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S14

American Dad! · Season 14

Stan, Klaus and others in “Father's Daze”

[After Klaus exposes Stan's scheme to Steve, they are ready to catch him by surprise with it- but much to THEIR surprise, Stan is already in Steve's room]

Well, well, well.

Dad!

No. Looks like you got it all figured out.

W-W-Why are you doing this to us?

[imitating Steve's quivering to start off] W-W-W-W-W-W-W-why, why, why, why? Because you guys can't give me one decent day, no matter how many chances I give you!

Chances? What are you talking about?

RARadio announcer

[as the "alarm" Stan has set goes off at 5AM] Good morning! Rockin' Ronnie comin' at ya...

[opens his curtains, revealing snow on the window] Dad's been tricking us into reliving Father's Day every day for six months! [Hayley and Francine gasp]

[pissed off at this revelation] You brainwashed us?!

Oh, of course, make it about you! Well, since you won't remember this anyway, I'll get everything out of my system so I can wake up tomorrow without being so cheesed off! [sees Steve's lip quivering] Go ahead, Steve, cry! It'd be weirder if ya didn't! [Hayley gasps] Go ahead, Hayley, gasp. It'd be weirder if ya didn't!

Stan, enough!

[really losing it now] SINCE WHEN IS ANYTHING ENOUGH FOR YOU?!?! For the last 20 years, you just sit around and wait for me to bring home money. "I need rugs! I need bananas!"

Stan, stop before you say something you'll regret.

Oh, I haven't even STARTED! [as "Scatman" plays to block the dialogue, Stan unleashes a vicious and truly venomous speech about his family's faults; judging by the movements, he criticizes Francine for her pompousness and excessive alcoholism, Hayley for her near-incessant use of marijuana, and finally Steve for his immaturity and frequent masturbation]

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