Jane Read quotes from Arthur

Cucumbers: yucky. Mushrooms: yucky. Onions: yucky and smelly. Wait a minute, this isn't lettuce. What kind of a salad is this?

Uh-oh. [singsong] She's going to pop.

This is spinach.

Is something wrong?

This is spinach, AND I...HATE... SPINACH!!! [everyone in the restaurant gasps and laughed] Uh-oh!

[fiercely] That's it, I quit.

No!

[sternly quietness] Dora Winifred Read. [cut to Arthur's house with Grandma Thora and Baby Kate]

Back so soon. Did you all have a good time?

D.W. just punched her salad and then exploded! [pauses, David and Jane disappointedly stared to him] All over the waiter. But everyone was looking at us.

THEY WERE NOT!!! Everybody was making this into such a big deal!?

[sulky] No restaurants for you, young lady, until you behave and learn to eat what's placed in front of you. Now go to your room.

Jane, please.

Well, what about Grandma Thora's birthday at the Once Upon a Restaurant next week?

D.W. will not be joining us and gonna kill me.

Oh. well, that's too bad. [sighs] Dinner without D.W. I guess we'll just have to suffer through it without her.

If D.W. couldn't come to the restaurant, I'd be just as happy coming over here for dinner.

What? And miss Once Upon a Restaurant?

It just wouldn't be a happy birthday, if D.W. isn't here.

[Jane and David is not maintaining and arguing in off-screen] But this was the best restaurant ever! This was unfair! But am I supposed to do everything with D.W., or what?

(plays with dolls on the living room floor) This is Tiffany and this is her servant. And this is their lifeboat and these are the angry sharks... (Kate grabs Tiffany and D.W. gasps) No! I'll do the playing! You just watch me! (Both Kate and D.W. pull at the doll. The head falls off and D.W. gasps.) Aaugh!! Look what you did!

Play nicely, D.W.

But she killed Tiffany! [Kate giggles]

Here. Give that to me. This looks easy to fix. Don't worry. (She gives D.W. the fixed doll back.) Oh, there we go! Good as new! No need to get excited.

How come you're always on her side?

I'm not on anyone's side. But Kate's a baby, and you're a big girl.

[angrily] I am not a big girl, I'm a little girl! (Kate chuckles) Be quiet, you!

D.W.

You sweet, little baby-wayby! (She sees Jane leaves the room) This was mine! You can only touch it when I say so.

[concerned] D.W.?

[to Jane] No!!!

Give it back, or I'll pinch you!!!

Mama? [Jane grabs her]

I'll SMASHED alarm clock!

UAaRGh!! [drops the Tiffany doll]

[sternly] Dora Winifred Read, go to your room, and Arthur we're not smashing alarm clock in DW's room ever again!

But what did I do?

What about my supper? How will I survive?!

Supper's not till 6. You'll be out long before then.

But what if you forget about me? I could starve to death! Mom! Mom! (She clings to her mother’s leg. Mrs. Read looks stern. She sits D.W. down on the bed.)

It's 4:30 now. When the clock says 4:40, you can come downstairs. And I'll set the alarm so you'll know when it's time.

(cries on her pillow) You don't love me!? You only love Kate and Arthur and Daddy and Pal and... and Grandpa, and Aunt Lucy, and...and... (Jane has left the room with Arthur punched Jane Read's back and Nadine appears.) How long did she say?

10 minutes. When it says 4:31, that means one minute has gone by.

(grieves) And how about when Cousin Lucy got married? I had to stay at home and cook and clean while everyone else went to the wedding. (Imaginary flashback: D.W., in rags again, which are now completely tattered, cleans the fireplace and sneezes)

[indignantly in shouts] AREN'T YOU DONE YET?! YOU STILL HAVE THE BEDS TO MAKE AND YOU HAVEN'T EVEN STARTED THE BREAKFAST DISHES!!

[to Jane; Shouts] NEVER!!!

[in tears] Can't I go to the wedding, please?!

Weddings are *NOT* for little girls!

But what about Kate? She's going!

(insanely) Kate is a baby! Besides, we like her better than you. Ready, everyone? [these leaves in the house]

Don't forget to brush the dog. (D.W. brushes away her tears. She watches from the window as the family gets in the car and leaves with Arthur tells "Never, Mom! NEVER!!". The flashback ends. D.W. sniffs on her pillow.)

[moans] It was so sad being me.

But you went to the wedding, D.W.

Whose side are you on, anyways?

Mom?

[concerned] What was it, now?

Well, are you sure my clock was working? Because I've really been in here for hours.

Your clock was workin' perfectlys. Go back to your room.

That's it. Well, I think I'll call Grandma's. But at least she loves me though. (In her imagination, David picks up the phone in the kitchen. Grandma Thora is phoning from her kitchen with D.W. sitting next to her eating cookies.)

Hello?

Son, this is your mother. What do you mean by punishing poor little D.W.?! (looks at D.W.) Eat up, lovey. You can have all the cookies you want. (returns to call) How can you do that. Look at this little angel. This child is perfect. (A halo appears over D.W.'s head) Punish Arthur. He's the real troublemaker.

Absolutely. Yes, of course, Mom. Arthur, go to your room and never come out!!!

[gulps]

[Arthur punched Jane's arm and crying in off-screen while babbles and looks coos as D.W.]

[off-screen] Ow! Arthur, you punched me! That hurts!

Don't smile to me. [?] This was all your fault.

What did she do that was so bad?

That's NOT how nice animals play!

Francine

?

This is all Mom's fault! That cat trying to hurting Pal!

My fault?! That does not my fault. Francine got a cat?

Look how upset you made dad.

?