Damon Salvatore quotes from The Vampire Diaries

Damon

Just remember, we're trying to keep a low profile. Why don't you just walk up to Sheriff Forbes and ask her to tap a vein?

Stefan

Have my actions negatively impacted you? Whoo... I can't imagine what that must feel like.

Damon

You've been off the human stuff for years, Stefan. If you're having trouble controlling...

Stefan

I'm not having any trouble.

Damon

Who do you think you're talking to? I know what it's like! That "Jekyll and Hyde' feeling... There's that switch - sometimes it goes off and you snap...

John

Hey, partner!

Damon

What do you want?

John

You haven't returned any of my calls.

Damon

Most people would take that as a hint.

John

I'll tell the entire council what you are.

Damon

Go for it! I'll kill every last one of them. Then I'll sever your hand, pull your ring off, and I'll kill you, too. Do you understand that?

Anna

I remember this event from 1864. I was supposed to enter...before everything happened.

Damon

Ah, nostalgia's a bitch.

Anna

If you're just gonna mock me, could you move along, please?

Elena

Hey! You...can't be back here.

Damon

We need to talk.

Elena

Does it have to be right now?

Damon

Normally I would have a completely different outlook on what I'm about to tell you, but since it could really inconvenience me, I'll...squeal.

Elena

What are you talking about?

Damon

Stefan's still drinking human blood.

Elena

...What?

Damon

Yeah. (shrugs) A month ago, I would've rejoiced. But with the council back on the alert, it is not a good time for Stefan to fly off the handle.

Elena

I know he's been a little edgy, but, he said that was normal...

Damon

He has a fridge, full of stolen blood bank contraband, in the house.

Elena

Oh my God...

Damon

He has no idea what normal is - his entire existence isn't normal. Normal to a vampire is drinking human blood, but he's spent all this time fighting it, when he should have been learning how to control it. And now it's controlling him, instead.

Stefan

What's going on in here?

Damon

Just filling Elena in on your extra-curricular activities.

Stefan

(scoffs) What are you talking about?

Elena

I know about the blood, Stefan.

Damon

I'm gonna... I'll be downstairs. Drinking.

Damon

Alright, now this is getting weird...

Anna

We're here to talk.

Damon

Not in the mood! Today's been a no-good, very-bad day.

Damon

Sure you wanna do this?

Elena

I'm sure.

Damon

(closes dungeon door) There's no guarantee this is gonna work.

Elena

It has to.

Damon

(starts to leave) Coming?

Elena

I'm gonna stay here. (sits, leaning against the wall)

Damon

(sits across from her)

Elena

(referring to Stefan) It's so hard to see him locked up like this.

Damon

You're the one who locked him up.

Elena

You helped.

Damon

I couldn't have him running around chewing on people while the town was looking for vampires, now, could I?

Elena

It had nothing to do with you actually caring about him...

Damon

Your thing, not mine.

Damon

So, you'll be here again tonight?

Elena

Is that a problem?

Damon

Yes. You're a complete nuisance.

Elena

What's his favorite type-- um...

Damon

Type of what?

Elena

Type of...animal blood that he prefers?

Damon

Ewww. Gross.

Elena

Your joking doesn't help.

Damon

It helps me.

Elena

(chuckles)

Damon

Hurry up, I can't babysit all night. I've things to do.

Elena

I would say "drop dead", but...

Damon

Ha-ha. Stefan likes...puppy blood. Little Golden Retriever puppies with cute, floppy ears. That's his favorite.

Damon

The sun hurts my eyes.

Stefan

That's part of it. The muscle aches, the sick feeling. Emily says it's our bodies pushing us to feed; to complete the transition.

Damon

That's not gonna happen.

Stefan

Is that your choice, then? To die, instead?

Damon

Isn't it yours? This was all to be with Katherine. She's gone. I want it over.

Damon

I don't have any friends, Elena.

Elena

Right.

Damon

Give me the address.

Alaric

What, so you can go without me? No, I don't think so.

Damon

I'm not going with you. You tried to kill me.

Alaric

Well, you did kill me.