Alan and Jake in “Release the Dogs”

He's [Jake] growing up, getting a life of his own. He'll be going off to college soon. I'll only see him on holidays, only hear from him when he needs money -- not that I'll have any, I'll still be paying alimony to two ex-wives! And college tuition? That just means selling an organ or turning tricks. And for what? So that he can get a worthless piece of paper that he can then fold into a hat to wear to the fast food job that he will probably get fired from for stealing fries from the customers' bags! [he leaves the kitchen]

I do like fries.