Dennis Becker quotes from The Rockford Files

Dennis Becker

[Jim's been arrested - again] What do you think, I'm an information bureau? I mean, once a month, I'm locked up in a room with you, with a tape running. It's putting a strain on our friendship.

Dennis Becker

Make lieutenant? I'll be lucky if I make the end of the week!

Dennis

Let me get this straight: You have a client who has the same name as Herman Goering's HOUSE?!

Dennis Becker

I'll tell you what I'm going to do, Jim: I'm going to fill this out, give it to patrol, but don't count on much.

Jim

Now what is that supposed to mean? I got kidnapped by two guys, and they beat the poo out of me, I'm making a legitimate complaint. What do you mean, "don't count on too much," I'm counting on you and this girl scout troop in here, to solve it.

Dennis Becker

Shut up, will ya? What do I have to do, spell it out for you? You know, you're not exactly Princess Margaret in this department. Every time you come in here with a bloody nose, morale goes up ten points, and if I weren't a buddy of yours I wouldn't even type this up. OK?

If he turns up dead, and I can find anything to prove that you knew something that could have saved him, you're gonna wind up an accessory after the fact in his murder.

Jim

No, I'm not. I'm not even gonna be a material witness, unless the DA can establish me on preliminary, which he can't. There's no foundation. And he can't get me into cross-examination for the same reason. So... [winks at Highland] thanks for the invitation. I think I'll go fishing.

Dennis Becker

He's been around, Captain.

Dennis Becker

Jim, the police department operates without fear or favor.

Jim

Theoretically.

Dennis Becker

That's right, theoretically. As to fear, half the time we work in a cold sweat. As to favor, every stiff gets the same consideration, except a dead cop.

Dennis

[suspiciously] What are you going to do, Jim?

Jim

Oh...I don't know ... go home ... take a shower .....

Dennis

Stay out of it.

Jim

... stay out of it...

Angel

[enters the squad room, trying to avoid meeting Sgt. Becker] Jimmy, Jimmy, come here. [motions for Rockford to come over to him]

Jim

Angel, where have you been?

Angel

Jimmy, can I talk to you for a second? I know you're mad at me. I know this thing can be explained, I swear.

Jim

Where's my car?

Angel

Your car? It's fine. There's no need to report it stolen, Jimmy. I filled it up with gas, I even got it washed.

Angel

Hi Captain!

Dennis Becker

You've got jailbird written all over you. Where'd you do time, sport?

Angel

Time? Time... [he reaches into his pocket for his watch] It's five o'clock. [He reaches for Rockford] C'mon let's go.

Angel

San Quentin. Four years, but I got out in three for good behavior. I even sang in the choir, didn't I, Jimmy?

Dennis Becker

Who's this guy?

Jim

Oh, uh, Angel Martin, Dennis Becker.

Dennis Becker

Angel Martin... you're in the known associate's file.

Angel

Right, right, probably with Jimmy, we were both in at San Quentin, together. [laughing] I guess you could say we both owned a 'piece of the rock.'

[at police HQ where Rockford is being held on suspicion of murder] And then I held him at, ah, gunpoint for ten, fifteen minutes, and then you guys showed up. [he nods his head at Beth, who is staring at him blankly] Hi. [he turns back to Becker grinning] Will you take a look at her! She's so starstruck she's speechless!

Dennis Becker

Is that everything? The whole statement?

Yeah, yeah that's it. [he turns back to Beth] Ah, listen honey, try not to stare. I know it's difficult, but why don't you just relax and later the two of us will go get some coffee. I'll let you look at my scrapbook, hah?

Beth

That'd be lovely, only I gave up reading the funnies in the third grade.

Jim

Dennis, let's talk about this, huh? Now look...

Dennis Becker

It's out of my hands, Jim!

Jim

Dennis, what if Scotty just found out that you and Peggy went off a bridge. Now where would you want him to spend the next 24 hours, with Rocky and me or downtown in that wire mesh hellhole, huh?

Jim

So I'd like to know who the cops were on the case.

Dennis Becker

Now just wait a minute.

Jim

Five'll getcha ten Lieutenant Hall was on the desk.

Dennis Becker

There's one thing I'm not gonna do is hang this on the police department!

Jim

Then why was he sniffing around this thing, huh? Go on Dennis, check it out.

Dennis Becker

I don't have to! It wasn't Lieutenant Hall!

Jim

Just 'cause he's a cop, he can't get jacked up over a half a million dollars?

Dennis Becker

Shut up Jim!

Lt. Doug Chapman

Bobby Boyajian's brothers tell us that you two guys took the kid apart in the wedding chapel in La Jolla, and now he's dead. So don't sit there like butter wouldn't melt in your mouths!

Jim

I don't care what they say, we didn't start anything, it was Boyajian himself.

Angel

That's right, they're a bunch of liars, if you've ever dealt with the Boyajians, you'd know what creeps they are!

Lt. Doug Chapman

Mr. Martin, Bobby's sister Regine said that you telephoned her at Azie Boyajian's house last night, you tried to arrange a meeting with her brother so you could iron out some problems, is that right?

Jim

Wait a minute, Angel, you did what?

Angel

Regine can't testify against me, she's my legal wife.

Lt. Doug Chapman

Regine hung up on you, Mr. Martin, so maybe you telephoned Bobby at his home and he agreed to meet you.

Dennis Becker

Bobby's wound was point-blank. It had to be somebody who knew him, somebody who could walk right up to him.

Lt. Doug Chapman

Right. So what I'm saying is this: you (points at Angel), or you (points at Jim) or both of you met Bobby and got what you really wanted, which wasn't to iron out any problems, but to fill the kid's face with double-aught buckshot!

Dennis Becker

It was birdshot, Lieutenant!

Beth Davenport

[Slams her purse on table] Birdshot, buckshot, how much speculation do we have to listen to?! You may have a motive, maybe opportunity, but do you have an eyewitness, a weapon, anything that's at all solid?

Jim

Well, I think that ought to take care of that. I don't think the District Attorney's office is gonna file on loose charges, will they?

Lt. Doug Chapman

Sit down, Rockford!

Jim

What for, you can't file a charge?

Lt. Doug Chapman

Not on the homicide, not yet. But I've got you on fraud, grand theft! Complaint signed by the Boyajian brothers. Sergeant, get somebody from the Bunko Squad up here, book these guys for the Red Barn Con. [Dennis leaves. Chapman removes the visitors' passes from Rockford and Angel's chests] Like I said, sit down, gentlemen.

Dennis Becker

Let me get this straight if I can. What you're saying is that a Beverly Hills psychiatrist, an Encino stockbroker, a San Marino lawyer and the biggest subdivider in the next county, all got together to do an old man out of three acres without the daughter's knowledge, but with her consent and full cooperation?

Jim

I don't know if they all got together, Dennis, but they're all doing it to him.

Dennis Becker

There's nothing to tie them together and from what you said, I'd say the old man's right where he belongs.

Jim

Okay, so his lifestyle doesn't help his case any. But since when is eccentricity punishable by torture? And besides, Muellard knew about the attempt on my life, which ties him to something. Or did you forget somebody tried to kill me yesterday?

Dennis Becker

Look, Jimbo, what can I do?

Jim

Well, did you run a check on the nitrous oxide tank?

Dennis Becker

Yup. Dr. Fellows ran an inventory against supply and accounted for every tank. So there's nothing there. And Fellows is the director of Horizons Crest.

Jim

Well, he's in on it, too.

Dennis Becker

Oh, good, now I can add a Woodland Hills doctor to your list of co-conspirators.

Jim

Whaddaya think, Dennis?

Dennis Becker

Well, everybody's talkin' to me. It's kinda nice having friends.

Jim

Yeah.

Dennis Becker

But you know somethin'? I still hate surprise parties.

Peggy Becker

Just what is a buff?

Dennis Becker

[looks uncomfortable] Well, it's a citizen who is fascinated by the police work. Like, you know, people who are into CB radios and broadwave shows, these people are buffs as we call them: they like to spend their time around the station getting to know the fellas, sorta hang out...

Peggy Becker

[angry] Dennis, that's not a buff, that's a groupie!