A character in The Real Ghostbusters
Peter Venkman
The Real Ghostbusters · 75 quotes
Most-quoted character in The Real Ghostbusters: in 51 of its 75 quotes
Most scenes with: Egon Spengler (14), Ray Stantz (14), Winston Zeddemore (10)
Just what do you expect to find at the end of the cord, Egon?
My first guess would be a terminus of such unimaginable densely packed evil energy that it could fry a psychic researcher without blinking.
What's your second guess?
Hey, he was only kidding!
No I wasn't.
Oh no. This is worse than I thought.
What? we're finally gonna be rid of Slimer. What could be worse than that?
We're not going to be rid of Slimer. We're going to be inundated with hundreds of thousands of millions of Slimers.
I'm sorry I asked.
[the Ghostbusters are watching a baseball game between good and evil spirits]
But I just want to point out, seeing as you're new to this game and all, that Evil just cheated.
Full tilt, flat out, no doubt about it!
Doesn't that call for a forfeiture of the game?
You mean declare Evil the losers for cheating?
That about sums it up, yeah.
But Evil cheats. That's its nature. It does whatever unscrupulous or immoral thing it has to in order to win. That's why we call them Evil. Only Good is not allowed to cheat. If Good adopts the ways of Evil, then it becomes Evil. So if Good cheats, Evil automatically wins. Got it? PLAY BALL!
I wonder if Good is allowed to steal bases.
Maybe Good just borrows 'em, Ray.
Peter, do you know how to set your proton pack on explosive overload?
No.
I do.
Dopey Dog Dopey Dog flying through the air, Dopey Dog Dopey Dog flying everywhere, come on boy we need you don't let us down, "Dopey Dog Dopey Dog we need you!
So we made a deal, and I gave him the power to make anything vanish, and he used it on... chickens! I could've given him wealth, power, fame! But he wastes it! Wastes ME on chickens! CHICKENS! (catches Ray making the crazy gesture about him) I need you, but don't push it.
What I can't figure is what do you need us for? I mean, you've fulfilled your half of the deal, why the concern?
(appears at the door) Hey Morganon! Seen any chickens lately? Eh hahahahaha! Oh! Hey! The boss was looking for someone to handle a new deal, but he couldn't use you! The King of Rowdania doesn't have feathers! But I just want to say... Ah hahahahahaha! (leaves)
Does that answer your question? For a demon of my status to strike a bargain over... chickens... is embarrassing. It's ruining my reputation!
How did they find out?
(glares at his imprisoned imp) I have a pretty good idea.
That thing hurt Ecto-1!
The world's being destroyed and he worries about Ecto-1. We should really speak to him later about his priorities.
If there is a later.
Y'know, you're really no fun anymore.
You've got an idea don't you, you kidder you. A way we can take this guy out. C'mon, fill us in.
There's only one way. We'll have to set our proton packs on simultaneous overload.
Oh great, Egon. We do that and it'll take Jeremy out all right. And the building. There'll be a blast crater half a mile wide!
And since we'll have to keep hold of 'em until they blow, to make sure they aren't turned off…oh man.
We take out everything within a quarter mile, ourselves with it, and hope it's enough to destroy him too before he can destroy the rest of the world.
It's a great plan! Count me in.
The Necronomicon's spells are like sonic keys that can open portals to other dimensions, where the Great Old Ones wait to take over the Earth.
Yeah? Give me an example.
Cathulhu.
Gesundheit.
Cathulhu...I've heard of him. He's bad, right?
He makes Gozer look like Little Mary Sunshine.
Maybe the noise was physical in origin. Squirrels on the roof, perhaps.
[a huge pounding sound starts to shake the whole house]
Squirrels, Egon?
Okay, fat squirrels, playing basketball. Satisfied?
How come whenever we go into these situations, we never find anything cute? It's always big and mean with lots of teeth.
I agree. We're definitely falling into a rut.
This is almost as much fun as catching bowling balls with my teeth.
Hey, what're you guys doing in that mirror? Is Lewis Carroll in there with you?
What happens if we cross the streams?
All of our molecules go on separate vacations.
Aces and Eights. Dead man's hand.
What have you got, stranger?
Uh, four aces?
That's a lot of aces.
You know what this means?
We're using a canasta deck?
Someone at this table is a cheat.
[dives out the doors] Good thing I didn't show them that fifth ace.
Dance.
Only if I can lead.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's The Real Ghostbusters pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
