“Don't Fear the Roofer” quotes from The Simpsons

Bart

Dad, remember how you said if I used a chainsaw unsupervised I'd hurt myself? Well, you were wrong. I hurt someone else.

Homer

So what's Stephen Hawking doing here?

I live here now. You're looking at the new owner of the Little Caesars down the street. Pizza, pizza. Pizza, pizza. Pizza, pizza. Pizza, pizza. Sorry, that button sticks.

Homer

So why didn't you invite me?

Carl

We couldn't tell you ahead of time because you'd spill the beans.

Marge

We're going to take the dog to the V-E-T.

Huh?

Marge

Then take Bart to get C-I-R-C-U-M-C-I-S-E-D.

Bart

Huh?

Marge

I'll tell you what it means when it's over, honey.

Look at the size of that nacho plate. I haven't seen this much melted cheese since I left my Billy Joel albums out in the sun.

Homer

Ha ha ha ha ha, the sun.

Hey you want to split this?

Homer

Wow. It's been so long since I've been with someone who doesn't know what a selfish pi