[Opening narration] My name is Doctor Owen Harper, and this is my life. A life that is full of action. And violence. And work and wonder. Secrets. And sex. And love. And heartbreak. Death. My death. The death I survived. The death I'm now living through. Except.... this isn't living. Every day is the same. I get up. Get ready for work. Same as everyone else. The thing is, I'm not the same. I get to work and everyone is doing the same old thing. Babbling away about aliens, weddings. I'm not real. Three days ago I died. And they think I'm fine. But they're wrong.
“A Day in the Death” · Season 2, Episode 8
In this episode: Owen Harper (10), Ianto Jones (3), Gwen Cooper (2), Jack Harkness (1), Martha Jones (1)
Yeah, I was brought back. Like Jesus really, but without the beard, you know. Shit, I'm never gonna have a beard. Not that I wanted one, you understand, but you know, one day I...
MMaggie
Okay, you're dead, and clearly that's a bit shit, and I'm sorry and everything, but if, if you are dead, then why are you here? You can't be wanting to jump, you can't die twice!
Sorry, are you an expert?
MMaggie
Sorry, are you an idiot?
Yeah, I'm a dead idiot.
FFarrington
What are you?
I'm broken. I'm Dr Owen Harper. And I'm having one hell of a day
MMaggie
So she offers to help you and you push her away. Charming.
Yeah, hole in the chest. Sorry if I don't follow social niceties any more.
MMaggie
You mean you did before?
God, you're a pain in the arse, aren't you?
There is no sign of any muscle decay. You're in great shape, as ever.
No use coming onto me, Jones. I'm a changed man.
And no stiffening anywhere?
Well...
Just answer the question
[to Jack about him trying to drown himself] You were watching?
Skinny guy in tight jeans runs into water? I was taking pictures!
I always loved Tintin.
Yeah, well you would, wouldn't you? And he never had a girlfriend, did he? Just the dog, so I reckon he was actually shagging the dog.
[Beat]
Meanwhile, back at Torchwood...
You okay?
[snidely] What do you think? I bet you're loving this, aren't you? It's like you've finally won.
I didn't realize we were in a competition.
Oh, come on! Even Tosh had more of a life than you used to. And now you're always out on missions, you're shagging Jack, and I'm stuck here making the coffee!
[defensively] It's not like that. Me and Jack.
Yeah, yeah... You and Jack. Gwen's getting married, Martha's got her bloke - God, even Tosh had Tommy! This is really shit!
We've all gone through shit. I've seen you dissect alien corpses, I've seen you save so many lives. Are you really going to let this beat you?
We've been monitoring Parker for ages, nothing to be scared of, is there?
[uncomfortable pause] Unlike, say... Tintin?
Okay, I never liked Tintin. [everyone smirks] What? He's weird! He's got a funny face. And his hair is just... it's horrible.
I always loved Tintin.
Yeah, well you would. And he never had a girlfriend, did he? Just the dog, so I reckon he was actually shagging the dog. [gives a grin. Ianto looks at him in disgust]
Okay, meanwhile, back at Torchwood...
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Torchwood pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.