Jonesy quotes from Blue Heelers

Jonesy

What do you call this?

In my world, we call that a shovel.

Jonesy

Yes, well, in my world, we call that blood.

And in my world, I call that a reason for a visit to the station.

I thought you were the romantic.

Jonesy

Yeah, but that's just stupid.

She just flashed me.

Jonesy

Who? Kelly? She's sick, man. She's delirious. I dunno, I wouldn't take it as a compliment.

No, that school girl.

Jonesy

I'm sure you'll get over it.

I'm old enough to be her dad.

Jonesy

What do we have here?

We have a Luke Knights...

Jonesy

Is that right? G'day, Luke. I'm an Evan Jones, and I've had several less hours sleep than I need, so you are not in friendly hands here, son.

Get in there you arrogant little sh*t!

We can't do that, can we?

Jonesy

We just did.

Jonesy

Amy's a good copper. She's as straight as they come, but she will listen to any reasonable suggestion.

Yeah well, you must know a different Amy Fox.

Looks like your gut was better than mine...this time.

Jonesy

Well if it's a competition, then you've got plenty of time to get your own back. I just got accepted into detective training school.

Did you pass?

Jonesy

Of course!

Thank God!

Woo, Jonesy. You're a brave man. Women are going to be mobbing you in the streets dressed like that.

Jonesy

Well, it beats the uniform.

Well, I just actually realised how much I like the uniform.

If you ever come to work wearing something like that, I will shoot you.

Jonesy

Suse.

Hmmm...

Jonesy

The suit?

Right...

Jonesy

You all but told her exactly what to say.

She said it was possible.

Jonesy

Highly unlikely is what she said.

Extremely unlikely is what she actually said, but still possible.

Well of course I need you, grab him!

Jonesy

Want a coffee as well?!

So finally your sluttish ways have come back to haunt you!

Jonesy

I wasn't that bad.

Old rubber hips Jonesy.

Jonesy

This isn't funny.

Oh it is. Just a little bit.

I thought you went home.

Jonesy

Well, maybe I like paperwork.

I said I don't mind doing it.

Jonesy

We're in this together...partners.

Is that what we are?

I wouldn't mind a coffee.

Jonesy

Good. You can get me one.