Andy Davidson quotes from Torchwood

Andy

Do you think this is the end of the world?

Gwen

Oh, Andy, don't be silly. Do you think the world's gonna end on your shift?

Andy

I've seen you use that smile on a lot of people.

Gwen

What smile?

Andy

That smile you use to reassure people, when deep down, you know everything's gone to shit.

Andy

Listen, I was going to ask... promise me you won't laugh. Have you got any vacancies coming up? You know, with Torchwood? I was thinking, I'm great to work with... You know, you could tip 'em the wink?

Gwen

[hesitantly] Maybe, yeah.

Andy

Everyone's on stand-by. It's red alert, riot gear and everything, all ready to mobilize, except no one's saying why. What's going on?

Gwen

I can't tell you.

Andy

I am the police!

Gwen

Right now, I need you to drive this car, and if I told you...

Andy

What? Well c'mon then, what? [Gwen doesn't answer] Don't you bloody hate people who don't finish their sentences?

Rhys

Hey, she's pregnant.

Gwen

Oh, thank you. Who's "she" when she's at home?

Andy

[surprised] Bloody hell fire! Who's the father?

Rhys

Oh, I'm slapping you, yet!

Gwen

It's Torchwood. That's what did it. They give you Retcon and chemicals and radiation and god knows what. The bloody Pill didn't stand a chance. That's what Torchwood does, you see... it ruins your life.

Rhys

How is it ruined?

Gwen

You want to have kids in a world like this, Rhys?

Rhys

You're not getting rid of it!

Gwen

Is that right?