[after his car runs out of gas] Stupid gas-guzzler--that I as an American have every right to drive.
“Homeland Insecurity” · Season 1, Episode 6
In this episode: Stan Smith (6), Francine Smith (3), Steve Smith (1)
So, what part of Islam do you hail from?
Well, my parents were from Iran, but I was born in Cleveland.
Really? You know, we also have a Cleveland here in America. And it'd be just super if you didn't blow it up.
It's potluck, so bring whatever you want.
But not smallpox. Ha, kidding. Kinda joking but not really!
Well, if you're ever taken hostage by, say, a neighbor, and you end up on Al Jazeera, just blink your coordinates in Morse code, like this [blinks quickly as an example] and I'll have a bomb dropped on your location.
But then I'd be dead.
Oh, c'mon, sport, there are plenty of kids in heaven to play with. Your cousin Billy. That little girl from Poltergeist....Well she must be at least sixteen by now. You could totally hit that!
I was finally making friends, Stan. How could you ruin my party?
It was easy. I just yelled "Terrorists!" and everyone ran away.
[Francine frowns at him]
Oh, I'm sorry. I thought you asked how did I ruin your party. And I'm, like, "You were there, baby. You had a front-row seat."
[Francine is pointing a gun at Stan to get him to release their neighborhood from their backyard]
Let 'em go, Stan! It's been a fun ride, but it's over!
Oh, not this old bit. You point a gun at me, I pretend I'm gonna do what you say, then I pull out my gun, we do our little John Woo standoff, inevitably your arm gets tired [Francine's arm starts to shake], then you drop your gun and we have nobody-got-shot sex. [she drops the gun, groans in agitation and leaves the room] Wh-where are you--Francine! W-well, why did you pull a gun on me if you didn't want to have sex?!
These quotes come from Wikiquote's American Dad! pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.



