[after Evelyn introduced the still-injured Alan to Mona]
Mona
What happened to you?
Alan
I was fixing a satellite dish and I fell off the roof.
Mona
Well, why didn't you just call the guy?
Alan
You wanna know why I didn't call the guy? I'll tell you why I didn't call the guy. BECAUSE YOU DON'T NEED TO CALL THE GUY! It's a simple adjustment that any idiot can do, and yes, I know this idiot fell off the roof, but it was after I fixed it all by myself, NO GUY!
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