Walter Stratford quotes from 10 Things I Hate About You

Walter

Why don't you wear that nice one you wore to last year's school play?

It was my costume. I was playing Helen Keller.

Walter

It was very flattering. Even she could see that.

Walter

(showing images from laptop) This is the baby crowning. Ooh, this is what placenta looks like. Here is the father cutting the cord. Of course, that's only symbolic because he's responsible for that baby for the rest of his life.

Got it. Sex makes babies.

Walter

Oh, my God! Do you mean to tell me the students have to leave their Uzis and heroin at home?

Kat

Dad, this isn't a joke.

Walter

How about knives and crack?

Walter

I don't get this, Kat. You always wanted to go to an Ivy League school.

Kat

They'll appreciate my social conscience.

Walter

No. They'll label you a problem student. You know how competitive it is. They'll look for some reason to reject you. It's like enlisting in the army and writing down, 'Oh, by the way, I'm gay.'

Walter

So let me get this straight, you're going to punish my daughter for trying to get a good grade?

Well, I'm sure as hell not going to reward her for breaching out costly yet apparently crap security system. … Kat's in my office more often than that boy who randomly bites peoples necks – damn this vampire craze.

Walter

Oh. Hi, honey. How was your day? Did you invite the man-boy to-

Kat

(about Patrick) He's not coming to dinner. He didn't want to summit to the inquisition. Are you happy now?

Walter

Of course I'm not happy. Kat, if this boy really liked you, he'd make the effort.

Kat

Thank you for saying that out loud, dad. That really makes me feel so much better

Walter

(Noting that Bianca's date obviously didn't go well) Please tell me what Joey did to you.

Can you just leave me in peace with my ice cream and Sex in the City marathon, please.

Walter

Did he try to have sex in your city?

Ugh! I don't want to talk about it right now, dad. Why didn't they make you with an "off" switch.