[to Donna] I've never asked you this before and it seems a bit stupid since we've been shagging each other's brains out for the last month but… would you like to go for a drink sometime?
S2 E1On the Blob
They may have a sneeze guard but it's no match for embryotic fluid!
Now, let me think. When did I last see my own clout?
S2 E2Bungle
You two should never talk. You've got one of them relationships based on lust and you must never lose that.
S2 E3Dirty Girls
Apparently it’s illegal to advertise yourself in phone boxes. Ask me why, I don’t know. British Telecom do it.
We have some spare va va voom in the kitchen if you want to borrow it.
S2 E4Vomit
Donna, you look... beautiful; would you like to be my pop tart and live in my toaster of love?
S2 E5Crusty Curtains
There's no such thing as a perfect couple. Well, except Chris Evans and Billie. Sat there getting pissed with an 18-year-old every day. How perfect is that?
S2 E6Mo Mo and Pigsy
[motivating himself] You are Gaz Wilkinson. A beast of a man. You are strong. You are confident. You are Gaz Wilkinson. And girls want to touch you.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Two Pints of Lager and a Packet of Crisps pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.