always want to take a day off. You're trapped in a cycle: don't want to learn because you can't read, can't read because you don't want to learn.

I can't read, Natella, because I have attention deficit disorder.

What's that?

What's what?

Mrs. Jackson, have you done something with your hair?

Err, no.

Well you should, it's a disgrace!

Keisha, are you thinking what I'm thinking?

Yeah! Where's our modern-day Jonathan Swift?

Closer than usual.

I'm a natural orator!

Ooh, me too! It's all about tucking your lips over your teeth.