Mr. Sheffield My nanny did nothing, my wife is hopefully not seeing this
All S1
S1 E15Unfinished Business
Grace Dad have you seen Fran?
Mr. Sheffield No grace we can't go off running to Fran for every little thing she's no longer the nanny you know she's my wife now
Grace Wow one night on the couch sure whipped you into shape
Mr. Sheffield I did not spend the night on the couch Fran and i made up.
You just don't know how to work your father like I do.
No, I don't look as good in a halter top as you do.
Fran, I'm 20 years old. Doesn't Dad know that... you know... I'm active?
You doing the bing bing? I love that you feel so comfortable that you want to be totally honest with me so let me be totally honest with you... Get upstairs!! What are you, crazy?! You're never leaving my house again!!
Mr. Sheffield ( talking about what Fran did) Actually besides taking care of the children, the nanny would make sure that the tie she had picked out for me, would match the shoes that she had picked out for me. Then she'd make reservations for myself and uhm (looking at the nanny) ..her. And well sometimes when i was working late at night, she'd come in here to the office, jump up on my desk (smirking) cross her legs in a most enticing manner
Sweetheart Sara's parents are going to be here any minute.
All right what are you so nervous about, I thought you said they were thrilled when you told them we got married.
Well darling I lied
What do you mean you didn't tell them. Are you ashamed of me? am i embarrassing to you? Why aren't you answering?
Sweetheart your very special, your...your an acquired taste like feta cheese.
Your comparing me to smelly Greek Cheese?
Sweetheart these are Sara's parents this is a very sensitive situation for them, I mean in their minds you are in fact replacing their daughter so I want to break It to them gently.
Who compares a wife to cheese?
Oh forget the cheese your not a cheese your a beautiful, vibrant, sexy, charming woman. Now their gonna be here any minute and i want you to make a good impression so please get out of that robe.
all right (opens robe, but realizes she's naked and Max and Sara's parents see it). what do you think they'll think of this?
(seeing his wife Fran naked) I don't know why don't you ask them (he points towards the door)
Well darling I smoothed things over I think when I told them that the naked nanny in my living room was now my naked wife.
How could they be contesting the adoption? On what grounds?
They think you're an unfit mother.
Unfit?! I'm in the best shape of my life. I know what this is all about. They don't like my people.
No, sweetheart, they're not anti-Semitic. They're best friends with the Rothchilds.
I meant my mother.
Darling, Darling i know all about your past. before I hired you I had you thoroughly investigated
What?
Yea I'm not about to trust some stranger with my children am I?
Mr. Sheffield (In an exciting, sexy voice he asks Fran a question) Come on didn't you check me out? Mmm (Kisses her on the cheek)
(In a sexy voice) oh I checked you out
You have absolutely nothing to confess. I know everything about you.
Everything? Even my age?
Actually, that was the one thing even the FBI couldn't verify. The closest they could get was 31.
31?.... [Happily] Well, I guess the truth is out.
I am so nervous about my new boyfriend coming over for dinner tonight.
Why? Because you have to prepare the chateaubriand, polish the silver and comb the fringe around the area rugs?
No, you do that.
Then chill out, girlie.
Because of your support, Michael and I have decided to move in together.
Honey, that's fantastic! Are you gonna be needing a nanny? Because I'm gonna be available.
[Catching Maggie in bed with Michael]
What the hell do you think you were doing?!
Well, I think it's pretty—
I know what they were doing! I wanna know why they were doing it!
Well, I think—
I know why they were doing it!
Assuming means you could be wrong (Max looks at Fran) people were assuming we were having sex when you were my nanny and they were wrong.
It's going to pretty difficult for me to tell her she can't do something that well I recently discovered that is is (in a sexy voice) just so amazing.
I don't care, (he then realizes the nice comment about his love making) Thank You (to Fran with a smile on his face)
[Reading a pregnancy test manual] It says: "If you're not pregnant, it'll turn pink. If you are pregnant, it will turn blue." As will we all. Oh, honey, this wouldn't have happened if you had just listened to me.
Fran, you said I could do whatever I want in my own house.
WHATever, not WHOever!
Fran, I'm so nervous.
Sweetie, listen, whatever happens, don't worry. You won't have to go through this by yourself.
I'm so glad I have you.
I love you. [Hugs] I don't want to put pressure on you or anything but if for some reason you are pregnant, life is gonna change forever. No husband, no house, no money... and it ain't gonna be a picnic for you either.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's The Nanny pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.