AAttorney
(walking over to Fran, reading the piece of paper on his clipboard) Juror number two. Sorry, but under marital status, does this say Divorced?
(looking at what she wrote) No. Disgusted.
All S1
S1 E15Unfinished Business
Juror [to CC]: You like a sensitive guy?
Yes. I used to be one.
[Counselling Niles] All this anger and bitterness is just a mask for low self-esteem. Where does all this come from?
Hey, Niles, could you wash my underwear?
Darling, I've known the butler 30 years. We've had many gay times together, shared a fag or two between us and I can tell you, if there was anything queer about him, I'd know it.
So in other words, you had some fun, you smoked a few cigarettes and there's nothing strange about him.
Of course.
Just making sure.
A woman just called and told me that Ma may not be my real mother.
So are we happy or sad?
We're thinking.
[to Maxwell] I have a friend at CBS who wants to buy our show and turn it into a TV series.
Whoa, back up. You have a friend?
Ladies, tell me: What could be better than my new play being nominated for a Tony Award?
Your face on my grandchild.
Alright, now this Is It. Now, if they start to shoot our row, I don't want anyone making rabbit ears behind anyone else's heads, alright? Just behave yourselves.
When did I ever do that?
I wasn't speaking to you.
Oh, one time at the Angela Lansbury roast. Would you let It go?
Now Miss. Fine you did understand this party was for cast and crew only, I mean you really weren't expecting to be invited were you?
No (She rips off her robe revealing a dress)
If Barbra Streisand and your mother were both drowning, who would you save?
I'd save my mother. Barbra can walk on water.
Does everyone eat like this on the Jewish holidays, Ms. Fine?
Why do you think we wandered the desert for 40 years? We were walking off the meal.
TTasha
You are exactly what I've been looking for. You are the voice of the people.
And not just the people. Dogs hear me too.
[To C.C.] Look at your shiny new coat. Have you been adding cod liver oil to your diet?
Ms. Fine, before Tom and his son get here, we have a little saying in the theatre: "Mess with the investor, move back in with your mother."
I have a saying: "Mess with the nanny... please."
I just spent four hours putting together a gazebo for Ms. Babcock's terrace.
Ms. Babcock doesn't have a terrace.
Now we both know.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's The Nanny pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.