[Scumbag are back in play]
So, starter for ten, fingers on the buzzers. Who is the richest person in the world?
[Vyvyan unwittingly buzzes in while tampering with his microphone]
Scumbag, Vyvyan.
[pause] What?
[to his team] We're getting thrashed! We're getting completely thrashed! Isn't there some way we can cheat?
Neil [feeling desperate for the toilet]: Guys, guys, look. It's beginning to seep out, guys. Please!
It's very simple, Neil. Use the jug.
[Mike pours the water out of the jug, and onto Lord Snot]
Now, I'll have to hurry you, I'll have to hurry you. Who is the richest person in the world?
[Lord Snot buzzes in]
Footlights, Snot.
It's me, isn't it?
No, I'm afraid not. Your father's multi-national collapsed early this morning.
Oh, damn!
[The jug that Neil was using to urinate in falls on top of Lord Snot's head]
So, with the score... with the score still standing at 25 to nothing, here goes...
[Vyvyan buzzes in]
I'm completely bloody sick of this! [he stamps a hole in his booth and knocks out Kendal Mintcake] Give us some easy ones, Bambi, you big bottom boil!
Relax, we can handle this. Vyvyan?
[whilst getting a German World War II grenade ready] Achtung!
[he throws the grenade into Footlights' booth; Ms. Money-Sterling buzzes in]
It's not an automatic...
[the grenade explodes, blowing Footlights to smithereens]
Ok, Bambi. Let's hear another.
So here goes with the starter for ten: What is the record number of marshmallows stuffed up one nostril?
[Mike buzzes in]
Scumbag, Mike.
Er, 604, Toxteth O'Grady, USA.
I told you that, Mike, you bloody cheat!
Ten points, Scumbag, and your question. Who produced the world's stickiest bogey?
[Mike buzzes in again]
Toxteth O'Grady.
Correct, five points.
[to Mike] You bum-bag!
The world's stupidest bottom burp?
[Neil buzzes in]
Rick, Britain!
Correct, five points.
It is not!
And finally, for five bonus points to take you into the lead - who's been tampering with my question cards?
[Rick buzzes in]
It was me! It was me! [the audience boo at Scumbag] Damn! Damn!
[Scumbag are constantly booed at, and pelted with rubbish, until they're crushed by a giant éclair. The scene changes when a doctor picks up the éclair]
Oh no, this sticky bun's covered with human beings the size of amoebas. [he feeds the éclair to an elephant] Here, Jumbo. Get that down your esophagus.
Very good.
Anyway, as I was saying, the most interesting theory...
[End credits roll as he is talking]
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