[Mike is in a motel room with an arms dealer, looking at sniper rifles]
LLawson
Good bolt-action rifle, if you jammed it, I'd wager you were setting out to do so. Which brings us to the M40: tried and true, battle-tested. Essentially, the same rifle used by marine snipers since 1966. It's light, accurate, good for soft targets in the 800 to 1,200-meter range. [Mike inspects it] You seem to know this one.
Oh, yeah. You could say that.
LLawson
That's the A1 model. There's not much change from the original. Biggest difference is the stock, it's fiberglass instead of wood. They changed it over in 1970 or so.
Good. Wood warped like hell. You get it wet, you put it in the sun, gone. Somebody probably shoulda figured that out before they sent it into a damn jungle.
LLawson
Yeah. Probably. [beat] Well, if these aren't to your liking, I could get my hands on a few more.
No. I've changed my mind. Thank you, I don't need anything at this time. [holds out money] For your trouble.
LLawson
Oh, it's no trouble. I make my living on repeat business. When you need what I'm offering, you know where to find me.
[Kim has been called to a meeting with Howard and Chuck over Jimmy's unapproved TV commercial]
It's a simple question, Kim: Did you or did you not know about this commercial?
And you didn't say anything, to anyone?
You didn't think I deserved a heads-up?
I didn't realize—At the time, I didn't think it was necessary.
Well, you were wrong about that. We were caught flat-footed in front of our co-counsel, which I don't need to tell you does not reflect well on HHM. Or on you. [long pause] That will be all. You can go.
[Kim leaves the conference room]
You have to admit that shows a lack of judgment on [Kim's] part. She knows you. She should have known better.
Why? For pointing out that her one mistake was believing in you?
For Christ's sake, could we get some perspective here? It was a simple little commercial, it aired once, that's all. And can I remind you it worked—it worked like a dream?
See, that's your problem, Jimmy. Thinking that the ends justify the means. And you're forever shocked when it all blows up in your face.
What did I do that was so wrong?
You broke the rules. [Jimmy scoffs] You turned Kim into your accessory. You embarrassed Howard who, God help him, inexplicably vouched for you with Cliff Main. You made Cliff and his partners look like schmucks. Shall I go on? How he hasn't fired you for this positively mystifies me. "Perspective." You want perspective? I'll give you mine. You're my brother, and I love you, but you're like an alcoholic who refuses to admit he's got a problem. Now someone's given you the keys to the school bus and I am not going to let you drive it off a cliff.
C-Can we get down to brass tacks here? What can I do to put Kim back where she belongs, huh? Wha- you want me to quit Davis and Main? That's fine! I never wanted that job in the first place!
[exasperated] I-I can't get through to you. Life is not one big game of Let's Make a Deal!
Yes, it is! I'm Monty Hall, what's behind door number two? What'll it take, huh?! [pause] You want me to quit being a lawyer? [Chuck scoffs] Yuh, "a chimp with a machine gun," that's me, right?! Huh? So, what do you say? You help Kim, I quit the law. Is that a deal?
You didn't say it, but that's what you want, right?! That's why you put the screws to Kim in the first place, to squeeze me!
I didn't say that, and I would never say that.
Because if I were impeding the career of one of my employees, for the purpose of compelling you to do something against your will, that would be extortion.
[chuckles] Yeah, it would. So? You gonna extort me, Chuck? It's a lead-pipe cinch: You get away with it, I'm not gonna tell anyone. It's real easy—You just set things right with Kim, you get her back in her office out of doc review, everything back to normal, and I quit the law... for good. No more Jimmy McGill Esquire. Poof, like he never even existed.
But I need to hear the words come out of your mouth, okay? You're a man of your word, you're an upstanding man, right?!
Come on, Chuck! Extort me! Say "quit" and I will quit, but I need to hear it from your mouth.
You want me to commit a felony... because that's what you'd do, right?! Because you want to believe that deep down, I'm some hypocrite!
Let's find out. Come on down, Chuck, roll around in the dirt with me! All your dreams will come true! Go on, do it! Go on!
[Chuck stares at Jimmy]
I am not the bad guy here. You don't want to be a lawyer, that's between you and the New Mexico State Bar. You want to quit Davis & Main, be my guest! You clearly don't need any help from me to tank your career; you're doing just fine on your own.
[Mike drives to the El Michoacan restaurant after alerting the police of Tuco's location. As he pulls into the parking lot, he hits Tuco's car. Tuco and Nacho notice this and stop their deal inside the restaurant.]
What the fuck? Did you see that?
That old man... just hit my car.
[Mike comes inside while Tuco stares him down.]
Let me see. Um... give me the #4. The pollo, por favor. That's to go.
Hey, you. Hey, gramps! You just hit my car.
[laughs; to Nacho] Check out Mr. Magoo here. [to Mike] Yes, sir. You see that car that you parked your piece of shit next to? That's mine. You just ran into it.
Hey! I saw it, too. You gonna stand there and deny it?
I offered to do this the right way. If you can't accept that, then I can't help you. [Tuco takes his keys and throws them to Nacho] Aw, come on, guys!
I'm gonna make this real simple for you. Give me your wallet and maybe you'll walk away from this.
[pause] I'm not giving you a damn thing.
No, homes? [reveals gun underneath his shirt to Mike] Give me your wallet!
Let's just stay calm here.
[laughs] You see me sweating, bitch? [shoves Mike] Wallet! [Mike looks to his right] Wallet! Wallet.
[Mike reluctantly takes his wallet out of his back pocket]
[snatches wallet from Mike's hand and takes out cash] There's like, 400 here!
[Nacho hears sirens in the distance]
You got some crazy lip on you, old man! Your life, worth 400 bucks?
Hey, Tuco! Time to bounce!
[Nacho drops the keys, then gets in his van and drives off]
You... are one lucky old man. [Mike suddenly grabs Tuco's boxing gloves necklace] The hell? Let go!
[Mike knocks Tuco's gun away, and the two start a fist fight. Tuco throws several punches at Mike. Mike notices two cop cars pulling into the parking lot as Tuco beats him]
OOfficer
Hands up! Now! On the ground!
[bloody-faced] That all you got?
OOfficer
Get on the ground!
[Tuco laughs madly and lands a punch to Mike's eye]
[In a flashback, Jimmy has dinner with Chuck and his then sister-in-law, Rebecca. He pipes up after an awkward silence]
Alright, what's the difference between a vacuum cleaner and a lawyer on a motorcycle? The vacuum cleaner has the dirtbag on the inside. Ha!
I've only been in the mailroom a week and I've heard maybe a hundred! It all comes from a place of affection.
What do you get when you cross The Godfather with a lawyer? An offer you can't understand.
And believe me, I have nothing but the utmost respect for your profession. I mean, it's a pillar of— oh, why do they bury lawyers under twenty feet of dirt? Because deep down, they're really good people. [Chuck gets uncomfortable] What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 60? Your Honor. What's the difference between a tick and a lawyer?
RRebecca
[amused] Oh, no.
The tick falls off when you're dead! [Rebecca laughs] Bam! Love that one. You like that? [to Chuck] Just joking. I want you to know how seriously I take my job. I—Grateful for the–oh! How many lawyers does it take to change a lightbulb? Classic setup here. Three: one to climb the ladder, one to shake it and one to sue the ladder company. [he and Rebecca laugh]
[gets up] Dessert, anyone? We have a homemade blueberry crumble with vanilla ice cream.
Yeah, blueberry crumble, sounds terrific. I love a fruit based—
RRebecca
Wait, I think I have one!
RRebecca
Yeah, yeah. What do lawyers and sperm have in common? Um, three million—No, wait. One in three million have...
[in unison with Rebecca] ...A chance of becoming a human being!
[Both laugh as Chuck awkwardly leaves. Later, he and Rebecca are lying in bed]
RRebecca
Well, that went well.
RRebecca
I don't know what you were worried about, Jimmy's great.
[Jimmy visits Kim in the basement of HHM, where she has been demoted to document review again.]
Wexler v. Hamlin Hamlin McGill. You want me to sue my own firm?
Filing's all typed up, it's ready to go. This is not my area of expertise, alright? So, first order of business: we get a great employment law attorney, show 'em we mean business. [Kim rubs her face in frustration] Come on! Hey, look at you, okay? You're here at midnight in this glorified cellblock, busting your ass, for what? It has nothing to do with your performance. You're being mistreated. Chuck is punishing you to get to me! This is extortion, pure and simple.
No, that's Howard, who has an image to uphold. He did the same thing after the Kettleman fiasco, and Chuck was nowhere in sight.
...I'm telling you, Chuck is behind this.
No, you are behind this. I told you this would happen, and now I'm paying the price. I should have known better. So now, I'm keeping my head down and I'm getting through this, and I'm most certainly not suing HHM.
Even if I won, who would hire me? That would be career suicide.
All right. Then I quit Davis & Main.
What does that accomplish?
It's the only way to get you out of dutch. Because this is about Chuck, whether you want to believe it or not. I give him what he wants, he lets up on you.
Wow, my knight in shining armor. That is some sacrifice, quitting a job that you've been trying to tank since day one.
I dig myself out of this hole. You do your job, Jimmy. Prove you can go one week— hell, one day without breaking the rules of the New Mexico Bar Association or pissing off your boss, and don't insult my intelligence by saying you are doing any of this for me. You don't save me. I save me.
Do I have a future at this firm?
We have a lot in common, you and I. My brother left you holding the bag. If it makes you feel any better, you're not the first person to go out on a limb for him. I made the same mistake, over and over again... and now Howard has, and he blames you. A damn mess. Jimmy ever tell you anything about our father?
My dad—our dad—he was... well, the personification of good. I'm not sure he could even see sin, in any form. Like he was born without the gene. He ran a little corner store in Cicero. Cigarettes behind the counter, penny candy. Nothing special, but it kept food on the table, and the neighborhood loved Dad. He knew everybody's name, what was going on in their lives. Just a little corner. He made it better. I was named after him. Before that, he worked for a lot of people over the years and his dream was to be his own boss. Put everything he had into that place. I was away at college when he put Jimmy to work there. Jimmy grew up in that store, watching our father... but Dad was not the world's greatest businessman, and eventually he ran into money troubles. I had a clerkship at the time, but I came home to help him get his books in order. Set the ship straight. Now, I'm no accountant, but I discovered $14,000 was just gone. Vanished over the years. Turns out Jimmy had pilfered it in dribs and drabs, just took it out of the till. My dad wouldn't hear it. Nope, not his Jimmy. He ended up having to sell. Six months later, he was dead. At the funeral, no one cried harder than Jimmy. My brother is not a bad person. He has a good heart. It's just he can't help himself... and everyone's left picking up the pieces.
[Mike is sitting at a diner when Hector Salamanca walks in and approaches his booth.]
[Hector sits across from Mike. Fran, the waitress, comes to the booth.]
FFran
Hi. What can I get you?
FFran
It's coming right up.
[Fran leaves. Hector observes the bruises on Mike's face left by Tuco.]
Mmm. He really did a number on you.
The young man who did that to you is my nephew. Hothead, always has been. He thinks he's a boxer. He should have shown you respect. I apologize to you on behalf of my family.
And you know what? He should go to jail. Best thing for him, teach him respect for his elders. But not for eight years. Less, much less.
[Fran comes back to pour Hector's coffee.]
You see where I'm getting at?
The gun charge, that's eight years he's going away, maybe ten. Aggravated assault, the gun, plus he got your wallet.
I would like for you to tell the police that the gun was yours.
Eh, you're both a little hot under the collar about whether you bump his car or not, but there was a scuffle and uh, he got your gun.
Your gun from your pocket, he got it and that's how his prints got on it.
Then I'd be subject to the gun charge.
You're an ex-cop. They go easy on you.
I even twist Tuco's ear, make him apologize, and he serves for battery, nothing else. [beat] I'm looking for the best possible outcome for everybody... and, for your trouble, you take home $5,000.
[Hector rises from his seat, leaves a tip, and begins to walk away]
[Rich Schweikart invites Kim for lunch after seeing her argue an unwinnable motion in court]
I have to say, watching you in court today. It sure did bring back some old memories for me. One in particular, anyway.
I was a year out of law school at this firm in Boston, and I was finally out on my first big case: this huge employment discrimination suit, that thing kept us in billing for a decade. Anyway, we landed this monster, and I find out I'm second chair to one of the partners on the preliminary hearing. And I think, "This is it. This is what will define the rest of my career." So, the hearing's getting closer and closer - I even get this new suit that I can't afford, I split it over three credit cards. I'm probably still paying it off to this day. So, I go in bright and early. I'm wearing my new suit, prepping my table, and in walks the opposing counsel. There's four of them: one senior partner and three high-level associates. These guys have been litigating longer than I've been alive, but I think: "Ehhh, I'm good. I got my boss coming, it'll be fine." So I'm sitting alone at my table, waiting for my boss to show, and I'm waiting... and I'm waiting... and then suddenly, they're calling us to order, and I realize that no one from my firm is coming—it's just me. So I think, "Alright then, this is the moment!", and I get up there and I argue like my life depended on it. I'm sweating, and I'm arguing statutes left and right, and I'm doing okay, respectable. But I'm just a BB gun to these four howitzers... and I lose, of course. It was inevitable... but later it hit me... that my boss never intended to show. And they laughed about it; they patted me on the back, said it was my trial by fire, and I laughed with them, but y'know, it never really sat well with me. You want them to have your back. Because at the end of the day, it wasn't about proving my mettle - my boss had a tee time he didn't want to miss. I wasn't there long.
...Could I ask why we are here?
You know, I've had my eye on you for a while. Since that Kettleman thing. It was an excellent deal you got for them, and I'm wondering... why someone who can put together a deal like that is arguing a losing position with no backup.
I have no complaints about HHM.
That's great. However, if on the off chance that you're pondering a change, Schweikart & Cokely would be more than happy to put your talents to good use.
Of course, we'd have to have a more formal meeting, work out specifics, but we think you would be a great fit.
Well, I'm flattered, but there's clearly an ethical issue here.
Well, of course, we'd take you off Sandpiper, and rest assured - we wouldn't be expecting any information about HHM's strategy. Look, we're a large, diversified firm; just think what you could do with our resources, and the freedom to really spread your wings.
[beat] That's... I owe a lot to HHM.
Your tuition debt? We can take care of that.
Well, give it some time to think about it. You give me a call and we'll set up a meeting with the rest of the senior partners, and to be clear... we're talking partner track.
[Mike is brought to the Salamanca hideout and put before Hector and the Cousins.]
Tomorrow, you go to the district attorney and you explain to him that my nephew's gun was yours. The DA will ask you why you didn't say anything before. You tell him you forgot, you were rattled. Make up anything you want, I don't give a shit. But it's your gun.
Let's discuss my payment.
Mm-mmm, that time is past. No five thousand for you.
How about the payment is you get to live?
Now you think you can negotiate with me? I say the word, my nephews go to a certain motel, pay a visit to your daughter-in-law and your little granddaughter. What do you think happens then? Consider your position carefully.
I get my money, or neither of us walk out of here.
[Mike reaches into his jacket, causing a reaction from the Cousins. Hector signals them to stand down.]
You're willing to die for this?
Maybe I need the fifty thousand more than you do.
[Hector chuckles]
[to Nacho, in Spanish] I told you, right? Giant balls. [to Mike, in English] How you manage to live so long with a mouth like that? Hmm? Fifty thousand, and the gun is yours.
[Mike opens his door to find Nacho with Hector's money]
I volunteered. Only safe way for us to talk.
[Mike lets him in and counts out the money]
You really pushed it in there. That thing we did? He finds out, we're both dead. You get that, right?
[playing dumb] What thing we did?
[Nacho nods and goes to leave, but stops when Mike holds out some money]
We made a deal, I didn't hold up my end. Your problem is coming back sooner than we expected.
Rich Schweikart said they would even pay off my law school loans.
That's great! Please let me be there when you tell Howard. Please? [Kim looks away] So why the sad puppy eyes? What, you don't want that job?
No, no, of course I do... I mean, who wouldn't, right?
It's a huge firm, you get out from under Howard's thumb...
Right. Exactly. Besides, HHM is looking more and more like a dead-end for me, anyway.
Exactly! So what's the problem?
I just... I don't know. I keep thinking of you floating in that pool. You knew what you wanted, but I got in the way.
What are you talking about?
You took the Davis & Main job because of me.
I took that job because it was the right decision. A steady paycheck? Done. A place to live that's more than oh, five square feet? Boom. A car that's all one color? Nailed it! I'm good, I got what I wanted. And you with the Schweikart thing, you could have everything you ever wanted! What's not to love about that?
Yeah... what's not to love?
[Jimmy represents Mike at the DA's office when he goes to change his testimony]
I regret to inform you that, with the benefit of hindsight, Mr. Ehrmantraut will be amending his original statement a tad.
A wee bit. He's decided that he can no longer, in good conscience, claim that the gun found at the crime scene belonged to Tuco Salamanca.
AEADA Ericsen
So, whose gun was it?
Who's to say? You know how many guns there are in Albuquerque? Somewhere between the number of rattlesnakes and grains of sand, so, a lot.
AEADA Ericsen
Was it your gun, Mr. Ehrmantraut?
No, he's not saying that-
AAADA Assistant
Can we hear it from Mr. Ehrmantraut?
The gun wasn't Salamanca's, that's all I can tell you.
AEADA Ericsen
You told us it was. You said Salamanca pulled it and pointed it at you.
AAADA Assistant
Why are you changing your story?
AEADA Ericsen
Look, there was only one set of prints on the gun: Salamanca's. How's that gonna happen if it wasn't his?
That's not really for my client to say, now is it? He's not a forensics expert. Who knows, maybe it, uh... fell from a passing bird's beak and Mr. Salamanca caught it, tried to throw it away. [Mike rolls his eyes] I mean, the possibilities are endless.
AAADA Assistant
Did Salamanca threaten you, Mr. Ehrmantraut?
AAADA Assistant
We wanna put this guy away for years. The gun makes all the difference, you know that. You gonna let this person victimize you twice?
Forget about the gun, alright? The gun was not Salamanca's. If you try to introduce it in evidence, Mr. Ehrmantraut will make himself available to the defense and he will set the record straight, categorically and unequivocally.
AEADA Ericsen
...Did he threaten you or pay you off?
[acting offended] Whoa! Okay, that's it! We're done.
[Jimmy gets up and holds the door for Mike. They stand in front of the elevator]
You're doing the right thing. This Salamanca character? Maniac. I had my own... thing with him. I didn't wanna say anything before because conflict of interest, yadda yadda, but yeah, he's nuts. [whispers] I'm talking, he had me hogtied in the desert with a gun to my head, broke two guys' legs right in front of me. If I hadn't talked him down, he probably would've... I'll spare you the gory details, but it was a deal and a half, not something you forget.
And you're telling me this, why?
Don't be too tough on yourself; like they say, discretion is the better part of valor. I would've done the same thing. Hey, today? It's on me, no charge.
[The elevator opens, but Mike pushes Jimmy away before he gets on]
You take the next one, and bill me.
Excuse me, can I have everyone's attention please? Everyone can hear me? Good. Frankly, this is not a conversation I ever thought I would have in my professional career. But it's been brought to my attention that we have an ongoing situation in the washroom. Someone is not flushing. Once is an accident, maybe even twice. Three times, nah, it's a pattern.
EErin
And we're not talking about a number one.
Yes, thank you, Erin. Now I'm not here to shame anyone, nor do I even want to know who did it. But—
Jimmy, I just said I didn't want to know!
Hey, we need the water. I read somewhere the Santa Fe Watershed is down two full inches this year. Every time you flush a toilet, you waste a gallon of water. A gallon! What could be greener than this?
They're low-flow toilets, Jimmy! From now on, flush!
That's... good, good thinking.
