The Doctor quotes from The Sarah Jane Adventures

[to Rani] What do you mean, the Mona Lisa?

The coffin was the trap. The coffin was the solution. That's so neat I could write a thesis.

[Bursting into the room] STOP THIS WEDDING NOW!

Do not worry, Sarah Jane. It is the angel.

TRICKSTER, LET HER GO!

Too late, Time Lord. You are mine, Sarah Jane! Mine forever!

DOCTOR!

Ah, you look better in black! Or is white the new black?

At last, Doctor! I could feel this moment reverberating back through the ages: the meeting of the Pantheon of Discord and the last of the Time Lords!

I've known the legends of the Pantheon since I was a little boy. I've fought your shadows and your changelings, I never thought we'd actually meet!

And I know the legends of the Doctor! The man of ice and fire, who walked among gods. Once held the key to time in his hands! Now, he is surrounded by children!

They're my friends! Which reminds me, you're looking a bit lonely for a pantheon!

I embody multitudes! But who are you- the man who has lost everybody!- to talk to me of loneliness, when the Gate is waiting for you!?

What do you mean?

Sarah Jane

Is this the last time I'm ever going to see you?

[Brief pause] I don't know. I hope not.

Sarah Jane

[Smiling] Goodbye, Doctor, until the next time.

Don't forget me, Sarah Jane.

Sarah Jane

No-one's ever going to forget you.

Clyde

You were right. He is amazing!

Good, so gosh, that was different. Hello, everyone!

Rani

Who are you? Where's Clyde?

Come on, Rani, use your brain; Clyde and I swapped places, yes? So I'm where he was, he's where I was, which means right now— oh. He's in a lot of trouble...

Sarah Jane

It's you, isn't it? Oh, you've done it again!

[smiles] Hello, Sarah Jane.

Sarah Jane

Doctor? [the Doctor nods]

Rani

[gapes] That's the Doctor?

What, Doctor? The Doctor?! My Doctor?!

Sarah Jane

Well, he can change his face-

Oh, I know...but into a baby's?

Oi, imagine it from my point of view! Last time I saw you Jo Grant, you were, what, twenty? Twenty-one? It's like someone baked you!

Ah, yes. The Claw Shansheeth of the 15th Funeral Fleet; I've been looking for you. Have you been telling people I'm dead?!

I apologise; The death notice was released a little too soon. But I can rectify this - immediately! [fires an energy beam at the Doctor] I'm so sorry for your loss, Doctor. Rest in peace!

There and there.

Sarah Jane

[applies the sonic lipstick] Does it hurt?

No.

Sarah Jane

I mean the regeneration. That last body of yours, was he okay, I mean?

It always hurts. And there.

Sarah Jane

So how did you end up in this place?

The Shansheeth lured me; a mighty old battlefield just begging to be explored, 'cause I'm travelling with Amy Pond now, and Rory. Then they got married, so I dropped them off on a honeymoon planet, which isn't what you'd think; It's not a planet for a honeymoon, it's a planet on a honeymoon. It married an asteroid. [Sarah Jane and the Doctor laugh] And they nicked the TARDIS. The Shansheeth, not Amy and, err... Fortunately, I had all this wreckage to build a space swapping doodah-thingy-whatsit.

So you have a married couple in the TARDIS.

Mr and Mrs Pond!

I only left you because I got married.

[quietly, to Sarah Jane] And there.

Did you think I was stupid?

Why do you say that?

Well, I was a bit dumb; still am, I suppose.

[turning to face Jo] Now what in the world would make you think that, ever, ever, ever?

We had been travelling down the Amazon for months and we reached a village in Crystalline, and it was the only place in thousands of miles that has a telephone, so I called you; I just wanted to say hello. And they told me that you left, left U.N.I.T, never came back, so I waited and waited, because you said you would see me again; you did; I asked you and you said yes, you promised, so I thought one day I would hear that sound, deep in the jungle; I would hear that funny wheezing noise and a big blue box right in the middle of the rainforest, because you wouldn't just leave; not forever, not me. [starts to cry] I've waited my whole, silly life.

Oh, but you're an idiot.

Well, there we have it!

No, but don't you see? How could I ever find you? You've spent the past 40 years living in huts, climbing up trees, tearing down barricades. You've done everything from flying kites on Kilimanjaro to sailing down the Yangtze in a tea-chest. Not even the TARDIS could pin you down!

Hold on... I did sail down the Yangtze in a tea-chest! How did you know?

And that family! All 7 kids, 12 grandchildren, 13th on his way. He's dyslexic, but that'll be fine; great swimmer.

So you've been watching me? All this time?

No. Because you're right. I don't look back. I can't. But the last time I was dying, I looked back on all of you. Every single one. And I was so proud.

Listen to me, both of you. I want you to remember.

We are remembering - That's the trouble!

No no no no no no no. I want you to remember everything. Every single day with me. Every single second.

What's he doing?

Because your memories are more powerful than anything else on this planet. Just think of it, Sarah. Remember it, Jo. But properly. Properly. Give the Memory Weave everything. Every planet. Every face. Every mad man. Every loss. Every sunset. Every scent. Every terror. Every joy. Every Doctor. Every me.

Sarah Jane

I remember!

No!

I remember!

Now, Sarah Jane, what was your son's name?

Sarah Jane

Luke! He's called Luke...And the computer's called Mr Smith!

Calling Luke and Mr Smith! This is the Doctor! [Luke looks up from where he's sitting] Come on, shake a leg!

Luke

Is Mum there?

Oh, she's fine and dandy!

Sarah Jane

[overjoyed] Yes!

Now, Mr Smith, I want you to harness the Rift power, and loop it round the TARDIS - You got that?

Mr Smith

I regret I will need remote access to TARDIS basecode numerals.

[winces] Oh blimey, that's gonna take a while...

Sarah Jane

No, no! Let me! [runs up to the monitor] K-9! Out you come!

Affirmative, Mistress!

[laughs delightedly] Good dog! K-9, give Mr Smith the basecode!

Master. [connects to Mr Smith] TARDIS basecode now being transferred. The process is simple!