Brickleberry · Season 1
I'm gonna ask you all as nice as I possibly can: GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY TRAILER PARK!!!! Please!
Well he did say please. Let's go. [all the rednecks start to leave]
Drive carefully!
What the hell's that supposed to mean? [riot starts]
Oh hey, Jerry! What's up?
You two know each other?
Yeah, we went to middle school together. Hey, Jerry, remember when you sneezed and got Wanda pregnant?
I'm still paying for that cold.
[via computer voice] People of Earth. You are in no danger. Please remain in your homes. Ha. Ha. Ha.
[swipes the stick away from Steve] Give me that! You can still talk, you moron.
Hey, give that back. It makes me sound smart like that crippled scientist, Tony Hawk.
[referring to Steve's handicap] Oh, look, everybody! The attention whore is here!
Woody!
Oh, walk it off, Steve! Everything will turn out fine just like it did for Christopher Reeve.
But he's dead.
Exactly.
If it's a black guy, we're frying him.
Competing for team Brickleberry, the Swiss Fist...Magnus Blickensderfer!
[crowd cheering; applause]
And for team Yellowstone, the ranger of danger, Steve Williams!
What's up, bitches?
[crowd groans; in disgusted]
[gasped] Steve, what did you do to yourself!?
I took a shit-ton of steroids, like you told me to.
I never told you to do that.
You implied it. And now look at the Steve, he's ripped!
Did you work out at all?
You have to work out? What the hell good are steroids then?
That's far enough. Death to some small part of America. I thought I wired the scissors. Magnifying glass? No. Nail file? No. Fish scaler? No. Bubble wand? No. Pregnancy test? No. Lipstick? No. Chapstick? No. Stain stick? No. Glue stick? No. Glow stick? No. Blow torch? No. Smaller Swiss army knife? No. Baby dildo?
[Steve and Magnus was ready to fight the battle]
[about Connie] All that running and crying, you think she'd be thinner.
[referring to Jorge] Who the hell invited this guy? We are definitely anti... anti... uh... [to Jorge] What the hell are you anyway?
Ha, ha, ha. Little cranky pants didn't have his nap.
I am gonna fucking claw your eyes out!
Tantrums are normal for gifted kids.
I'm not a kid. I'm a wild animal!
And he has such a colorful imagination. Well, and ADHD. [Malloy bites her arm] OW! go play honey!
[Ethel throws Malloy breaks out the window from the her cabin]
"Jar Jar Binks, what are you doing in my room?"
"Meesa like! Meesa like you!"
[pours lotion onto his Jar Jar puppet-wearing right hand] "Jar Jar, what are you doing? Jar Jar, this is crazy!" [starts jerking his dick off] "Stop, stop, don't stop, aaaahhh...ah, that feels good."
[imitating Connie] "Look at me, I'm Connie, I'm Driving. Oops! I hit something. Dum dee dum dum dum dum....BANG! Shot Malloy's parents, I'm so stupid."
Oh no! It was me. I killed Malloy's parents. I need to confess to him right now!
But those animals might kill you.
It's what I deserve! Unless there's some other piece of information that could clear my name or save my life.
Hmmm, not that I'm aware of...
[Connie screams as she runs off, offscreen, door closed]
[sees a husband and wife leaving in their car] Where're you going? You just got here!
Hey! No one wants to go to a park without animals.
Yeah, it's like going to a Lakers game and not getting gang-banged by the team while my husband pulls the car around.
Yeah! [pause] What she say? [Woody throws a rock at their car window]
Okay, Jorge, there's the line for the costume contest.
When does the furry sex commence? My sack grows tight with anticipation!
In a minute. Come on. Left, right, left. Shorten your gait. Come on.
What the...What the fuck?
Denzel could do it. What's so hard about this?
Because my eyes sting from the fumes coming from your anus. You smell like the Middle East!
[to Ethel] Do men with exceptional beards make your fish flaps foamy?
There is some really obscure racism in this town.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Brickleberry pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
